I am one with the world. I believe in being a part of it. Being at peace with ones surroundings. Knowing this i seek to be at peace with everything. I observe, i speak, and i live. My goal for right now is grasping a new persona; I have moved to wear i belong and have started a new life. I will conquer my old life with the sword known as my new one. I am a writer, nothing more nothing less. Alas, these are my words. I will live as though i have written this day. I will speak as though i have written your lines. I will socialize as though my friends were my characters, and i will dominate life's challenges as if they were plot twisters. I approach but my life as another script to be written. I have the pen. I have the paper. I have the mind. So be it.

-Jasmine Monroe (me)

The simplest things in life that i enjoy are of what should be called ''immature.'' But if one were to define such a trap of a word, what would you get?

I will be honest with you. I love it when someone says to me"You're just 13. You can't do anything" I LOVE it. It is strange, but it is because i know what they're saying is pure rubbish and i couldn't care less. Your stereotype of ones age proves your ignorance. So it is because i am thirteen that i am incapable of being the best i can be? Foolishness.

Be reminded, my young friend, no matter your age you can be whatever; or whoever it is you seek. This is another thing i keep in mind.

Anyways, enough of that now. California Gruesome has entered the building :DD

HEY THERE! How are YOU? As you should already know, I'm thirteen years old and i'm awesome.

Here are a little bit of shit facts about me, mmkay?

I'm really awesome when you get to know me.

I hate stereotypes. Get to know the person before you state your crap.

I just love me some hoodies.

Anime, ftw.

PHINIEAS AND FERB, FTW

S.O.U.T.H P.A.R.K F.T.W!

I love music. I honestly, truly do.

When i was younger, i wanted to be principal of every school in the world.

I'm not 'random'. That's just ridiculous. I'm just me; someone totally off from the world, and loving every moment of it.

My best friend right now is most likely Christy; i love the girl like crazy

Anyways, my profile is boring. I'm sorry =w=

Music: Lady Gaga, Taio Cruz, Aretha Franklyn, Dead or Alive, The Beatles, Usher etc.

I love movies. I'll watch almost anything: Little Manhatten, Meet the Robinsons, Vampires Suck etc

Look, i'm falling asleep. It's about 3 am on September 3rd 2010. I'm about to shut this death trap down after a few more minutes. If their is really anything else you want to know just pm me, mmkay? But before i go let me say just a few more things mmkay?

I LURVE South Park. And sha, i made a fan character. Her name is Tuesday Acqua :DDD She's a beautiful, hazel eyed Italian girl who moved from Italy to to South Park when she was three. She is madly in love with Kyle (if not Kyle, then like Stan or Kenny or Mark Cotswold) Yeahh son. Here is kinda what she looks like. Ish.

http:///image/tan/roxursox456/girl.jpg

Anyways i'm tired. Just read what's below so i can go to bed.

Number your favorite characters in South Park in any order, and answer the following questions! Have fun!..

1: Stan

2:Kyle

3:Ike

4:Cartman

5:Bebe

6:Wendy

7:Randy

8:Timmy

9:Rebecca

10:Kenny

1. Have you read a five/ten fic before?

Bebe and Kenny? nah that would be an awesome read though!

2. Do you think three is hot? How hot?

Ike? he's definatley smexy, but i;m not attracted to him. That's like...illegal..xD

3. What would happen if six got one pregnant?

Wendy can get stan pregnant? that's impossible! but if it were the other way around, that raven-haired boy would jump for the sky! if they were older at least ._.

4. Do you recall any good fics about nine?

Oh yes there was this really nice one when they wrote the show over when kyle denied he could ever find love again and poof here comes rebecca!

5. Would seven and two make a good couple?

RANDY AND KYLE? UGH! NO!

6. Four/eight or four/nine?

NEITHER! Kyle would kill cartman and timmy and cartman is just gross ._.

7. What would happen if seven discovered three and eight in a secret relationship?

Randy found out ike and timmy in a relationship? kinda gross..

