trigger

[Part I of III]

She didn't know when she started finding him attractive.

Well, she supposed she found him attractive the moment he met her—standing on her stoop in the rain, scowling from beneath his hood, beard gleaming wet and blue eyes full of irritation. Not the best first impression. But that evening had been full of miserable first impressions, so the thought of a handsome Dwarf standing on her sodden stoop hadn't been that big of a blow. She had thought him terribly tall, and muscular to boot; and she would be a dreadful liar if she couldn't admit that his beautiful singing had been wonderful. Something deep within her had quivered and her eyes had even watered a touch over Thorin Oakenshield's singing. (That was the first time he made her cry—and it wouldn't be the last.)

But now, this was quite different. She couldn't understand why her eyes kept snagging on him; why he seemed to cast light, dimming others around him. Truly his presence was an awesome might, as implacable and terrifying as a mountain, and when he barked orders there was something deliciously grumbly in his voice; Thorin demanded attention, from his posture to his build, and even the off-putting scowl that always seemed seated on his features wasn't a deterrent.

She kept finding herself staring at him, watching his big, calloused hands move expertly through whatever task happened to occupy his time. He never moved to excess—everything about him was firm and deliberate, as if wasted movement was a crime. No matter how difficult the task seemed to be (swordfighting, lighting the campfire, fishing, getting Kili to shut up) he concluded it swiftly and succinctly.

Once, she had seen him carry back an armload of firewood from the forest and the way his broad shoulders hugged the branches had made her blush like a tween for some reason; it was thoroughly ridiculous. Then on another occasion, she had watched him tug idly on the braids in his hair, and had wondered what his beard would feel like beneath her fingers.

It really was bothering her, truly, that she couldn't find out why she was following him around such. Part of her wanted to stay quite a distance away from Thorin, since his proximity always seemed to bring out the worst in her. And yet another part wanted to be as close to him as possible, perhaps tucked inside his cloak, where it was certain to be warm and cozy. And quite close to his strong chest, as a happy coincidence.

Bella jerked and nearly fell off her pony. How could she have been so stupid? Here she was, daydreaming about cuddling beneath Thorin's cloak and fantasizing about running her fingers through his beard and hair…

She had a crush on Thorin Oakenshield!

Well, of all the preposterous, ridiculous things!

Now that that problem had been solved, Bella had to find out what to do about it. She couldn't go around mooning over the King of Erebor—it wasn't proper. This kept her busy for many days, and as they traveled her little problem became worse. Now, whenever someone mentioned his name she twitched, and when she saw him, a blush rose immediately to her cheeks. Seeing as it was a small company and they spent the whole day together, Bella spent quite a bit of time twitching and blushing.

"Are you all right, Bella?" Balin finally asked her one night, as they were sitting around the campfire. "You've been rather jumpy lately. Nothing bothering our burglar, I hope?

"Of course not!" Bella managed a smile over the rim of her bowl. Thorin came clomping noisily back to camp and sat down with a flourish; she choked on a bit of soup and Kili pounded her on the back. Thorin barely spared her a glance, and instead warmed his hands by the fire. She missed the mischievous look exchanged between Fili and Kili, and if she had seen it, she might have been better off just getting up and leaving.

"Are you sure?" Fili asked innocently. "We've noticed you've been a bit red in the face these past few weeks."

"'Round the ears, too," Kili added, nodding and scraping his spoon around the bowl.

"As a matter of fact, you always get red whenever Uncle comes around," Fili said, "has he been a bully? Because you know it's how he shows affection."

Bella blushed to the roots of her hairline and buried herself in her soup. "Of course! I mean, of course not, I don't need…erm, affection. I'm fine. Yes. Quite fine."

"Leave Bella alone, boys," Balin spoke up, giving them a glare. Fili and Kili were having entirely too much fun with their bashful burglar.

