A/N:

Wow it has been forever. And I severely apologize about the delay. Very long story short, I hurt my arm very badly and had to get surgery and everything. Then it still didn't want to heal correctly and was healing very slowly so I had to leave my job and move and yupp just a mess... anyway arm is starting to heal now and is finally at a point where i can type again! So I am so excited and it is time for our story to continue!

Anyway,

Still don't own the song but had to reuse it, you'll see why.

Chapter 20: Worth It

Elizabeth's POV

What would have normally been considered a calm and peaceful night, pregnancy had turned into an obnoxious nightmare. I lay in bed tossing and turning, staring at the ceiling, then the wall, then the door, and then the cieling again... hoping my body would eventually succumb to sleep.

As the baby grew within me sleeping became a difficult chore. Finding a good sleeping position felt impossible and sometimes if I even did manage to do that the baby would refuse to settle, kicking me from a drowsy, barely conscious state back to being almost wide awake.

I looked at Will, peaceful beside me as his chest slowly moved up and down as he breathed in and out. I supposed most pregnant women would perhaps envy and perhaps resent their husbands peaceful sleep when they couldn't find sleep themselves, possibly even waking them for the sake of company. I, on the other hand, was happy to see him sleeping so calmly and did everything in my power to keep it that way. Will didn't always sleep well especially since Jones had returned. While the man still hung above the mast, the knowledge that one wrong move on Jack's behalf could cause him to go free which likely meant the demise of our family, often kept Will awake at night. While I could forgive him for leaving Jones to roam the seas instead of ferrying him to the afterlife, Will seemed to have quite the trouble forgiving himself.

I knew he was also stressed about Henry and was certain that also contributed to him staying up late so often. He wanted to be the father Henry had never had and he was, in my opinion, doing an excellent job at such, but sometimes I knew he doubted himself. Henry was of course apprehensive about the new baby and how that would affect Will's relationship with him and while the new baby presently remained inside me, Will was soaking up as much time with Henry as he could. They would often play games like "Nine Men's Morris" and "Liars Dice" together. I smiled at the thought of him teaching Henry "Nine Men's Morris" remembering a much, much younger Will Turner playing it with me when we were children. I beat him almost every single time.

Quietly, so as not to disturb Will, I got out of bed, giving up on my attempt at sleep and left out the door of our small cabin to go atop the ship. During the day, i wore an old man's shirt and trousers, as my own dress I had brought with me no longer fit. I darent ask where the clothes had come from, not being sure I wanted to know where exactly the crew had precured them assuming likely whatever had happened to their old owner was not necessarily a pleasant tale.

At night, in the comfort of my own bed with Will, I often wore only the top and tonight was no different. It was a longer top and covered more than just the upper half of my body and even though it's length was still shorter than any dress anyone other than a harlot wouldn't be caught dead in, not wanting to risk waking Will, I left my trousers behind and heading above deck in just the shirt anyway. I figured it was still decent enough to not be too immodest.

As I walked above deck, I noticed Carina and Henry a distance away towards my right and both Jack and Philip a distance away towards my left.

Looking again towards Carina and Henry while they would arguidbly make more pleasurable company, I decided not to disturb them. Carina was leaned against Henry, resting her entire upper body on him and Henry's arm was wrapped around her in return. Carina's head rested on his shoulder and Henry's head was placed gently on top of hers. I noticed Carina laugh at something Henry said as she gently pulled her head back and eyed him almost seductively.

Seeing that I almost wondered if I should interrupt them. Then I tried to remember what Will had said to me earlier. Henry was growing up and I had to accept that. One would expect Will to be the one struggling to let his son grow up, having missed most of his childhood, but it was I who struggled. I could lie and say I didn't want to see him get hurt by Carina, and that may be true but that wasn't what really worried me.

No, if I were truly honest with myself, I didn't want to let my little boy go. I had struggled when he'd first left home, but even then I knew he'd always come back between trips. I now suspected what I believe both overjoys and scares every mother. My boy was going to be leaving home alright, likely soon, and this time he wouldn't be coming back. He'd be leaving to start a life and family of his own. While a joyful thought, it was also a painful one. And that was something I had trouble even admitting to Will.

