Hi, I like this story, but I notice way too many grammar problems.

1: You use 'said' a lot to the point where your story telling is inorganic. "Said is Dead." If you want to make the writing of that more compelling, look here or look it up: :/i mag es.
ap o.g l/ AX Zyy gvGd p4d qs Vu6

Please take out the spaces so you can get access to the image I'm sending over.

2: Expand your vocabulary.
3: You make a lot of mistakes in your writing from misspelling, to actual sentence structure. For example, let's take Naruto's sister's atonement and point out that the flaws in it.

"I deserve what happen to me. And I agreed to it, after I gave him the family scroll. I did everything to make it right with brother," Nanato 'said' (again, expand your vocabulary and stop using said so much.) as let sleep take her.

Now for my correction: "I deserved what happened to me. And I agreed to it after I gave him the family scroll. I'll do anything to make it right with him," Nanato weakly responded as SHE let unconsciousness take her."

You can update chapters from the manage stories tab, click on your story and select Update/Replace Chapter. It's simple and there's no hassle unless it's to make proper changes.

Love it.
Please write more soon.

Naruto said, “I want the Whirlpool country and become the Daimyo of that land. All of the Konoha ninjas & villagers will be marked. Naruto tell others villages to treat the Konoha if they were Demon containers.

Don't know what I was really expecting, this site is pretty much FULL of NPC retards.

Great job please continue

This is exactly how Naruto should treat his family in neglect fics ..forgiving his sister's ? Bah...why does he have to...he doesn't know them...forgiving is foolish...he should make them feel how he felt...make them beg...destroy their mind and bodies...and make for death just to be free of it...then Leam them to rot anyways

Your commas are often overused and misplaced

I've always loved this story, from chapter one and this chapter is no different. You my friend and a mater of wordcraft.

I like ur fic, but i'm so poor. So do what u want and can.
I can't support u in that site.
Only prayer u got from me.

Interesting, I say Naruto will eventually beat him.

A great comeback, and please dont wait to long with the next update.

I agree, that is a terrible formula on how to handle your 'savior'.

This is getting good:)

Wow never thought I’d see this story again nice work can’t wait to read the next one

Finally. It's been such a long wait. It's soooooo fun to watch minato and kushina growl and miserable.