Title: Isabella Volturi

Author: MarieCarro

Beta: Project Team Beta

Translators: LaMomo (Italian) myworldisblue (Portuguese)

Genre: Supernatural/Drama

Rating: NC-17

Summary: After being left by Edward, I couldn't stand the thought of him controlling me even in his absence. I admit it was an act of defiance, but it was a decision that brought me more happiness than I'd ever thought I'd experience. New Moon AU/Canon

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

CHAPTER 1

"Goodbye, Bella," he said in the same quiet, peaceful voice.

"Wait!" I choked out the word, reaching for him, willing my deadened legs to carry me forward.

I thought he was reaching for me, too. But his cold hands locked around my wrists and pinned them to my sides. He leaned down, and pressed his lips very lightly to my forehead for the briefest instant. My eyes closed.

"Take care of yourself," he breathed, cool against my skin.

There was a light, unnatural breeze. My eyes flashed open. The leaves on a small vine maple shuddered with the gentle wind of his passage.

He was gone.

He had left me here all alone with absolutely nothing. All of it was over.

Love, life, and meaning, all of it … over.

I'd told him that my soul was his already and now he'd taken it with him as he left me here … alone. With only a promise that he broke as soon as he made it. As if he could ever erase himself from my memory. For me, he would always exist.

I felt the urge to walk after him into the forest but I stopped myself. It was a completely useless action; as if I would be able to find him anyway. My heart wouldn't be able to feel him anymore since it was left at my feet, shattered and beyond repair. Instead, I turned around and walked back to the house. My legs felt heavy—as if my feet were made out of lead, but I kept on walking.

How could he do this to me? To us?

The feeling of a carpet being pulled out from under my feet overwhelmed me. For the short amount of seven months, I'd had it all: love, friends, and a family in which I was loved and accepted. The world I belonged in; a world where I didn't stumble around trying to keep myself upright because I felt comfortable enough to be myself. And he took that from me.

Once inside the house, I sat down at the kitchen table and stared unseeingly at the wall. Deep in thought, I didn't realize how the time passed, so when I heard tires in the driveway, I frowned at the clock in confusion. Was that Charlie? What was he doing home at this hour? I wasn't expecting him home for at least two hours.

The front door opened and Charlie called out for me. "Bella?"

I didn't move—I couldn't find the energy to do so—and Charlie walked into the kitchen looking very sad. He'd obviously heard about the Cullens' departure and felt sympathy for me. His expression did it for me and I broke.

With a gasp, I clutched at my heart and started to sob. My tears fell unhindered down my cheeks and stained my jeans. I tried to stop them, but it was impossible. My heart was shattered and no matter what happened—no matter how much time passed—it would always have deep scars that couldn't heal. My other half, my soul, had left me and I was completely empty without him, like a vase without its flowers.

Charlie, who had always been uncomfortable with feelings, didn't hesitate as he walked into the kitchen and put his arms around me. "I'm sorry, baby girl," he said in my ear, and I leaned heavily against his chest. He allowed me to cry and didn't try to pull away. He must have realized how much I needed his support right then.

I felt him reach for something on the table and crumple it up in his hand. I didn't exactly care what it was. I was aching too much.

I must have fallen asleep against Charlie at some point because I was startled awake when he carried me upstairs to my room and put me on my bed.

"I didn't mean to wake you. Just go back to sleep."

I didn't protest. My lids were heavy and my eyes were very sore. I was sure I looked terrible.

I turned over on my side but that made me face my window, and when I saw that it was slightly open, I started to cry once again. Never again would he come through my window and have me sleep in his arms. Never again would I feel his cold breath on my neck as I fell asleep.

I clutched my pillow in my fist and buried my face in it. I wanted nothing more than for a dreamless sleep to make me forget my pain, if only for a few hours. That would be bliss. And for once, I got my wish for sleep, but it was everything except dreamless.

Different memories of my time with my love jumped through my mind.

"I think I hear your mother," he said, grinning again.

"Don't leave me," I cried, an irrational surge of panic flooding through me. I couldn't let him go—he might disappear from me again.

He read the terror in my eyes for a short second. "I won't," he promised solemnly, and then he smiled. "I'll take a nap."

…

"Is it this boy?" she whispered.

I opened my mouth to lie, but her eyes were scrutinizing my face, and I knew she would see through that.

"He's part of it," I admitted. No need to confess how big a part. "So, have you had a chance to talk with Edward?" I asked.

"Yes." She hesitated, looking at his perfectly still form. "And I want to talk to you about that."

Uh-oh. "What about?" I asked.

"I think that boy is in love with you," she accused, keeping her voice low.

"I think so, too," I confided.

...

"Shhh, Bella, calm down."

"Don't leave me," I begged in a broken voice.

"I won't," he promised. "Now relax before I call the nurse back to sedate you."