I sighed watching Henry lean in slowly to kiss Carina. I was losing him. It was obvious he now loved another woman more than his mother. It was only right this day would come. It was healthy, normal, to be expected. It wasn't that I wasn't happy for him. It wasn't that I didn't like Carina. It wasn't that I didn't believe this really was for the best and a joyous thing... it was that it was hard.

I sighed. Now I almost wished Will was awake. I was finally admitting these feelings to myself now and as I processed them I began to wish he was there just to have a human to speak to about these things. I contemplating going back under deck and walking him, but I couldn't, not after how long he'd gone without proper sleep worrying about Jones or Henry or the new baby or me. I smiled to myself, Will didn't need to worry about me. I was completely capable of taking care of myself, I thought I'd quite proven that while he had been gone all those years, but it was still nice to have a husband around to worry about me for a change.

My smile deepened as I thought about how nice it was to even have the option to wake my husband up to speak to him. How many nights had I found myself awake while pregnant with Henry, contemplating all sorts of things, wishing my husband had been there to contemplate said things with or to calm my wandering mind? Now he was with me. Now I could choose to go back to my room and wake him. I continued smiling as I placed a hand on my constantly growing baby bump. "You've know idea how lucky you are to have a father nearby little one," I whispered.

I looked up, hearing Jack speaking rather loudly though it wasn't quite in a yelling tone to Philip.

"You know what love does?" he asked, clearly intoxicated, though that was nothing new. "Ruins ya. Destroys ya. Makes ya weak. I personally avoid it best I can."

I walked towards them. Arguing with Jack always seemed like a pleasant alternative to rolling around in bed without a chance at real sleep. Although he honestly did annoy me sometimes, I had to admit sometimes arguing with him was amusing to say the least. Deep in his heart Jack wasn't a terrible person. He was an idiot, but a good man nonetheless... most of the time anyway.

"I disagree," Philip said calmly, looking to the sea as though he clearly couldn't be bothered to hear whatever Jack had to say.

"Sad isn't it?" Jack asked in my direction seeing me near him. I noticed him look me up and down quickly and slightly regretted my choice to forego my trousers for my long shirt instead. I didn't say anything though as his gaze stopped on my face and stayed there. At least he was trying to be decent.

" What's sad about love?" I asked, answering Jack.

Jack walked closer to me and thus just out of earshot of Philip he whispered, "Welp thinks the singing will bring his mermaid back. Meanwhile the breaking of all curses means she wont even hear it. Tried to tell him that. Doesn't believe me."

"Can't say I blame him," I sighed, "If singing could have brought Will back when he was gone I would have never stopped."

Jack squenched his face. "You know once Lizzie..."

"Elizabeth," I corrected.

"I almost found myself in love," he continued, ignoring my correction, "Quickly regretted that. Don't recommend it. A man's one and only love should be his ship."

"Are you talking about Alva?" I questioned.

Jack looked taken aback. "Yes," he quickly sputtered, "Of course. Who else?" He grinned as he held up his rum to offer it to me.

I don't know why, but a part of me sensed perhaps he hadn't been speaking of just Alva.

Shrugging his offer of the rum I turned to face towards Philip who had now walked back to the edge of the ship to get a more direct view of the sea he constantly starred towards. I watched as his lips began to part and knew even before his tune became audible that he was singing again in hopes that his lover would hear once more.

"Can you blame him for hoping though?" I asked more as rhetorical question.

"Did I ever tell you Lizzie..."

"Elizabeth," I corrected again, cutting Jack off.

"Elizabeth," he nodded, "Well at least we're past the Mrs. Turner then, eh?"

"For now," I warned. I was opening up to Jack more than I perhaps had at the beginning of our journey. He was still a dangerous man who's allegiances could change at any given moment to suit his own best interests, but he had been kind to Henry and helped get us as far as we'd got. He also had kept true to his word and left Jones hanging from the mast still. That and Will had been right about what he'd said months earlier; I was hard on Jack. I did in part blame him for everything that had happened to Will when really he had been the one who had saved Will's life. I had once, a long time ago, considered the man a friend, perhaps I could once again. Stress the word perhaps though. I still had quite a few doubts about him.

"Aye," Jack smiled, "You know Elizabeth. Love is a complicated matter... there was once a woman other than Alva you know..."

"If you say it's me, I swear I'll kill you right here."

Jack laughed. "You think far too highly of yourself, luv."

I grinned and rolled my eyes.

"Know what I did with her?" Jack asked.

