UPDATES TO MY GUMMI FIC HAVE BEEN POSTED! MORE FORTHCOMING!

I want to give my appologies to everyone who has been watching me faithfully for many years in hopes of having more writing. I have plans to start more, but I want to finish Oracle and Kings first before I go back to writing new stories, or it will never get done.

My life. You know by now if you read all my stories that my mother died in 2010. In the years since my mother died, I've also lost two more of my Grandparents (I only have my Nonna left) and I've gone into deep debt. I had a special needs cat staying with me temporarily from 2016 until August of this year but I had to give him up because I couldn't care for him, it was taking its toll on my mental health. I was, and still am, broken hearted to give him up but I know it was for the best, for his best interests.

But the worst was that last year my father was kicked out by his landlord, not for not paying, but he'd been paying cash money, not on a lease, and the landlord wanted the room back for a relative. So my dad has been homeless since 2016 and I've been under a great deal of worry and stress. I can't afford to have him live with me. I love him, but we are like water and oil when we have a conversation and we'd both drive each other into insanity, or homicide, one or the other, so even though I had offered, he will not live with me. He tried living with my sister, but was driven almost crazy. A house with two bedrooms and six people is too many people and not enough rooms...or enough food or money either.

And now he's searching for work or a place to live, and despite being retired he can't really afford a nice apartment on his pension but that is what he wants and he's being stubborn about it. He refuses to go to a nursing or retirement home even though he does have a disability and could probably get on the list for one easily, so he's probably going to spend another winter living in his truck, at his age, and its stressful for me. I'm worried about him succumbing to the cold, or getting beat up or robbed on the street, or starting to drink or have other problems. What if he gets hurt or doesn't have enough food? So I haven't been able to write.

I've been helping out however I can, mostly by getting my own health and life back in order. I currently have a bronchial infection of some sort so I'm house-ridden until it clears up. I have eaten far too much soup, delivery fast food and junk food than is good for my health, but I haven't gained much weight back, from what I lost during my last year of depression, which means my next visit to the doctor will probably involve bloodwork and a change in diet. Goodbye pizza and pop.

I'll be staying at home for Christmas again. I've disowned a large portion of my dad's relatives for not even letting him stay a night with them in their large houses. I have had friends do things that have really upset me, shocked me, or made me jealous. I've lost a friend recently that I'm still struggling with. Not to death but to a life that I am no longer a part of and its very lonely to be the abandoned one in the friendship, for all she protests that she hasn't left, she has.

And on top of all this, I've been broke for a few months now so Christmas is going to be coming to me through the computer screen, rather than from a grocery store or shopping mall. It makes me feel like I'm a failure for not making enough money to buy gifts for my cats, my family, or myself, but I'm slowly but surely getting a handle on my debt. I have a lot less debt than other people and I'm grateful that I do have food to eat and a food over my head.

I think that covers what I've been absent for. I also have been working on building a small studio in my bedroom. I've my futon moved into the living and my bedroom will become my office and my space for artistic creativity. I hope to start sewing and crafting and painting and making things to sell on etsy. I want to have my own business and become independent. And write again without stress.