Well here is another attempt at writing a Romance Oregairu fanfiction. Sorry if its seems too OOC or if it doesn't seem to fit the Oregairu world cause I'm writing off the top of my head. I'm trying to make it to be more like Oregairu but don't count on it being consistent.

Its hurts like hell.

Expectations.

Before all this you could say I had very little of it

You could say it's my safe guard for despair and hopelessness.

You'll find that more often than not our expectations and dreams fail us, leaving us in a pit of unhappiness. You find it all the time; from relationships to work to school.

In that case it's simple see that if you had no expectations (or at the very least very low ones) you won't find yourself disappointed. In which case if you find that your low expectations are exceeded then you'll find yourself pleasantly surprised. If not well then you can say to yourself "well that was expected."

Of course this kind of talk is would easily be labelled as the talk of losers and to winners "defeatist talk". Obviously as a loner I don't care about what other people think. However at this current point in time, in this service club room, despite not wishing for it seems that I would have to re-think about this simple but in this case out dated thinking.

"I love you."

And with a tone akin to that of an unused nervous quality she repeated herself once more.

"I love you." Repeated the long raven haired girl in front of me.

I couldn't help but think whether I had found myself the protagonist of a harem anime, where for reasons unexplainable girls of all personalities flocked to the ridiculous dense main character.

But of course this was reality and the reality of it was that for reasons unexplained Yukino Yukinoshita had confessed to me of all people.

Did I miss obvious signs?

Was I even supposed to see?

Was it a spur of the moment decision on her part?

"Was that even possible?"

"Was she lying?"

All these questions rushed through my head and more.

I started to tremble. My fist clenched tightly.

How am I supposed to react?

"Why am I scared?" I whispered.

"What do I say?"

"You don't have to tell me anything, Hikigaya-kun. I just want to tell you before graduation." Yukinoshita Yukino responded.

"Are you leaving?" I asked

"No. I simply felt that it was…..appropriate." Yukinoshita Yukino responded.

"Are you just happy with that? Just to tell me?"

"Yes it's fine. I'm not expecting much out of you Hikigaya-kun."

"That's just like you."

"No I would like to think that somehow I got that from you. I swear that your thinking has got to me somehow, improbable as it seems."

"Is that why you love me?"

She shook her head.

"It's a bit more complicated than that and words can't express how much I love you. All I know that I find myself happy with you."

She turned to leave the clubroom.

"Wait where are you going?!" I retorted.

"Club activities are over Hikigaya-kun. At least for today. We still have sometime before graduation, so don't worry." Yukino re-assured.

"That's not what I meant!" I shouted.

"There isn't anything left to talk about Hikigaya-kun. I've said what I needed to say for today. We can talk about this soon. Plus I suspect that you might need to do some thinking." Yukinoshita replied.

She left the room as graceful as she appeared before me today. In stark contrast I sank in to my usual chair.

Unable to process it at face value I continued to churn out theories, conspiracies, plots. But they were my coward's mind way of ignoring the real problem at hand. There was no way that the Yukinoshita Yukino would lie. Since there was no way in which Yukinoshita Yukino could ever not be Yukinoshita Yukino, this singular truth remained. In that case all plots and theories that relied on her deception where futile. They were mere distractions to the truth I needed to seek.

"Do I love Yukinoshita Yukino?" I muttered loudly.

The door burst open. To see the disturber of my thoughts I turned around. I found one of the last people that I wanted to see in this current situation; Yui Yuigahama

"So I didn't mishear." She whispered quietly.

Crap was she here the whole time? I've got to stop this-

"So Yukinon on the same boat as me huh?"

"No wait I think she's one step ahead. She's amazing isn't she? She's able to be so sure of herself…" Yuigahama continued then trailed off.

"And I haven't even confessed yet…." She begun.

I wasn't stupid. I had realised that she had feelings for me. It was another thing that was different from harem protagonists. I needed to stop this… But what for? Wasn't I simply being selfish at this time? Even so I tried to stop her from doing something I feared she may regret.

"Yuigahama. Stop. Don't. Don't do this please." I implored selfishly.

"Hikki. I'm sorry. It's probably the last thing you want to hear today but I have to tell you!" She declared strengthening her resolve.

She stared at me with her new resolved eyes.

"I love you. Hm. That's right, I love you. I've had these feelings for a long time, Hachiman. Ever since you saved Sable, I felt a connection to you and as we continued to be together in the service club my feelings continued to develop." Yuigahama confessed.