But my heart couldn't slow.

"Bella." He stroked my face anxiously. "I'm not going anywhere. I'll be right here as long as you need me."

"Do you swear you won't leave me?" I whispered. I tried to control the gasping, at least. My ribs were throbbing.

He put his hands on either side of my face and brought his face close to mine. His eyes were wide and serious. "I swear."

…

Then he smiled his crooked smiled and took my face between his hands. "I told you I'm not going anywhere. Don't be afraid. As long as it makes you happy, I'll be here."

I smiled back, ignoring the ache in my cheeks. "You're talking about forever, you know."

…

"Stay." The word was slurred.

"I will," he promised. His voice was beautiful, like a lullaby. "Like I said, as long as it makes you happy … as long as it's what's best for you."

…

"Well, I wasn't going to live without you." He rolled his eyes as if that fact were childishly obvious. "But I wasn't sure how to do it—I knew Emmett and Jasper would never help me … so I was thinking maybe I would go to Italy and do something to provoke the Volturi."

I flinched when I woke and saw the sun streaming in through my window. How ironic that first day after he left me alone in this wet and forgotten town the sun was shining. I hated how the beaming light was mocking me, and I pulled the cover over my head and stayed there the entire day. I only ate when Charlie came up with something he'd heated in the microwave.

The darkness of the night fell again outside my window and I was still in bed. Oddly enough, I felt completely exhausted and I quickly fell asleep.

…

"Well, I wasn't going to live without you," He rolled his eyes as if that fact were childishly obvious. "But I wasn't sure how to do it—I knew Emmett and Jasper would never help me … so I was thinking maybe I would go to Italy and do something to provoke the Volturi."

I didn't want to believe he was serious, but his golden eyes were brooding, focused on something far away in the distance as he contemplated ways to end his own life. Abruptly, I was furious.

"What is a Volturi?" I demanded.

"The Volturi are a family," he explained, his eyes still remote. "A very old, very powerful family of our kind. They are the closest thing our world has to a royal family, I suppose. Carlisle lived with them briefly in his early years, in Italy, before he settled in America—do you remember the story?"

"Of course I remember."

The next day, Charlie made me get up and out of bed–to shower at least–but I couldn't see the meaning of it. Why should I do anything? Since he left I was back at the beginning, back before all of this started but with memories that would haunt me forever. Out of synch with everyone, stumbling around and never finding my place in the world, just feeling utterly abnormal.

They had chased all of those feelings away. They made me feel at home, and I could be myself around all the other abnormalities. I had accepted it then, that I wasn't normal, but without them here, it was hard to see how I could have accepted it. How could I accept the fact that I wasn't normal?

Because I wasn't normal, that was why.

No matter what life threw at me when I was around them I had always been able to go through it because I had never felt as strong as I felt when I was in that world. My world; I knew that it was my world and I missed it. I missed living in it.I had chosen to live in that world a long time ago, but now it was out of my reach. But I desperately wanted to live in it again, no matter the costs.

The only problem was that I had to find a vampire to bring me into that world, and I didn't exactly know a lot of them. I knew of them. I knew that there was another family in Alaska—The Denali coven—that was an extended family of them but that was about it. And also that family in Italy, the royal one called the Volturi. I'd dreamt of the time I heard about them for the last two nights. I didn't know what it was but I couldn't shake that memory away from me. It was on repeat in my head.

Several days passed in the same slow and empty pace that it had since I was left behind, and every night I dreamt about the Volturi. It was either that memory from my birthday or it was about the time when I saw the painting of them and their names just rang in my head day and night.

Aro, Caius, and Marcus.

What was it that made me think about them exactly? I didn't really know anything about them except that they had a permanent residence in Italy.

I decided that I would probably not find answers to my questions, so tried to ignore it the best I could.

It was hard, though. I made an effort to get back to the routine I had before the Cullens'. My friends from school tried to distract me and invited me to come along on everything they could think of. And I did all I could to keep my thoughts from wandering.

Still, every night I was haunted by the same dream.

One night, about a month later, I sat upright in my bed because for once I couldn't sleep. I had just realized why I couldn't get the Volturi out of my head.

They were the key—the key to getting me into the world where I belonged. If they couldn't help me, nobody could. They were the royalties of that world after all, at least according to him.

But how exactly would I find them? Italy was a big country—a country I'd never been to—and it would be like literally trying to find a needle in a haystack.

Maybe if I…

No, that was stupid. It could not be that easy.

I got up and out of bed and did something I hadn't done in a month. I stood by my window and opened it wide. The fresh and cool air blew around me as I stared out into the night.

Tears that I hadn't allowed myself to cry made my vision blurry. "Why did you do this?" I asked the dark. "Am I really that unlovable? I thought you loved me. You said that you loved me every day. Was all of that a lie? Every kiss and caress?"

