The references made in this chapter drive me to tears.

No more updates after this. I have no more chapters to post.

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(FIVE! IT'S A MILESTONE)

Bellaface, she's got a Bella's face, she's got the body of a Bella and the face of a Bella, and she flies through the air cause she's got a Bella face, Bellaface!

One day, Bellaface was flying through the kitchen. "I'm hungry," she exclaimed. However, she forgot that she was at the Cullen's house. They're vampires so they don't eat anything. "God, I wish I knew people that actually ate food," she lamented, bored.

Suddenly, Edward came out from the wild blue yonder and hugged Bellaface. "Mewowowow!" He screamed, clawing Bellaface's face.

"Ow, Edward, you silly vampire, I'm going to tie you to a chair and ravish you!" Bella squealed.

Carlisle flew in from above. "Bellaface, bondage is sick! It reminds me of the hunt!" Suddenly, Carlisle passed out. Hitler showed up and started to scream in German before peeing on Carlisle and departing.

"Wow, this day is full of weird things," Bellaface mused.

Rosalie showed up, hiding in a box. "Nyeh," she mumbled before climbing out. "I haven't peed on Carlisle yet." So she pulled down her pants, squatted over Carlisle's face and peed yellow body juice before leaving as well.

"Hm," Bellaface meowed.

The window in the living room crashed and Stauffenberg came into the kitchen. "What am I doing in this story?" He asked Bellaface, whose head was inflated dramatically and her body tiny and dangling. She was floating, of course.

"That's what I'd like to know," Bellaface said.

Then the real Catface appeared. "Hey, what are you doing?" He spat in his French accent. "Are you ripping off my Youtube video?"

"What's a Youtube?" Asked the hopelessly outdated Stauffenberg.

"Just for that, I'm going to pee on Carlisle," Catface insulted. He turned and peed on Stauffenberg.

"Ew!" Staffy yelled, trying to stop the flow with his stump of a right hand. "I'm not Carlisle!"

"The real one is passed out on the floor- OHMIMGOD IT'S THE HOBO FROM THE LAST INSTALLMENT!" Bellaface screamed, flying for cover, but her big, levitating head was giving her away.

Carlisle woke up and tried to head-butt the hobo. But the hobo was smarter. He made Carlisle throw up his sandwich and pissed on Stauffenberg before leaving.

"Hey! I only got pissed on twice today!" Carlisle shouted, triumphantly shoving a fist in the air.

"Stan and Kyle are giving each other blowjobs in the corner," Staffy observed.

Thus, Carlisle and Stauffenberg had to take a tomato juice bath together. They hated it. But at least the hobo wasn't here this time. Even though a Nazi and a vampire look weird together.

F.I.N

Extra: Carlisle Lessons in Life

Don't be racist, kids! Look where being racist got Hitler! He killed himself! And remember, don't commit suicide! If you do, you'll get fat.