Well, this is a bit different from what I'm used to writing… This is a one-shot, in poetry form, which will be used to express my deep-seated hatred for all things Mary-sue, especially when it comes to all the Inuyasha fics involving these ridiculous characters. Inspired by my friend Mithrenriene Rochmabriel who wrote one of these for Lord of the Rings.

Note: do not read if you are a fan of Mary-sues. You have been warned, so don't blame me if this angers you.

…

The Mary-Sue.

An object of eternal mystery.

Emphasis on 'object.'

Why

Do they continue to spawn so rapidly?

What

Is it that so many of us see in them?

Why

Can't they understand

That there is no 'other' member of Inuyasha's crew?

There is no inu youkai princess

For Sesshoumaru to fall madly in love with.

Naraku did NOT have another reincarnation

Who seeks Inuyasha's blood,

And somehow convinces him to fall for her,

Even as she dazzles him with her 'skills' and 'beauty.'

Why

Oh why

Can't you all just die?

Why

Don't you realize

That Kagome does NOT have a sister,

And Kagome is NOT dead

So Inuyasha cannot turn to you, Mary-sue

For comfort.

Kagura does not have a twin,

Who is inherently good, and who all will love for her goodness.

She does not.

Why can't you understand that, Mary-sue?

Also, Sesshoumaru's father was NOT a rapist,

Who now serves no purpose

Other than to force Sesshoumaru into a marriage with you

For no apparent reason.

That

Is

Just

Wrong.

Inuyasha will never save you, Mary-sue,

From a pack of wild demons.

He will never happen to see you bathing some night

And fall instantly in love.

Kikyo and Kagome will never try to kill you out of spite,

Because apparently you have stolen all their men away.

Kagome and Kikyo are alive.

So Inuyasha will not be falling in love with you any time soon.

Neither will Sesshoumaru.

Neither will Naraku.

Neither will Miroku,

If you're the type who likes perverts.

Ah

Mary-sue,

You make it so hard to keep a straight face,

While you are throwing yourself,

At all our favorite characters.

Shinde, baka!

Owari.

So, what did you guys think? I thought it hit most of my major pet-peeves with Mary-sues, so I'm satisfied. BTW: don't be offended by this if you happen to be a fan of Mary-sues. Some people like them, most people don't. That's just how it is. I'm entitled to my opinion, so don't go reporting me if you're angry, or you have a fic that's similar to one of the ones I listed. I wasn't talking about any particular fic when I wrote this, just OC fics as a whole.