I shivered then so I closed the window.

I cast a glance at my alarm clock—Charlie was probably already asleep—and then my computer. It wouldn't exactly hurt to try.

I didn't want to disturb Charlie, so I tried to be as quiet as possible when I powered on my ancient computer. It coughed awake, and I was pretty sure the noise would wake him up, but I couldn't stop now.

Fifteen minutes later I had the internet up and typed in the words Volturi, Italy in the search engine. A few hits came up but at the top, it read; did you mean Volterra, Italy?

Hmm … that could work. I clicked the link and found a page with the city's history. There wasn't a lot but I found something interesting. Every year on March 19th, there was a big festival in the city that celebrated a Christian missionary by the name of Father Marcus. Fifteen hundred years ago he had successfully driven all the vampires out of the city, and Volterra had been announced as the safest city in the world from vampire attacks. Father Marcus had then traveled to Romania where he eventually died.

Was it simply a coincidence that Marcus was the name of one of the family members and that this missionary had driven out vampires from the city? I didn't really believe in coincidences, not since I was introduced to the supernatural world, so I was pretty sure that this Father Marcus was connected to the Volturi somehow.

I continued clicking and found a home page for the city. It was in Italian so I had a hard time understanding all of it, but I used a translator and got the basics of it.

Most of it was about what I'd just read. History of the city, population, tourist attractions, etc…

I thought hard about what I'd just read. After all of my dreams, I was almost certain that I was supposed to find the Volturi. That it was my destiny somehow.

Before I changed my mind, I pulled up a site for flights from Seattle to Florence, Italy. I had money, and it was enough for a ticket down to Italy and a ticket home if that would be necessary. Luck was actually on my side and there was a flight in six hours. It would take me about three and a half hours to drive to Seattle so I had enough time. I even found a ticket that wasn't too expensive so I quickly booked it.

It wasn't until I started to pack a few things that it hit me that I was actually doing this. I was leaving in the middle of the night to seek out a royal coven of vampires in Italy and ask them to change me. It was quite fucked up, but I couldn't find it in me to stop myself. I wanted to do this, but I didn't know what to tell Charlie. He would be devastated if he found out in the morning that I had practically run away from home, and if I actually got my wish granted, then what would become of him? Would he believe that I had been involved in an accident on my trip that cost me my life?

I didn't dwell on it, though. It would only waste time. All of that would hopefully be solved eventually.

With a small bag in my hand and all of my money and passport in my pocket, I sneaked down the stairs and into the kitchen to write a note for Charlie. That was the least I could do. He would find it very soon since he would probably wake up when I started my truck. That thing was a monster and it definitely roared like one.

I thought about what I would write for a few minutes and then quickly jotted it down.

Charlie,

I'm so sorry to leave you like this without any sort of goodbye. I hope you'll forgive me someday but I just can't stay here anymore. I can't stay in a town where I'm constantly reminded of the fact that Edward left me. I need to get away and start over. I hope you understand that.

Please don't call mom. I'm not going to her place. I just need to be alone so I'll hit the road and see where it leads me.

Just so you know, I really appreciate that you let me come and live with you and I know I've never really told you this but I love you.

Respect my wishes and don't try to find me.

Love

Bella

I read through the note several times, and for a second, I wondered if it was really fair of me to do this. In that one note, I could almost feel how this would affect Charlie and the pain I was causing him by doing this.

In the first few weeks, he would believe that I was fine and that I was only trying to find myself, which was truer than he realized. After that, he would call Mom and ask her if she'd heard anything from me, and they would both panic when they realized that neither had gotten a single call. They would try to reach me and when they couldn't, a search would be ordered. Later on, I would be placed in the files of missing persons, and years from now when the case had gone cold, Charlie and Renée would forever wonder what exactly happened with their girl and why she ran away.

A single tear fell from my eye and stained the note. They would never understand why I did this, but it wasn't exactly like I could explain it to them. It was an impossible situation I found myself in.

I could stay at home with Charlie and live my life, but I would forever feel like I was missing out on my real life—the life I was supposed to live.

Or I could go tonight and never come back. I would cause my friends and family great pain, but I would find my place in the world and I would be happy … in a way.

I took a deep breath, folded the note in half and leaned it against the coffee machine before walking out of the door.

Before I started my truck, I took one last look at the house that had been my home for the last nine months.

Forks had definitely grown on me, and I would be lying if I said that I wouldn't miss it. I had experienced more happiness in this town than I had in my entire life, and it was all thanks to a certain family of vampires that made me feel like I'd finally arrived home after a long trip.

I knew that even if I didn't find what I was looking for, I would never set foot in Forks again. I wouldn't come back. Once I passed the city limit that was it.

I silently said my goodbye to the town and took a deep breath before I started my rumbling engine.