Sorry about the whole "taking months to update" thing.
Hell, I'm on a role now, I think I'll write a few more chapters before I go another 7 months without writing anything.

Is it just me or is this starting to turn into a crack fic?

Ah, well. Anything's possible with a Dark Knight fanfiction with a female OC.

Enjoy!

I stuck my hand on my hip, cocked my head, and smirked at the two of them.

"So you're a fag now, huh, Harvey?" I said, making fun of the poor shmuck. He grimaced in anger as Johnny went on eating his neck.

"Marissa, please, I just--," Johnny got his cheek. "Help me out here. Please. I was over here--," Johnny tousled his hair with his girly fingers and rubbed his face on Harvey's. "I was over here checking up on him like you said and when he woke up--," He gave Harvey a little peck on the lips. Harvey died on the inside. "He just started doing this. Help me, please. I can't get him to--," Johnny loosened his tie. "Stop…" I could tell Harvey was enjoying it a little, not like a noticeable little, but the kind of little only someone with crazy powers like mine would get. Only 'cause I knew what was going to happen, but I fuckin' hate foreshadowing. I walked over to the two and slowly pulled Johnny off. The farthest I could get him away from Harvey was sitting next to him, cuddling on the couch. I sat in front of them.

"Johnny," I said in a motherly and caring voice, "What happened, honey?" He smiled happily. He was thrilled to tell me this story. He was rehearsing it in his little head, I could tell.

"Life is short, Mari," Johnny said dreamily. He nudged Harvey playfully, keeping eye contact with me. "Get what you want." I raised my eyebrows and smiled at the two of them. I went over and sat next to Harvey, putting my hand on his other knee. One more hoe and the lucky bastard would've been Santa Claus.

"Hey Johnny, can I talk to Harv in the kitchen for a second?" He thought it over for a bit and like a little kid, turned to me and nodded slowly, a little grin still on his face. He pecked Harvey quickly on the cheek as we stood up and walked into the kitchen (which wasn't far because my apartment was tiny) and closed the door. Harvey collapsed in a chair and I sat down across from him, the only seat left in the kitchen. We sat there in an incredibly awkward silence for a little bit until I decided it was safe to talk.

"What the hell is going on?" I asked, both elbows on the table. Harvey looked like he was going to cry, which was one of the weirdest things I'd ever seen. I knew he wouldn't but he looked like he was going to.

"Mari…" He ran his fingers through his hair. "Jesus, I don't know what's going on. He just started this and--…" He cut himself off. I climbed up on the table and sat cross-legged in front of him.

"Look, Johnny's been in a lunatic asylum for who the hell knows how long. This is how he's trying to… eh…" I made a few hand gestures to help myself think of the word I was looking for, "…assimilate back into society. He has no idea who he is or how to act or anything. This is him--,"

"Trying to cope," he said, nodding his head a little sarcastically. "Yeah, exactly. Trying to cope. You know what, that's what everyone's doing, trying to cope. This isn't coping. This is… this is…" He took a deep breath and made the same brand of hand gesture I did.

"Being… crazy?" A voice said from the window to the left of the table. It was the Joker. He was standing on the roof. I almost shit myself. "Mind if I come in? It's a bit… brisk out here."