Gloria Contritum SSHG

A SS/HG fanfic by Severus Sortiarius

A/N:I OWN NOTHING, This is for my amusement and others if you feel so incline to venture with me...The Characters and all rights Belong to J.K. Rowling, but I like to venture into her playground...particularly when it comes to a certain Potions Master...No Money is being made off this...and I'm quite alright with that...Stress relief and letting my imagination run wild is all I care about here...and of course Reviews...I'll try and watch my spelling but it does tend to go awry in the heat of the moment when typing so bare with me...RATED M and it's not changing...I won't be as descriptive as some other writers out of respect to the characters, but I will make them HUMAN.

{A/N: This is another dark one, you've been warned}

{Following an attack by both Voldemort and Nagini, Severus Snape finds himself at the crossroads hovering between life and death. He is given the chance to go back through his youth before he makes the hasty decision to move on at the behest of Albus Dumbledore...certain that his miserable life held no significance for anyone other than those that used him for their own means...Snape takes him up on his offer...}

{"I'm not awake. I'm slowly burning away...I'm not OK. I'm falling flat on my face...Down on the pavement, I'm fighting the weight...I'm not awake. I'm slowly burning away...Sometimes I feel like I can't wake up!...I'm trying to breathe...I wanna let go, so I can feel again...} Slowburn Rev Theory

WARNING: Contains Mature Content...M FOR MATURE,

My thanks to all my Readers and Reviewers...Enjoy-S.S.

Prologue: When Venom Burns Slow

The Shrieking Shack, Hogwarts Grounds, Scotland...

Tears continued to stream down the sallow pale cheeks of a figure clad in ebony robes amid the old wooden floor boards in the old shack that had been on the grounds of the most prestigious school in the entire Wizarding World. The usually cold obsidian eyes that had shed them had seen their fair share of pain of torment. A life time's worth if one was truly honest. There were so many faces. So many dark places that not even the most well versed witch or wizard had known about within this world that use to spell safety to the dying wizard.

His raven hair had been soaked at the ends from the blood gushing freely from the wound about his pale neck. The warmth of it's sticky crimson mixed in with the cooling air of shack. Outside the battle for the fate of the wizarding world had been taking place. One last battle in the lengthy two term war that the dying wizard had been fighting for much of his young life.

As his breaths became more shallow and the coldness set in his weary mind drifted back to the miserable life that had been granted to him. He had no wife to mourn him or any children of his own to carry on his name. His bloodline would end here on the floor as forgotten as the wizard himself once the outcome of the war had been decided.

He had given his life to Hogwarts.

It seemed fitting that he died there.

He would have smiled at the irony in the notion that a poor, muggle raised, half-blood like him would become the Headmaster of such a prominent school. He had been teaching her since he was in his early twenties and now not even out of his thirties he would die here. The numbness of the poison had started working. He could feel it in his toes as the sensation ceased all too slowly.

At least he wouldn't have to suffer the cold for long.

The last thing he had seen other than the interior of the dingy little shack had been the emerald green eyes of the boy he swore to protect. The boy whom all his fighting and planning had been for. Harry James Potter.

Twisted irony so cruel in its perception had placed the child of one of the few men he hated more than he had ever loved anyone in his entire life under his protection. James Potter had taken the one person for whom he would do anything for. In a sense he had taken his life and any hope for a better future.

The dying wizard had long thought he had died that Hollows Eve night 17 years prior when he looked into Lily Evans-Potter's lifeless emerald green eyes and it seemed his body was finally catching up.

A final twinge of pain.

The fair well portion most likely as the venom reached his slow beating heart.

His ebony clad chest rose and fell in slow breaths growing slower still.

The sounds of battle had been nothing more than fireworks at a going away party by now.

At the final moment the dying wizard grew puzzled when he noted the sorrowful look on Miss Granger's face. She had not taken her eyes off him until Weasley pulled her from the room for fear of approaching death eaters. The whole scene had been so pathetic in his mind. He could only imagine what nonsense The Daily Prophet would say after he was gone.

Revererd Hogwarts Headmaster Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore's murderer Headmaster Severus Sebastian Snape dead at 38. Death eater Headmaster and former Head of Slytherin was reportedly killed by a serpent, the emblem for which his respective Hogwarts house represents. He was said to be surrounded by sentimental Gryffindors at the time.

He would have laughed at that. Had he not been losing consciousness. The miserable life of Severus Sebastian Snape came to an end on a lonely wood floor in a forgotten shack that had nearly been the sight of his demise at the age of 16. More twisted irony for the masses. No one would mourn the passing of a murderous death eater like him. He had been called heartless and cruel. To many he had been nothing more than a bully and they'd be happy to be well rid of him. Given his hand in the murder of Albus Dumbledore his death was as much a boon as Voldemort's demise was perceived to be during the first war.

Not one soul would shed a tear for the wear man clad in ebony that once inhabited the dungeons. There was a portrait commission to be painted of him for the Headmaster's office. He doubted it would see the light of day, perhaps they would use it to decorate an empty cell in Azkaban.

Without much ceremony Severus Snape's world became nothing. No pain. No memories. No life.

"Severus." said a familiar pleasant voice. "Of course someone will mourn you."

Choosing to keep his pale eyelids closed in a bid to rush his inevitable death Snape tried to ignore the familiarity of the voice that called to him.

"Severus." it said again.

Annoyed that even on the brink of death he could have no peace his obsidian eyes sprang open and he came face to dace with none other than Albus Dumbledore, his victim and former employer.

"There are plenty of people who have loved you Severus." he said in his usual pleasant tone. "You just never paid any attention to them...your self loathing had gotten in the way."

"Sod off old man." snapped the dying wizard. "Save your Gryffindor delusions for someone that cares...I know what I am."

"Do you?" asked Dumbledore with an arched eyebrow.

"Yes." replied Snape in an icy tone. "I am your murderer."

"That is not true and you know it." said the older wizard in a pleasant tone.

"What isn't true about it?" asked Snape still icy. "I cast the curse...I took your life...you are dead because of me."

Dumbledore sighed.

"I see it is going to take quite a bit of work to convince you." he said.

It was Snape's turn to arch an eyebrow though it had been painfully so and with a good deal of effort. The poison was being pumped all through him but at a surprisingly slower rate. No doubt the old coot's doing.

"Convince me of what?" he asked.

"That there is someone that cares for you...my boy." said Dumbledore. "That there is still a reason to fight."

"You're wasting your time old man." said Snape bitterly. "There is no such person."

Dumbledore consider this a moment and then sighed.

"I'll make you a wager then." he said.

This seemed to peak Snape's interest. It wasn't as if there was anything else going on and his death was mighty slow.

"You have my attention." he said in his usual baritone drawl.

"I propose we view your so called "miserable" life and see if we can find such a person." said Dumbledore. "If there is even but one life that you have managed to touch with your existence then you are to take up one last fight for that person's sake."

"And if you cannot find such a person?" asked Snape.

"Then you are welcome to a peaceful end without any more interference from me." said Dumbledore.

Snape considered this. He could have just said no and let the venom take him, But the curiosity of this one person's identity peeked his interest.

"You have a deal." said Snape.

"Thank you my boy." said Dumbledore with an eerie twinkle behind his familiar blue eyes.

Apparently he had not lost the ability to unnerve him even in death.

The next thing Snape knew he was rapidly losing consciousness but it wasn't the familiar blanket of death. It was magic that had caused this, strong and ancient magic.

What Dumbledore had in store for him he would soon find out.