Rest in Pieces

My Soul

I thoroughly enjoyed this story. I only wish it had a more wrapped up ending.

Your story is absolutely amazing ! Please carry on

very interesting, and I can't wait to read the rest!

Yeah flat chested people. Big boobs are overrated.

Gah. This was fun at first but now Eli's being so infuriating.

Eli met Luffy and Ace when she was 14. There is no way she got that tattoo when she was 15.

when are you going to updated chapter 80 ?

Hello. I am a new reader but this will be the first and the last you'll see of me. :')

First of all, I had high hopes for this fic. Second, you are a very good writer. You have added details, which are very important, and made the story seem like a novel, despite it being a fanfic. Third, I liked her character…at first. Sadly, as soon as I saw some...traits that are common (but understandable) among OCs, I decided that I didn't like her as much as I first thought I do. She's not a Mary Sue, I assure you. There were just some...things that she has done that I didn't like. It's kind of like disliking a trait you found in one of your friends, which is completely reasonable because nobody is perfectly suited to one’s tastes.

Fourth, the events after meeting Makino were a little cliche. At first, I thought that this was set AFTER the two brothers set off to become pirates and I also wondered how she would meet Ace. "Will Ace come back to his home island?" I thought, to which I highly doubted. As I read more, I realized it was actually set in the brothers' childhood years. Now this is where it gets interesting to review on. Living with the ASL brothers in itself is cliche, for me, although this is the first time I have read of such a thing happening in an OCs life.

You see, it is kind of the same with an OC being friends with the Golden Trio of Harry Potter, namely, Harry Potter himself, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley. I am NOT saying it's wrong. What I'm trying to say is that why did I even read a fanfic if I'm just going through the cannon events all over again? Even if I don't remember (as in the case with the Harry Potter series) or haven't read that part yet (as in the whole goddamned One Piece storyline), I still do not, I repeat, DO NOT wish to read it again, even through the eyes of an OC.

One last thing: With my mind set that they were still fourteen years old, I read the part where they had sex. It was a completely outrageous thought. However, I have realized my mistake. He and Eli were actually seventeen when they did it. While that did calm me down, I still think I will not take such an extreme event in silence. It is not that I haven’t read things like this happening before in fanfics containing a cannon character and an OC but the fact that I LIKED your fic made my mind up on writing this review.

Alright, not that everything’s settled. I will be taking my leave. :) I am very sorry for leaving such a disheartening review. It’s just that…I liked your fic and I think my disappointment deserves to be heard. Be assured. I am not telling you to rewrite these events to appease me. I just wanted to let you know my concerns, no matter how hopeless my complaining may seem.

Without further ado, farewell.

I was hoping this story would continue but sadly there has been no recent updates..it's really good so I hope it could pick up!

Looking forward to the next chapter!

"...Or I'll TOUCH you."

That sounded so wrong...

IT WAS WUNDERFUL!

Nonono! DON'T WORRY! I'M REVIEWING! KINDA...

This is such a great story I must know what happens next PLEASE! XD