She began to blush, she turned on her heels and proceeded to leave the room in a rush. Leaving me to wallow in my own thoughts alone once more.

"Wasn't this a love triangle?" I asked to no one in particular.

At that moment Hiratsuka Shizuka, my homeroom teacher, club advisor, senpai in life but about equal in romance.

"Yes. That's right new romance manga protagonist; Hikigaya Hachiman." Hiratsuka sensei replied.

"Don't mock me sensei. This is reality, not a manga." I bit back.

"So defensive….Oh well I can take that as a good thing. So what are you gonna do about it?"

I look at her with sullen eyes.

"Manipulating people to do what I need them to do or to make them realise something that they have ignored is simple; a few words to crack their ego, a few words in the right direction, information manipulation, common enemy building and I have my answer." I responded

"Ugh. Its scares me that you can spout those sorts of things so easily." Hiratsuka mentioned while shuddering.

"But for this situation, I can't do that. When the answer to my questions and the resolution to the problem lies within myself, well I find myself at a dead end. If the answer I need is within myself well that's much harder to find. As someone who can't tell you the meaning of friendship how would I even be able to ask myself whether I love either of them and even more than that whether I'll even be able to recognise that irrational emotion called love. I don't know how to handle the situation so that I'll leave the both of them happy….."

"Hachiman. This situation doesn't call for rationality. I hope that you've realised that." She told me with a stern look on her face.

Her expression melted.

"Honestly I'm slightly jealous of you right now. At least you can worry about these things. But I'll put those feelings aside for this one moment and give you my advice." Sensei declared.

She grabbed my shoulders and looked me straight in the eye.

"Hachiman, this situation as you've realised it already isn't a rational problem. In that case forget you're about your head. Cut off you're rationality from its root. Forget about calculating, plan making, damage reduction, countermeasures, ego breaking and all the rest of the things that you've used up to this time. Forget about hurting anybody at this current point in time. Humans by nature are greedy people, even when they seem like the most selfless you can almost be certain that their doing for some ulterior motive."

"Uh sensei. Aren't you leaning a bit too close to um…. Corruption?" I questioned as she leaned closer and closer.

"Focus! Look the point is that this problem as you say is about you. Or more specifically your happiness. At this point in time, and especially at this point in your life you've got to be selfish. It's an unfortunate world that happiness is born solely from unhappiness and unfortunate struggle. But that's the price we pay for that happiness. So look for it Hachiman! Your happiness! You've spent this past year and a half being essentially one of the most selfless students I know. You deserve it. So be a little selfish."

"Essentially look here and nowhere else." She declared as she pointed to my chest.

"Isn't that a typical line from a shounen manga?" I inquire.

"Hey! Shounen manga can teach good life lessons okay! I mean friendship, justice, happiness, the future….." Hiratsuka began as she started to count all the themes that she could pull.

"I take it that this is gonna be one of the last lessons you'll ever teach me?"

"Yes. So take it to heart okay!" She exclaimed as she started to leave me.

"Thanks. It's not every day but thanks sensei." I thank.

She didn't look back but nodded and raise her hands in agreement as she left me to my own devices.

This is going to be long day….

Having nothing to do I trudged back home, hoping that I could at least be comfortable whilst thinking over the situation I was in. Adjusting my wonky blazer slightly to make myself look presentable to the family. Slowly I opened the door

"I'm home." I repeat for the millionth time.

"Oh Onii-chan! Welcome back. Alright day? Feeling regretful over lost opportunities yet?" Komachi asked inquisitively.

"You know that those sorts of questions aren't cute right? And you know that I don't regret." I responded curtly.

"Yeah yeah. "To regret is to reject your past self". I've heard it before nii-chan." Komachi bemoaned.

She walked up to me and inspected my face. Oi your Onii-chan isn't a statue in an art gallery.

"Disregarding that. Did something happen Onii-chan?"

Is my imouto an esper? Ah no she must have spectator or something… How the hell can see get that from looking just at my face.

"Gotcha! Look, look that face you made after I said that told me everything I needed. High points! Entering double points round!" Komachi exclaimed.

Komachi your brother isn't a round of quiz up or whose wants to be a millionaire.

"Nii-chan. enough of the muttering okay. Tell me what happened." She demanded.

"Your nii-chan has reach new heights in the past afternoon. I have received not one but two confessions."

"Ehh! How!? That's impossible. For onii-chan to have such an opportunity like that!?" Komachi cried out.

"See onii-chan has charm points Komachi. Subtle ones yes but there nonetheless."

