I like your story. You handled it with a light touch-not much dialogue or backstory-but it came out feeling just right.
I think the first meeting was the best part, but you pulled off the ending pretty well too.

This was a great fanfiction. The style reminds me of a fic I read before. It is a SasuSaku fic called 'Always runnig out of time'. You might enjoy it if you had not read it yet.

This was so beautiful... I loved how you wrote it, especially the comments in the ( ) and how you drew it out. You said so much without saying it in so many words and it came together in such a fluid manner, it was really inspiring. You really felt their pain and emptiness and mutual love. The only part I didn't get was "just one lonely heart was better than having two". Was it because she was going to make him less lonely and then she'd just stay lonely? But that was my only confusion. Everything else was amazing!

I didn't find it too confusing, just purposefully ambiguous. :3 Your writing style is very refined, and I'm happy to say I didn't see any glaring grammatical errors (there might have been a few but those can slide.)

Some of the times when you used the long dashes and inserted a paragraph in between, the story seemed to be interrupted. The organization was pretty well done in a broad sense, but I feel that you used too many parentheses ("oh so _"). I didn't mind a few of them, but sometimes you had three or four parenthesis that broke the sentence apart.

I really liked it though- it reminds me of some well-known fanfic authors' writing styles (those of which I haven't seen in a while due to lack of updates.)

It was so sweet. Amazingly written. I actually held my breath halfway through! ;)

I enjoyed reading this a lot! Great job! :D