"The woman you loved?"

"Aye," he grinned, swigging more rum, "I drove her to such madness that I left her aboard a deserted island with nothing but a pistol. That way no one can be breaking any hearts or be driven mad by love."

"A real gentleman," I sarcastically remarked, rolling my eyes again.

"Aye," he shrugged, drinking again, "Left her a pistol, that was pretty gentleman-like."

"You ever regret it?" I asked, honestly wondering.

He responded far too quickly. "Not a bit. Captain Jack Sparrow flies better solo. You know what love does, it weaken you."

"Some would say it strengthens you, having someone else there to back you up, to vent to, someone to care about."

"Someone to argue with, someone to drag you down, someone your enemies can use against you."

I shrugged. I knew we wouldn't be agreeing on this. There was really no point in continue to argue it through.

"Then I fell in love with the selkie!" Jack exclaimed, taking another drink.

"I remember that," I remarked.

"Selkies make excellent lovers you know."

" Yes," I replied, sarcastically, "Right up to the point where they kill you."

Jack shrugged. "If love is responsible for killing men anyway might as well go down with a woman who makes you feel the way a selkie does, at least up to the death point."

"Love doesn't kill men."

"If love doesn't kill men, Jack argued, "What did your husband die for? Why does your son wear that thing around his neck? Why did Barbossa willingly plunge at Salazar with a knife, knowing full well he wouldn't survive only to save his daughter?"

I stood silent, biting my lip, unsure how to respond.

"Love is the one thing that makes a man willingly sacrifice himself for someone else without a second thought to it," Jack argued, "Love kills."

I watched Jack take another sip of his rum and for once I almost felt myself feeling bad for him. Love was responsible for many bad things that had happened to my family as well as others, but I couldn't believe it was all bad. Love had brought heartache, but it had also brought feelings I didn't even know I could feel in both my affection for Will and Henry. It had brought joy beyond belief. I smiled feeling the baby kick in my belly and realized just how much good love could bring thinking of my unborn child as well.

"It's worth it," I said to Jack.

" What?" he asked.

"Love is worth it."

Almost as soon as the words left my mouth, I suddenly heard loud singing from beyond the other side of the ship closer to where Philip was located. It wasn't his singing this time though, it much more beautiful and in tune than his own singing had been. Also, it was that of a female.

"Long ago, years ago!" The woman's voice sung beautifully in perfect pitch,

"Growing soft as an ember,

Things my heart use to know,

Things I long remember."

Philip joined the voice in a duet for the last line as a mermaid rose above in the wave to the side of the ship, the water rising with her, but only where she lay,

"And a song someone sings,

From a time I remember."

"Serena!" Philip yelled their song having finished, as he reached towards her and embraced her.

My heart lightened and I smiled, realizing this mermaid was clearly his missing lover. Carina and Henry rose in the commotion and they jumped up and began to walk towards us as well.

"Worth it," I whispered to Jack.

Jack shrugged and took another swig of his rum, unmoved by the beautiful scene playing out before us.

"Is she...," Henry asked, as him and Carina joined us.

"His missing fish?" Jack asked, filling in the gap.

Carina scoffed at him before I got the chance. "The missing woman he's in love with," she corrected.

I smiled towards her. I liked this young girl whom my son had chosen. I liked how she also wasn't afraid to correct Jack. She almost reminded me of a younger version of myself.

Henry stammered, "I... I was going to ask why she was naked but I suppose that will do too."

"Dont get too excited now," Carina grinned, teasing.

I grinned, rolling my eyes. Maybe I had brought him up too conservatively...

"I didn't mean," he awkwardly replied, trying to redeem himself, "I've just never... Why is... Why isn't she wearing a top? "

"Just enjoy it," Jack shrugged.

I lightly hit his side, hard enough to make my point though.

Carina eyed Jack, clearly unimpressed as well.

Jack grinned. "Mermaid," he explained to Henry, growing serious again. Then grinning he met my own gaze once more. "Elizabeth did you know there was once a time when Henry saw Carina's ankles?"

I sighed. I didn't care about some ankles. I did care about the point Jack was clearly trying to make and that he was making it here and with Henry present.

"The pure indecency," Jack continued, "Did your mother bring you up a pig?"

"Mother, I swear it wasn't like that," Henry protested.

