This used to be a fic depicting a sexual scenario between an adult and a minor. I was a minor when I wrote it, and was without the understanding of power dynamics I have now, due in part to the long history of sexual violence and CSA within my family. Also at the time a lot of my friends and relatives were in relationships with "older" men—AKA creeps. This does not justify the content of this fic.

As an adult I grew aware of the power I myself have and became very uncomfortable with what I'd written. I'd portrayed the 'relationship' in what I'd considered to be healthy at the time: gentle, loving, with multiple instances of vocal consent, and Kakashi directing the encounter. I understand now that all of these things are abuse in this context, and that there is no such thing as consent between a minor and an adult. Love does not cause an adult to abuse a child. Love protects, and even if trauma drives a child to apparently 'seek out' sexual contact with an adult—as occurred in this story—love understands the source of the hurting and will never contribute to that trauma. If it does, it's not love. It's abuse.

If this were just about me and my guilt, I would delete this fic entirely. But I've also realized the influence fandom culture has had in normalizing this kind of content for me and others. At twelve a lot of the fic I read contained instances of twelve-year-olds in "relationships" with adults. These were typically written by adults, and felt nearly unavoidable because of how deeply 'shota' was ingrained in shipping culture. They were often wrongfully equated with gay relationships; seen as 'taboo' and easily fetishized.

Many of those adults are still active in fandom circles. I find it horrifying that they are most often the ones "advocating" against what they consider ship-hate. I realize I now have the same power of influence over younger fans as they had over me. In the past these kinds of fics received little enough criticism that they could be found on nearly every rec list. We cannot continue to normalize this shit. So I'll say it here: fics like this are not okay. No matter how many warning labels you slap on them, no matter what argument you use to justify them. They are not 'cute' or 'tragic' or 'sexy' or 'taboo'. They are pedophilia, plain and simple. And they're wrong.

It's not 'just' fiction. Fandom can have a huge impact on your developing understanding of sexuality as a young fan. As adults and older teens, it's our responsibility to make it adamantly clear that fandom is not a pass to glorify abuse. Our thoughts and fantasies have real life effects, and I have experiences that will affect me my whole life because the culture we live in is rife with rape and pedophilia-apology. Don't be someone who contributes to it. Understand that this isn't normal, and no one should be okay with it—especially the people you love and look up to.