8. Make a summary of at least twenty words for a two/six fic.

Wendy and Kyle eh? well...How about Kyle is jealous that stan is giving wendy so much attention and trolling behind her like a dog when she treats him like shit, when he's been showing his affections for years and finally decides to show it...no? xD

9. Is there a such thing as a four/ten romantic fluff story?

Cartman and Kenny? HELL YEAH! XD

10. Suggest a title for a one/five Hurt/Comfort fic.

Stan and Bebe comfort thing? Eh, Kyle hurt Bebe;s feelings and now wants Stan to apologize to her for him? (like the whole you talk to her scene in raisins) because she dun wanna talk to kyle? xD?

11. What kind of plot would you use if four wanted to seduce one?

Cartman seduce Stan? the ONLY reason he'd ever do that would probably be to piss off either Kyle or Wendy...

12. Does anyone on your friends list read number seven het? What about nine slash?

HELL TO THE NO. they don't read fanfiction/don't know what south park is/don't care for it

13. If you wrote a songfic about number ten, what song would you choose?

Songfic about Kenny...i'd probably use ''Fuck her Gently'' by Tenacious D if i were writing about how he wanted to screw this girl cuzz he actually cared about her...xD

14. If you wrote a two/three/six fic, what would the warning be?

Kyle Ike and Wendy? maybe have Wendy come over and hwlp Kyle baby-sit him? then you know have Stan come over and get all pissed...the warning? maybe KylexWendy?

15. What pick-up line might eight use on five?

Timmy on Bebe? uh...''Timmy...timmehhh..." wink wink? xD

LIST YOUR FAVORITE CHARACTERS AND ACT AS IF YOU WERE ACTUALLY IN THE SHOW:

1: Kyle

2:Stan

3:Ike

4:Cartman

5:Bebe

6:Wendy

7:Randy

8:Timmy

9:Rebecca

10:Kenny

Then ask the following questions~

What would you do if Number 1 woke you up in the middle of the night?

I'd say: 'Kyle? wtf is it?'

Number 2 walked into the bathroom while you're showering?

Stan!! He'd blush like mad, stammer, then RUN!

Number 4 announced he/she's going to marry 9 tomorrow?

Cartman marry Rebecca? WHAT?

Number 5 cooked you dinner?

Bebe? --checks for poison-- _

Number 6 was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?

Wendy?! Why would she be sleeping beside me on the beach?! Thats fucked up, dude! WHAT THE HELL? xD

Number 7 suddenly confessed to be part of your family?

Randy? in my family? ._.

Number 8 got into the hospital somehow?

TIMMY IN TEH HOSPITAL? OH NOES!

Number 9 made fun of your friends?

Rebecca? she'd do no such thing! but if she did i'd just say screw yourself, you home schooled slut! :D

Number 10 ignored you all the time?

Kenny ignore me? aww, probsbly forgot something'

Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will 1 do?

He'd probably reply with "Holy Shit dude" then round up the boys and try to hide me...maybe...xD

You're on a vacation with 2 and manage to break your leg. What does 2 do?

I'm on a vacation with my Stan? wendy wouldn't like that...but he'd probably help me along the way _

It's your birthday. What does 3 get you?

Ike? maybe a toy truck or a condom ._.

You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does 4 do?

Cartman? he'd LAUGH, grab a bucket of popcorn and soda and WATCH!

You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will 5 do?

Bebe? maybe warn me of all the consiquences and talk me out of doing it

You're about to marry number 10. What's 1's reaction:

I'm gonna marry Kenny? awesome! Stan would probably say "Congrats, dude"

You got dumped by someone. How will 7 cheer you up?

He'd say screw him and go find another...xD

You compete in a tournament. How does 9 support you?

Rebecca: ju-just do your best! an-and everything will go sw-swell! -tries to make out with a passing boy- xD

You can't stop laughing. What does 10 do?

Kenny? maybe tell me to stfu...xD

Number 1 is all you've ever dreamed of. Why?