I sighed again this time at the ridiculousness of it all. They were just ankles. Maybe I really had brought my son up to be a little too proper...

"I'd never intentionally diminish Carina's honor," he continued.

"I know," I said.

"It wasn't..." he continued.

"Henry, it's fine. I'm not upset."

Henry nodded almost awkwardly.

"Carina are you upset?" he asked.

"No," she shook her head, her face puzzled.

In the background Philip and Serena's reunion and embrace was turning into a very passionate kiss.

"Lets leave them be," I suggested. It was after all for my sake that they had been separated, the least I could do was help give them some privacy. Henry and Carina had worked together to destroy the trident, thus ending Philip's ability to live and breathe with the mermaids, for the sake of Will's freedom. If not for us they never would have been separated. I dreaded to think of what would happen after their reunion. They still wouldn't be able to stay together. I didn't think Serena could live with us on the ship and Philip still remained unable to breath underwater to join her. No, it seemed in all likelihood this reunion of theirs was merely temporarily and my heartached on their behalf over it. I still stood by my earlier words though. It was worth it. Love was worth the trials and separation and pain. Love was always worth it. Yet, I still found myself feeling incredibly guilty about everything.

We had barely begun to walk away when Philip came running towards the four of us. "There's trouble! We have to help!" he yelled.

"Help with what?" Carina asked.

" The mermaids!" Philip screamed, "Since all curses have been ended the mermaids cursed singing does nothing. Sailors don't respond to it. It can no longer be used to bring the sailors to their death and they've taken to hunting mermaids instead. The navy will pay a great price for anyone willing to capture one then when someone does capture one the navy kills them. They wants control of the sea and for people to stop believing in mythological nonsense. They feels myths and mermaids take away from naval power."

I sighed. "So it seems the navy shall be our enemies once again." This was far from the first time we'd fought them. They had never won and never would.

"Indeed," Carina agreed between clenched teeth.

Jack frowned. "Doesn't bloody change anything now does it?"

"No," I sighed, "But it does mean we will have to go off course for a bit and help defend the mermaids."

" Yes," Philip exclaimed, "Please do!"

"No, no, no, no," Jack argued, waving his arms, "Go and defend the mermaids now and sure we'll stop them for a time, but then the navy will send for backup and before you know it they over power us, the mermaids are dead and we're dead."

"But we..." Philip began before Jack cut him off.

"But!" Jack exclaimed, "Find Poseidon, find a way to reinstate most or at least all the curses but dear Elizabeth's husband's curse... And you reinstate the mermaids ability to curse sailors and defend themselves thus we survive and the mermaid problem gets solved permentantly instead of temporarily, savvy?"

He had a point.

"But what about Serena?" Philip practically begged, "We can't just send her back into that war zone... And what about while we're finding Poseidon? Mermaids will die while we're out searching!"

"And more will die while we're busy trying to fight the navy that may very well overpower us seems as we're one measly ship versus hundreds of theirs..."

He was right. And once again I couldn't help feel like this was my fault. Mermaids would die either way and it was essentially the cost of my family's happiness that caused it.

"You say she's no longer able to curse men?" Jack asked towards Philip, resting a hand on his shoulder.

"Who?" Philip replied.

"You're mermaid... Serena?"

"Yes," Philip nodded, though his face was scrunched in utter confusion as he shrugged away Jack's hand.

Jack sighed once more. "Bring her aboard the ship then. We already have a selkie, the vilest villain I've ever met," he said as his head pointed up to where Jones hang, "A pregnant lady and a bunch of ghosts; what more harm could a mermaid do?"

"Can she do that?" Carina asked, " Live on land?"

"This is a ship, luv," Jack corrected, "Not land."

"Not your "luv"," Carina remarked.

"No," Jack grinned, "She's not my love, she's Philip's love."

"But can she breathe without being in the water?" I asked, ignoring Jack sensing what Carina was getting at.

"Can't mermaids turn into humans when they desire and aren't under water?" Henry asked, thoughtfully.

"Did you miss the part when all curses were broken?" Jack asked as though Henry had just asked the dumbest question imaginable.

"At least he's trying to find a solution," I argued, defending my son.

Jack made a face at me, but before he could come back with a stubborn remark Philip answered my question.

"They can live as long as they have both air and water," he explained, "For her to stay aboard the ship we'd need something to put her in, something with water."

