cliff hanger!

Cliffhangers are evil! Meh, but then, how would writers get readers hooked? As much as I wish cliffhangers have no effect on me, they do, and I hope to see another chapter on the way!

With you it's all or nothing. All for you and nothing for me. But if a wife is wise, she's gotta realize that men like you are wild and free...Oklahoma! (Sorry...)

There are some parts where I expect there to be "s. Like the part that says: Tarrlok! Is she yelling it? Thinking it?

You also need to think about where it is appropriate to use the term "could" instead of "did."

You use a lot of comas. If you were to change your sentences around, they wouldn't be necessary. I think it's important for you to learn different ways to phrase what you want to say.

I apologize if I am being vague. I hope this makes sense. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions.

this...is...AWESOME!

And yeah, suicide?

This is a childrens show!

Well, I even watch it!

And i loved the kiss at the end!

The waited till now and it made me soooo mad!

Keep comtinuing the story!

it is awesome and I love it!

I love this!

Very descriptive and you watch the tv to make sure you are accurate!

Awesome!(:

Oh snap! Love this story. Update soon!

and now the real fun begins!

PLEASE KEEP IT UP, YOUR ON A ROLL ! ;)

Woohoo! Go team avatar!

I can't wait to see where this goes!

WOOH! Go Krew! Go Team Avatar! You teach that sonofabadgermole a lesson!

this is awesome, by the way, and I shall believe this happens till the shws says otherwise and probably longer

Go Team Avatar!

Awesome!(:

.I beg you to PLEASE continue!AMAZING! :D