She seemed to accept it reasonable quickly. That's my imouto for you! We share a great bond.

"So who are they? Who's the lucky one nii-chan!" Komachi begged.

I suspect that my eyes turned sullen at that point in time.

"That's the reason for my distress Komachi. Its Yukinoshita and Yuigahama. I haven't chosen either and I'm struggling to find out who to choose. "

"I see. I see. You know onii-chan. You're much nicer than you think you are. You're obviously worrying about them as well right? Anyways Komachi supports you fully. Komachi approves!" She declared as she stuck her thumb as a sign of support.

I sighed. As much as I would like to her support doesn't save me much burden. All it does help with is the introductions to the family. Wait why I am I thinking of this now! I've got an immediate problem to solve now.

"Nii-chan! I trust you okay! Ponder the depths of your heart for a bit! Since you've pretty much gotten into a good university with a scholarship you can worry about your "girl problems" all you want! I'll cook dinner so ponder deeply kay!" Komachi declared.

I left the living room and entered my basic bedroom, dropped my bad somewhere and flopped onto the bed. At that point in time I realised something important!

Wasn't I'll acting a lot like a riajuu now?! With the whole worrying about a girlfriend thing and the flopping on to bed like I'm a teenager in heat. Ahh screw it! It's no time to be acting like this now.

Feeling around my bed, the mattress suddenly became much warmer and more comfortable…

Ugh…Crap…..Can't focus…..gotta sleep for a bit….

High rise apartment- Yukino Yukinoshita's apartment.

Ugh. Was that really necessary? Did I have to tell him? What sort of demon possessed me at that time? Why tell him of feelings that I have no idea how to express anyway?

Unlocking the door to my apartment became a whole lot harder all of a sudden. My arms weighed far heavier than normal. This feeling isn't particularly pleasant.

Inspecting the room and finding everything as I had left it I flopped to the nearest chair. Thoughts weighing things down.

""I wasn't looking for an answer." That's got to be the first lie I've made." I muttered to myself.

Of course I wanted answer. I was still a girl, who still loves a boy the same way as the rest.

But of course he'd realise that I'd want one. He's just that good. Maybe it's one of the reasons why I like him.

I'm being selfish aren't I?

I who hasn't realised the root cause of all of this, have imposed on the one I supposedly love a heavy burden. I had noticed briefly that Yuigahama-san was there listening as well. I can't imagine the pain I've caused to the both of them.

But I suppose wallowing in it won't help. I've laid all my cards out on the table. I just need to see what the lies in the future and see whether I can't sort my jumbled feelings into an expressible form.

RING, RING!

Walking up to the voice com and pressing the talk button I heard a familiar voice.

"Yukinon. It's me. Can we talk?" echoed the voice of Yuigahama Yui, my friend of sorts and since starting from this evening-love rivals or at least that's what normally the relationship of two girls who liked the same guy.

I opened the door. An awkward silence came in. It seems like she had been trying to pick up the courage to speak to me.

"Yukinon. I just want to say congratulations for confessing to him."

"It's nothing that deserves applaud." I tell her.

"I've probably hurt people in this act of mine. He and you included." I mentioned.

"No. No. No. Don't worry about me Yukinon! I've done my bit as well. I confessed not long after you. So we are on equal standings now!"

"So officially we are now love rivals!" Yuigahama declared.

"You're quite an amazing person Yuigahama-san. You can still remain cheerful at a time like this. Even though the chances are our friendship would be ruined-"

"Stop! Don't say another word. Don't make me feel guiltier Yukinon. I'm just as happy as I can be…..When your opponent is somehow you admire well its best to stay positive!" She declared.

"You're a worthy opponent Yuigahama-san. Even worthier than me is some respects…." I trailed off

"Anyways! That's all I wanted to tell you! See you tomorrow!" She farewelled.

I closed the door behind her and sighed.

This hurts far too much. Love is all spice and sweetness. Don't give me that crap. Clutching my chest I thought of only one thing…..

It hurts like hell…

As she closed the door behind me and the dull thud of the door echoed distantly in my ear, my tears began to flow.

"Yukinon. I'm sorry…. I lied…It hurts like hell." I whispered.

Hmm. I'm actually quite pleased on how it turned out. I had a few doubts but it turned out okay at least. Hopefully that set the story nicely. Be prepared for a bit of conflict, soul searching and above all some love. Hopefully I can do these characters justice but let's see about that. Anyway review and like if you enjoyed it. Feedback welcome and necessary!

AsheriteAbyss13-coming to a computer near you.