"A rum barrel," Carina replied, thinking out loud.

"Rum?" Philip asked.

"An empty rum barrel. There's some below deck, we could cut off the top with a sword then fill it with water and put her in it!"

"Brilliant!" Philip exclaimed.

"Or," Jack yelled, causing an end to the excitement, "We could just tip a life boat, fill it with water and have her follow along there. Much quicker and doesn't require mermaid scales to go in a place I intend to refill with rum whenever we make port."

Philip shrugged. "I'll stay in the lifeboat with her then!" he exclaimed, "I don't mind getting wet and sitting in the water and they'll be enough air that I can keep my head above it." Philip smiled. "We'll go down there you!" Before he could even finish his sentence, he was running off to be with his beloved mermaid.

"One thing I really don't understand about that man," Jack mumerred looking towards the direction in which Philip had run off, "How does one make love to a mermaid?"

"Perhaps," Carina smirked, "Their relationship is based on more than just the physical... something I'm sure you pirates know nothing about." She glanced towards Henry smiling, "But something the average woman tends to value."

I smiled. It was then that I realized I really hasn't spent that much time getting to know Carina at all. She was nothing like her father. I always trusted she was a good match for Henry since I'd raised my son to not settle and the little time I had spent with her showed he definitely hadn't. It surprised me though to hear her in such an informal, nonjudgemental setting and see just how perfect she really was for him. I liked the way they balanced each other. His naivety, which had been seen too obviously that night, perfectly balanced with her spunk. She also seemed quick witted-that she was proving more and more as our conversations with Jack continued. I liked too that she wasn't afraid to stand up for herself. She was exactly the kind of woman I wanted for my son.

Henry smiled and placed an arm around her. I noted that was something he wouldn't have felt comfortable doing publicly a couple months ago. Maybe he was growing even if he still blushed at the thought of ankles.

I felt myself smiling, pridefully watching my son with the woman he was courting.

Jack cringed uneasily. "That may be true, but," he exclaimed holding up his Rum, "Least I've got a love that'll never get me hurt, aye?" He smiled, pointing at the bottle.

"Or love you back," Carina sighed.

Jack shrugged and began to head towards the staircase leading to the lower deck. "Refill time!" he announced.

"Maybe we should have left him with the selkie," Henry joked.

"At least he seems happy alone," I shrugged. I wondered If it was true what Jack had said about the girl he'd once loved and then left behind on some island or if he'd made the whole thing up. I wondered if she'd loved him. I wondered if he really didn't regret leaving her and if he really did believe that love wasn't worth the potential cost and risk.

I sighed to myself though realizing it didn't matter. If he wasn't willing to give and sacrifice everything for her it probably wasn't exactly real love anyway. That or he was a total coward and was running from love instead of giving in. I supposed I never would know the truth, but that didn't matter anyway. Jack's love story whether real or fictional had died when he stopped giving into love and instead gave up. I would never give up, no matter the cost and it seemed or so I hoped that neither would Henry or Carina. Love was worth it. It always would be. If Jack Sparrow couldn't see that, that was his loss.

"I should be heading to bed," Henry announced.

I nodded. "I as well," I smiled, Goodnight Henry, good night Carina."

The two of them wished me goodnight in return and I turned to head below deck. I smiled thinking of all the couples and love that filled our ship. Philip was finally happy and with Serena again. His news of the mermaids being hunted disturbed me, but at least we had a plan to help stop it-oddly enough, thanks to Jack. I would never fully understand him. I would never fully respect or trust the man. But I had to admit I didn't fully hate him either... maybe...

I slipped back into bed beside Will, happier than ever to be able to just lie beside him even if he was asleep. After years without that simple privilege, nights like tonight, seeing others so in love around me, made me very appreciative of his presence. I didn't have to go home as I did in the village so often, after seeing a young couple (or even worse seeing a older couple that had the privilege of growing old together) only to be alone at night mourning a love I had but at the same time didn't really have.

I had him. He was right beside me. Quietly, I gently leaned into him. The heat of his body by my own felt so perfect and so right. Smiling, I relaxed and as though the baby knew of its father presence he finally stopped moving and finally my body surrendered to sleep.

A/N

Yay we're back! I forgot how much I missed this until I started writing this chapter finally... anyway r&r please. Hopefully the length helps make up for the delay. More coming soon. :)