Isn’t this Albus Dumbledore who insists that Snape and Malfoy (Draco) deserve second chances and ignores Snape bullying students and abusing his power as a teacher, and Draco, a marked Death Eater who’s attempting murder and almost succeeds in accidentally (though it could be argued that if you attempt to kill someone and end up killing someone else it’s attempted murder and manslaughter which pretty much adds up to equivalent to murder) killing others?

Also, I’m fairly certain the touch-move rule is generally disregarded in casual play and only applies when you touch a piece with the intent to move or take it.

Thank you very much for this story, it is well written and an original premise for an AU story. You wrote the main protagonists as teenagers very well and managed without so many of the tropes and cliches AU stories often attract. Despite losing your muse and love for the story you managed to give it a satisfactory conclusion and i thank you for that, so many stories are just abandoned and left hanging. As this is the first story by you that i have read i am now gleefully looking forward to making my way through your opus.

Did lily & severus get married? You don't make that clear. And frankly, i couldn't work out why lily behaved as she did that first summer in the story: having sex before even proper dating? and in the house when the parents were present? Eew, and then not using contraceptives? The girl is supposed to be clever but she comes over as a brainless nini.

Yet another chapter with extensive notes. If the information is important to the story it should be in it; and if it is not, there is no need for the author's note. I t think this is a very bad habit.

I think your author's notes are far too long - and I don't really like authors' notes in the first place. Shouldn't all this information be IN the story?

A rather disappointing ending. This story is unfinished. It could have been a good story. The idea was great.

Hmmm... It's kinda confusing to follow, to be honest. Had to read it a couple of times to get it. It's a nice story, I can ascertain that, but yeah. I ain't the brightest tool in the shed. Anyway! I love the premise and I hope to read more of you soon. Also, are they going to have a girl or a guy? You're implying them to have a girl so I suppose that's the answer. XD

Hi! I really liked this fic and it was such sweet Lily/Sev. I love the idea of a powerful and somewhat dark Lily and I loved Sev's idea of the Goblins. I liked your open ending, thank you! ;)

Good good

I like this AU, it has the setup for really going in some alt directions to canon. I like what you did with Tobias esp, many stories leave him no more than a abusive drunk after all.

Probably could have left off the Epilogues, even if they do give us a glimpse into how Serverus' plans went re Dumbledore.

Good piece.

:) very good
:( more!

An interesting look at the events surrounding the end of Severus's 5th year. Sev is being the better man, and Dumbles fumbled it.

I read the wasps as being the fragments of Hufflepuff Lilly (black and yellow) trying to get their attention.

Thank you for sharing this might-have-been tale with us. I enjoyed it very much on a sick day at home.

Fascinating tale.

I've been following you and this story for, shit, well over half a decade, and to see this finally come to close is, hmm, it's like saying good bye to an old friend, honestly.
Thank you for writing this, I wish the best in any future stories you've got.

~ Sincerly,
A Fan