This story hasn't been updated in 4 years... in case aren't really paying attention to written sentence I will write it again.

4 YEARS!

48 MONTHS!

208 WEEKS!

1460 DAYS!

35040 HOURS!

2102400 MINUTES!

1261440 SEDCONDS!

1261440 MILISECONDS!

1261440 NANOSECONDS!

Now that my friend is a HELLUVA of a lot of time.

OH MY GAWD! WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT! oops...sorry was stcuk on CAPS lock. Ah ehehehehe...anyway, damn good story...even makes me envious that I can't come up with something this awesome and awe inspiring. Great job on this.

Hey dude, could you review halo sg-1 for me please because he doesn't take annonomous reviews which really makes me mad because my parents won't let me officaily register [because of virus parinoay] and tell him to take annonomous reviews because I love to review.

While I agree with Teal Thanatos’ statements in some aspects, I must debate several of his points. I agree that the first several chapters are in complete disregard of military protocol but I think aznricechink’s characterization of John makes him much more human. I believe that the “Master Chief” and the SPARTANs introduced in Nylund’s books are extremely lifeless and are no more than talking robots. They are mindless machines that kill on order, as demonstrated with the fight ecounters with the “Helljumpers” in Fall of Reach. There are plenty of good war novels that are able to capture the human aspect of war as well as the strategic part.

In First Strike, Nylund does make an effort to make John seem more human by introducing the “decision to condemn Johnson to death” situation, but even that is extremely cliché and formulaic.

In Nylund’s novels, there is almost no attempt to make the characters alive through detail or description. When I read his works, I had to convince myself that this wasn’t written by a fourth-grader.

The Flood is by far the best novel of the Halo series. The characters actually seem alive because Dietz spends time bringing them to life instead of mindlessly dragging on the plot.

In addition, Cortana is “literally inside” John’s mind, so she can understand what he is thinking.

Yes, some suspense would be nice, but don’t overdo it.

This is why I disagree with citing the Halo works as if they were the Bible of all Halo fanfiction. These novels should be taken as guidelines, not religious law.

If some Halo fanatics took everything said to them as fact, mind control would be very easy.

Despite its shortcomings, this story stands out from most of the crap that is the Halo section.

heh, I was wondering when something like this to turn up, though I'm not surprised. I've read through my own story a couple times before and have been bored outta my mind by it. pretty stupid. well, I did write most of it when I was 10, 11-ish and had no idea what "military protocol" even meant, much less understand the books. therefore, it turned out to be a piece of crap.

anyways, to the real reason I'm writing this...Chapter 13 (most likely) will not be finished. this is for a variety of reasons, schoolwork, it was crap, blah blah...well, sorry to anybody who really wanted to read it, but I'm working on a fic for Halo 2, which is probably going to be quite a bit better (hopefully). don't look for it anytime soon; I'm a natural procrastinator and have very little time besides that. probably going to work on it a lot during Christmas break. I'll finish it earlier if I can.

y0

Pretty dissapointed by your story, first off the behaviour of the characters is totally out of character, the Master Chief (which you don't even bother typing out) breaks millitary protocol every ten seconds and fights in a very odd manner which is nothing like the game or the books.

Further, his speach skills are also atrophied from the books and game, his normal close mouthed behaviour has seemingly vanished into thin air, along with the credibility of your story.

“No, wait! It’s me, the Chief! And Cortana! We’re sending identification data now. Hold your fire!”

Why the hell did he get into that situation in the first place? it's not something that would happen with adherence to millitary protocol. In Halo 2 when the Master Chief arrives in earthspace via the forerunner built-convenant piloted ship he immediately communicates to stop himself being fired upon, and lo & behold, he is not fired upon.

One other thing, Cortana doesn't read the Master Chief's thoughts, she resides in an interface between his neural pathways and the suit, directly processing his commands to his own body and inputting them to the suits interface for faster and more accurate reactions.

Your story also has no suspense, the closest it ever comes to suspense is when he could taste blood in his helmet, and even then it's pretty lame. Especially him having time to yell at cortana, let her process an answer and then reply, counter reply and run all during a fire fight.

in other words, your fight scenes truly are not up to par. Take the time to read the books again (dear gods I do hope you have read them) and try to emulate the writing style somewhat, if not the style, at least the behaviour of the characters.

Apart from that, I was impressed with the word count of the story and the lack of obvious problems spelling and grammar wise.

Good luck and I hope you don't take this personally.

Teal

UM yummy story...been following this for awhile and it's "yummy" please update fast! please! only 3 more days until halo 2

Hey man. I believe you. I didn't think about checking the publish date thingie. As I said before, sorry that I wrongly accused you. Now since I know you didn't do it on purpose I can make an actualy review. I only had time to read the first chapter cuz i have to watch a movie soon but it was pretty good. I certainly enjoyed it. Just the fact that you came up with basically the same storyline as the Bungie team and Eric Nylund is pretty cool. I congradulate you on your imagination. I was sort of thinking along those lines b4 First Strike came out. I'll review the story when i'm done. Sorry.

i gave a review explain this issue on one of your stories, "Link's adventure on Halo."

if any of you still have doubts leave another review.

-aznricechink54

Hey dude, no offense intended but your story is a complete rip off of First Strike by Eric Nylund. I mean, i've only read the first chapter but even just taking the idea is plagiarism. The summary made me thing "wow, that sounds just like First Strike" which I just happen to be reading right now. And I agree with every other criticizm that other ppl wrote because I think you derserve to be put down. And by the way this review is assuming you had read or heard of the plot of First Strike. If you honestly did not plagiarize than ignore this and forget about me.

dude, how can you leave me hanging like that? ah i hope you uptate soon your story's been great.

great story...hope u continue it :)

Update you can't leave me hangin like this.

Hey! Where's the rest? _ I like it alot! Keep up the good work and I'll be doing a full review when the last chapter is put up. _

Why would they hesitate to blow an elites brains out? Its fookin hilarious!

1. and, shouldn't human soldiers have infa-red goggles with them? they had them on halo, when a group of invisi-lites invaded the main base. They shouldv'e used those