Please update

*HIMYM and Fairy Tail references detected*

Very good story, can't wait for more!

CARRY ON WITH THIS STORY
IT IS GETTING INTERESTING...
MAKE A HAPPY ENDING...

(Chp 1 review) Your writing quality is good. Almost perfect grammar, only a couple of adverbs I noticed that I would have cut out, and a smooth delivery.

Suggestions for improvement which would probably get you more followers:

What you have here is a story which has both an Alternate Universe and a Original Character within paragraphs from the start. You do this with little explanation or attempt to draw the reader into caring. The result is a confused reader - which has the effect of destroying much of any immersion into the story the reader has developed.

For me I was kicked out of my immersion starting with "Codex Gorsakolel", which I eventually figured out was a made up name (by Googling). I had stopped and was trying to remember where that appeared in the canon story while reading.

The next thing that caused me major problems was the "deal" Hilda made with Oga. Hilda would have zero authority to make that kind of deal for the Demon World. So it seemed way unrealistic that she would even try.

Then we have some OC leader of Beel's army show up with no lead up to allow the reader to get emotionally invested in this character. (I also had to try to figure out if he was canon or not) Furthermore, why is this guy fighting Beel's chosen contractor? And why doesn't Oga get shocked to death when he moves out of range?

Perhaps some of that gets explained in future chapters. But when introducing OCs and writing in an AU, it is critical that you pull the reader into the world you have created without causing confusion right from the start - if you don't you will lose all but your hard core fans.

I'll review more or PM you when I have time to get to the future chapters. (I read the first part of chp 2 and that was good).

You have an interesting plot idea written in excellent English which unfortunately is marred by rushing the reader into unfamiliar territory. A prologue of sort could potentially fix that, or a partial rewrite to fill in the holes.

Definitely a plot twist I never saw coming and of course Oga saves Hilda yet again. Nice chapter. Very interested to see wher this will go. Keep up the good work!

Till next time.

Oookay so let me get this straight: Oga learns that in fact demons are the ones who are scared with humans, and his fan is actually another mystery character with hidden intention for himself and not for this Akephalos or Hilda's rescue team. And there's another demon family who wanted to go against the current king due of the past and hire Akephalos to do the jobs, but what does it have to do with Oga?

More importantly, when will you update? I'm itching to see more of this. Especially because I love OgaxHilda since I knew Beelzebub manga/anime.

The warden is actually Oga's fan? Hilarious! And why does Oga's situation kinda remind me with one of Jean Claude Van-Damme's film where he was accused for something he didn't do and ended up in a prison with meany guys in the mess hall and picked a fight with them.

OgaxHilda of course! Aoi is better with Aiba or Izuma!

Holy smoke indeed! What will happen to Oga then?

:D well not much to say.

Update soon, good chapter.

Followed.

So..Elfman is a demon.
...
Well. Didn't see that coming.

Hmm..an interesting start. I'd like to see where you go with it :D

Nice chapter, and a long one at that. XD Well, I like it's getting heated; and I don't think you should worry too much about introducing too many characters, even if they don't get to do much. After all in life we meet not so important people all the time. :) One thing I wish I had done is properly learning French in high school, I was surprised to find out how much you can forget a language in 2 years if you don't use it. XD Anyway, awesome work!

Wicked story man. I've read a lot of Beelzebub fanfic and this is da bomb :) Continue plz XD