Kyle? well i mean i've always loved Kyle he's so nice and sexy and gorgeous with that red afro for hair and thoughs green sparkling eyes...-dreamy daze...drools- -someone snaps their fingers in front of me- huh? i mean gosh! Kyle's just a friend! i mean...he's so nice and funny and shy and so oh so caring...--daydreams--...

Number 2 tells you about his/her deeply hidden love for number 9.

Stan loves Rebecca? where did THAT come from? Kyle won't be to happy about that...not to mention Wendy...Kyle and Wendy would probably team up to make his life a living hell...xD

You're dating 3 and he/she introduces you to her/his family. Would you get along?

Why the hell am i dating a little baby boy? i'm no crazy ass teacher! ._.

Will number 5 and 6 ever kiss?

Bebe and Wendy kiss? that would be SO HOT! Kyle and Stan would probably walk in and be like woah,out gf's are making out... xD

Number 6 appears to be a player, breaking many hearts. What do you do?

Wendy does break so many hearts! She's such a naughty girl! Poor stan in that rasins episode...and what would i do? I'd probably join up with wendy haters and KILL HER!! xD

You had a haircut and 7 can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?

Randy? looking? at me? either he's a pervert, or must be laughing at me inside...-.-

Number 8 thinks he/she’ll never get a girl/boyfriend. What will you tell him/her?

I'm say "C'mon Timmy! there must be a girl out there who loves you!"

Number 1 is too shy to face you and confesses there love by sending an email. Now what?

K-K-Kyle loves me? melts I LOVE YOU TO KYLE! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! --kisses him all over-- MWAH! MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH!...what? i can't dream to? sheesh!

You spot 10 kissing 1. How do you react?

KENNY KISSING KYLE? WHAT THE FUC- -.-.......takes picture and shows it to the school KYLE IS MINE!

You notice that 3 and 4 have been inside that hotel room for MORE then a few hours. What are you thinking?

Stan and Ike? what the hell...? they better not be...EW NO!

Could 1 and 6 be soul mates?

Kyle and Wendy? hmmm...if you think about it they could date but soulmates? nah

Would 2 trust 5?

Stan trust Bebe? i suppose he'd have to. She's like the biggest link between him and his girlfriend and her emotions...xD

Number 4 is bored and pokes 10. What happens after that?

Cartman poke Kenny...Kenny would poke him back and then it's be a war finally ending with Kenny dying somehow and cartman yelling "RESPECT MAH AUTHRATEH!" xD

5 and 1 are forced to go back to school together. What class will they pick?

Bebe and Kyle? uh oh...maybe film class....

If 6 and 3 cooked dinner what would they make?

Hmm...Wendy would probably let Ike choose and help him cook it. xD

7 and 9 apply for a job. What job?

Randy and Rebecca? Well randy has a job and i think rebecca would be a perfect rasins girl....

8 gives 5 a haircut. Is that okay?

TIMMY GIVING BEBE A HAIR CUT? NEV-AH! XD

9 sketches what 6's perfect girl/boyfriend should look like; will 6 be happy?

Rebecca would probably draw Stan... o_o

10 and 9 are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?

Rebecca and Kenny blushing? Putting the whore and the pervert together? WHAT AN AWESOME FANFIC IDEA! launches next fanfic about them as for the convo, different types of make out sessions?

1 accidentally kicked 10?

Kyle kicking Kenny? ''sorry Kenny!'' ''eh, is alright''

2 sent a message to his/her Bf/Gf but 9 got it. What would happen?

Stan sent a message to wendy but rebecca got it? oh hell, she'd probably try to make out with him the next time she saw him...xD

5 and 6 did a workout together?

Bebe and Wendy? O-k... Maybe normal girl stuff, or trying to keep their bodies in shape for Kyle and Stan, if you get what i mean ;)

6 noticed he/she wasn't invited to your birthday?

Oh sorry, Wendy. I must have forgotten you. You can come if you want, but NO GUNS!

7 won the lottery?

