Your story is actualy pretty good! I luv it. cant wait til the next chapter!

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It's Good!

“There is no Impossible… it's just a question of Power”

Great chapter! LOL. Poor Harith... Thanks for writing this. God bless!

really good and really fun, specially the little bath thing and how to mentally torture gnarl with little female details, haha, also wondering how shes going to torture and abuse that sorry excuse for a man, now that she has him she gets a pet in her dungeons.

Great chapter! Once again, I have to say that this was rather interesting. Thanks for writing this. God bless!

I think its the name. You get Over"lord" from feudal society and the idea of an "Overlady" just sounds stupid. But no. I'm usually critical about these authoress fics where a male character is swapped out for a female just to get that gender-swapping element in, dreadful even, but this is interestingly written.

You give a lot of detail and care to your word choice, in fact, this is probably one of the top 3 stories in this category. Good luck, and keep writing.

I like the idea of the Overlady, I was a bit skeptical until I saw how well you're portraying it. Its not too Mary Sue, she's not starting off as an all-powerful, tomboyish warrior princess as all Overlords (and now Overlady) start out having to avoid certain battles and need to gradually build their strength in numbers. And the role is ambiguous enough to allow for such.

Even that stupid Wii game leaves this role a bit more open than usual female inserts, what with the random emo kid jumping into a suit of armor and slinging an axe along his shoulders like its nothing.

Bravo, I say!

HA HA HA! It's Good! that poor fool...

The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary, men alone are quite capable of evey wickedness" - joseph conrad

and

"When your girlfriend's 'monthly friend' comes over for dinner, just smile and nod and maybe you'll live...maybe."

Great chapter, but there are still mistakes here and there.

"access it. . It wasn’t"- There is a second dot that shouldn't be there.

"to survive in the years in the weather"- It would make it more clearer if it was like this - "some books did manage to survive the withering of time" It's good to notice these little tid-bits, they make your story flow more easily.

"Gnarl went on took out"- Did you mean, "Gnarl went and took out"?

"Then a loud and aggravated on fallowed after"- Loud and aggravated what? Also, fallowed should be followed.

"He berried her with him in"- Berried? It's buried

"Gnarl not really like the idea and not having a choice either flung the book over his shoulder and walked down the long hallway and down the flight of stairs to see how his moody lady was doing."- This is good but it it would be better like this - "Gnarl not really liking the idea and not having a choice either, flung the book over his shoulder and walked down the long hallway and down the flight of stairs to see how his moody lady was doing" Again it's important to notice these little things.

“I had said sorry times and times again"- Could be changed to "I said sorry time and time again" or "I said sorry several times last night, this morning and a mew moments ago"

I'll give you the rest of my review at a later date, i've gotta go now.

yet again, nice chapter. Please tell me what this will be? Please? Femslash(lesbian[personal favorite]) or het(straight)

It's Good!

I feel sorry for any man that is doom to that fate...

a wife that at any time can kill him or worse...

I will die laughing if he is a submissive spineless wimp...

the whole thing feels kinda rushed so far, but that is not what i wish to discuss.

all overlord games feature some form of decision. in the original it is between good and evil. in overlord two it is domination or destruction. i have not reached any decision points in overlord: dark legend, which is weird, considering how far i got, but i am guessing it is forgiveness vs revenge.

here, it could be high society (but evil, like you see in anime sometimes) vs barbarian. throwing the traitor into the dungeon to be eaten by whatever is down there vs sticking your sword through his chest, twisting it, and cleaving his head in two. sending minions in to do the dirty work vs sacrificing them to buff yourself and charging in. making the peasants pay through the nose for the solution to their petty problems vs doing to them what you did to the traitor.

Great chapter! I understand about English being your second language. I'm impressed you have this written so well if that's the case. If you'd like, I can beta this. Anyway, how about having an amateurish adventurer try fighting Andromeda? Thanks for writing this. God bless!

I'll try to give you some ideas:

She could hunt for the rest of the tower objects to increase her power, the two forge's for example. Or you could put in a ancient library of some kind in the tower where Gnarl finds something interesting Andromeda should have.

Maybe you could have her try to raise her own army, minions are good but it's always better to have more. You could also have her find other races to put into that army, like trolls or orcs. There is also the option of finding the rest of the minion hives but in different places from the original game or something.

Honestly i have no idea how you got writers block this early, though i do hope my suggestions help a bit.

o.0 idea... In mind... Perfect... You should make this a femslash (: that would be awesome please and ty, but of course you might not want to, that's cool I guess.

Great story! This was rather interesting, though there are a few spelling errors. Thanks so much for writing this. God bless!