Favorite Quote: "Was that a goat?"

Motto: You can't not let anything ever happen to the ones you love. If you did, nothing would ever happen to them.

I would love to have reviews, and constructive critisism is welcome. In other words, if you tell me my writing sucks I expect you to tell me why. And "I don't like it" doesn't count as a why. I've never understood why "I don't like it" is suppose to be a good response. What don't you like about it? THAT's what I want to know!

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Thanks to all those who were worried over me and my sick family. My family is now fine but it turns out I didn't have the flu, I'm pregnant. So my sickness will last for another seven or eight months. I've also recently discovered I have two buldging discs in my neck. Since I'm limited in painkillers because of the pregnancy, they are very painful. Needless to say, writing will be very slow for a while. I'm hoping to get our laptop back soon, that should make it easier, but until then just be patient, I haven't forgotten any of you or my stories. I'm just having to move very slowly for a while.

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I was browsing profiles and someone had this really great idea that I now intend to use (thank you demona).

MY DISCLAMER: I do not own Naruto or any of it's related characters, terms or plots. I only own the imagination that comes up with these sick cracked ideas and... they are free to use them. Use my OC's! Use my plot points! USE ME! Imortalize me forever in one of your books! I beg of you, Naruto writes! All I ask is that you tell me you're going to do it! In fact, put my name in the book! Somewhere in kanji on the side lines! Yeah that's good! Wait. This was suppose to be a disclaimer.

I don't own Naruto... but they can own me!

Oh, and I don't own Rachel Morgan either. In fact, I don't own anything I write about because it's, dare I say it... FANFICTION!! Yesh!

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1. Naruto

2. Sai

3. Gaara

4. Hinata

5. Gai

6. Sakura

7. Lee

8. Choji

9. Shino

10. Kankuro

11. Kisame

12. Jiraiya

Have you ever read a 6/11 fanfiction before? ah... no, not that they don't exist

Do you think 4 is hot? How Hot? Well, if I were into girls I guess she would be hot.

What would happen if 12 got 8 pregnant? Eww

Do you recall any fics about 9? More than a few

Would 2 and 6 make a good couple? I think so. She might be the only one who could tolerate him... damn, now I'm thinking about it

5/9 or 5/10? If we have to go there then lets do 5/10. My hypocracy only goes so far.

What would happen if 7 walked in on 2 and 12 having sex? He would probably think it was a new form of training and stay to watch.

Make up a summary of a 3/10 fanfic. A comforting gesture or forbiden brotherly love. Suna's in an uproar and the fan girls are going wild. Gaara/Kankuro. Yaoi and incest or love and friendship? Read and see.

Is there any such thing as a 1/8 fluff? It's Choji so... yeah, I'm sure there is. Damn, got that one in my head too.

Suggest a title for a 7/12 hurt/comfort fic. Lee's momumental bliss crumbles at his feet when he opens the door to Jiraiya and deflates farther when the lengendary toad sage informs him of his sensei and team mates deaths. Will Jiraiya's stories be enough to heal his heart and save his life?

What kind of plot would you use if you wanted 4 to deflower 1? You have GOT to be kidding me! Let's see... Hinata deflower Naruto without changing their characters. Very percise and creative use of the gentle fist style... Naruto tied to the bed by her teammates... turn off all the lights... Gag the blond... yeah, that could work. A lot of bondage and some careful planning by outside parties.

Does anyone on your friends list read 3 het? You're joking right?

Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 11? always a possibility

Would anyone on your friends list write 2/4/5? ... ... No.

What might ten scream at a moment of great passion? Most likely words would escape him. I'm thinking he'd just scream.

If you wrote a song fic about eight what song would you choose? My Nutty Nutmeg Phantasy

If you wrote a 1/6/12 fic, what would the warning be? Warning: Jiraiya WILL GET LAID! No Yaoi but a serious Lolita complex. Oh, and a threesome. Can't forget the threesome.

What might be a good pick-up line for 10 to use on 2? "Hey! You look pretty good from the back. Let's do it."

How might 11 describ a relationship between 2 and 8? "Can I kill them now or do I need to wait until they're done?"

How emo is 7? It all depends on your definition of EMO

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Someone sent this to my e-mail. I thought it was funny! You may not, but then, this is my profile so... (sticks out tongue) to you.

How to say 'I love you' in 25 languages
English: I Love You
Spanish: te amo
French: Je T'aime
German: lch Liebe Dich
Japanese: Ai Shite Imasu
Thai: Phom rak khun
Italian: Ti amo
Chinese: Wo Ai Ni
Swedish: Jag Alskar
Alabama, Arkansas, Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas, North Carolina, South Carolina, Georgia, Tennessee, Missouri, Mississippi, Louisiana, Virginia, West Virginia, Kentucky, and parts of Florida: Nice Ass, Get in the truck

8/10/08

I have four more weeks before I'll be able to finish the stories I started on before surgery. I'm writing this now under the influence of Percocet (which still makes me loopy even at half dose) and therefore don't hurt as much. I'll pay later. But just a little longer and I should be able to give you at least three updates and a new story if I can pull it off. You'll at least get the three updates. Thank you for your patience and I hope not too many people have given up on me. See you soon!