Randy won the lottery? WOO! GO RANDY! XD

8 had quite a big secret?

Timmy's secret would just be timmy so i dun give a damn...

9 became a singer?

Rebecca a singer? her best seling album "Being a slut dun mean i ain't fun!" Lyrics: I may like a lot of boys, but that don't mean i don't love my toys! --der der ner ner- xD

10 got a daughter?

Kenny? a daughter? woo! i'd love to see her! but he probably wouldn't give a rats ass...xD

What would 1 think of 2?

Kyle think of stan? well i think Kyle and Stan are THEE besest friends EVAR! but if we're talking slash bs, then Kyle thinks Stan is hot and wants to screw him, perhaps?

How would 3 greet 9?

Ike greet rebecca? hi...runs away

What would 4 envy about 5?

Cartman about Bebe? Maybe how she can use her boobs to destroy society? xD

What dream would 5 have about 6?

Um, maybe about them shopping all day and all the clothes and accessories were 5-for-1? xD

What do 6 and 7 have in common?

Wendy and Randy? eh, they both love Stan deeply?

What would make 7 angry at 8

Randy mad at timmy...maybe if randy were asking a very serious question and timmy only replied with timmy...xD

Where would 8 meet 9?

Timmy meet rebecca? at her house...oh damn is Timmy about to get some lovin'? xD

What would 9 never dare to tell 10?

Rebecca never tell Kenny...that...she...uh...i dunno i'm sorry xD

What would make 10 scared of 1?

Kenny scared of Kyle...nothing, Kyle isn't scary at all _

Is 3 Gay?

Ike? nah. He got laid by a hot teacher!

How do you feel right now?

Oh just wonderful! xD

Here's some random shit by me! Some of the things i have problems with:

1: The insult of Nerd: think about it, nerds totally rule the world. Because withother nerds, they're wouldn't be all the shit you fuckin preps adore so much. For example, some cheerleaders are mean and snotty right? well all that make up and the body movements you learned would've never existed if some 'nerd' did';t figure out a) cosemtics and b) how the body is able to bend and stretch. I am a PROUD nerd. I'm smart, and pretty. It IS possible to be both you know!

2:Accusations and assumptions: I'm a twelve year old girl. I am the smartest child in my grade, why? because i was exposed to mature things at a young age and i was able to understand them. i started watching south park when i was really young (i remember the first episode i watched was spooky fish) i understood that the fish was some sorce of evil, and that the (as i recall) 'blue hat' guy was scared. i recently watched that episode, and so many memories rushed through my mind. it was really weird. Also, do you know how many sexual slurs i know? it isn't natural! but i KNOW them! I may be 12, but don't cut me short just because my AGE group acts like idiots! news flash! i am NOT my age group! i am my own person! Go screw yourself if you're that prejudice!

3: The definition of 'normal': now, what IS normal? think about it. Normal could be having two parents and going to school everyday right? well someone elses' normal could be having a single parent and playing in a band! there is no solid one meaning of normal! My normal could be your weird! LIVE WITH IT!

People that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm BLACK so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so i MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I'm LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so i MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
Im NOT A VIRGIN, so i MUST be easy.
'I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
Im GERMAN, so i MUST be a Nazi.
'

I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK, so i must only wear black and date other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
Im MIXED, so i MUST be screwed up.
'I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA

I'm BI-CURIOUS, so I MUST be a immature child wanting to fit in.

I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect

I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black

I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so i MUST think everyone i see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSS DRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FAN GIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I watch PORN, so i MUST be perverted
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a kilts
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUN HAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.

YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF...
You talk to yourself a lot. (Alot meaning all the time...)
You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')
When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean someone's liver?')
After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'
You live off of sugar and caffeine (the two greatest things ever discovered!)
You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.
You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.
You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.
No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.
The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.
Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.
People think you have A.D.H.D.
You think it'd be cool to have A.D.H.D.
You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense.
You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason
Your friends stopped looking at you funny when you laugh for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.