To make matters worse, Thorin looked up and Bella could feel those beautiful blue eyes on her. She turned even pinker and spilled some soup on her bodice, but hardly noticed, her hands were shaking so badly. It was mean of the boys, so horribly mean to tease her so—she wasn't that obvious, was she? And yet she couldn't control her blush.

"Well, Bella might be ill," Kili put in, trying to be serious, "she may have a serious condition which makes her blush like a primrose whenever Uncle is near – yowch!"

Dwalin had elbowed the young lad without even looking. Kili burst out into very unmanly giggles, and Fili joined him for a brief moment. However, they continued undeterred.

"Yes, yes, she could be quite ill—do you feel at all well, Miss Bella? Why look, I do believe she's gone straight from primrose to tomato, you ought to see a doctor!"

Bella stood up suddenly and shoved her bowl into Ori's lap. "If you're all going to have a good laugh at my expense, I'd rather you do it when I'm not here to listen," she said, but her hearing seemed muffled beneath the blood pounding through her cheeks. "And perhaps that's chatting behind one's back, which is also quite rude, I might say, but it's far preferable to sitting here listening to you two prattle on."

"Ah, Miss Bella," Fili began, already looking sorry, "we didn't mean—"

"I need a breath of air, if you please," Bella managed to squeak out indignantly, and left in a whirl of skirts. She stormed off with as much poise as she could muster, before she tripped over a tree root and fell flat. Thankfully, she didn't hear those Dwarves laughing at her, but still, her knees smarted and she had dirt under her nails. Not to mention her bodice had soup on it, as well as a bit of mud.

They had made their camp by some running water, which was really too large to be called a stream but much too small to be called a river. She knelt on the shores and splashed some water onto her face. Already she was feeling ashamed for dashing off like she did, not to mention the boys would be terribly sorry in the morning. And she had to face them sometime. That was the problem with throwing a tantrum, it had to end sometime and then things were always just awkward.

Bella wondered vaguely if there wasn't some kind of spell Gandalf could put on her when he returned, to make her fall…out of love, or however the term went, with Thorin. Not that she was in love! It was just a crush. Her Tookish side acting up again, as one's arthritis might. And anyway, she was much too old to be having crushes on anyone, not to mention a moody sod of a Dwarrow whose cheek muscles would probably catch fire if he ever tried to smile.

She knew that if she stayed by the river much longer, someone would come and try to find her. And that would be horrible, just a simply dreadful idea.

"Miss Burglar," a deep, very familiar voice rumbled. Bella nearly had kittens, and turned around with a small shriek.

Thorin stopped advancing, standing at the treeline some ten feet away. "My apologies. I thought you had heard me coming." He said, sounding stiff.

Bella looked down at his big, clumpy boots who always hailed his coming with loud scraping, thumping sounds and wondered how she hadn't heard him coming up behind her. She seemed to be the quietest one of the lot, curse her padded Hobbit feet.

"Oh! Yes. I'm sorry, I…no, I didn't hear you come up, I was…" she gestured vaguely. Her blush, which had begun to die down, flared back onto her cheeks. He was looking at her, with those piercing blue eyes that seemed to see straight into her soul. Bother those eyes. Twice bother them, making her squirm around so much.

He seemed to be waiting for her to finish, and when she showed no signs of continuing, he sighed. "My nephews seek only cheap entertainment," he said quietly. "Which is a poor excuse for belittling another member of the company. They forget your feminine sensibilities, do forgive them."

Feminine sensibilities? Feminine sensibilities? She wasn't some fluffy-headed Proudfoot, prone to waxing poetic and languishing without a gentleman caller, she was at least part Took! And that had to count for something! She stiffened her back and her nose rose pertly. "Thank you, Master Oakenshield, for taking care of my feminine sensibilities," she said, and it came out much colder than intended. "I'll remember that when I'm facing down a dragon for you."

With nothing but the moonlight to illuminate his face, she couldn't be quite sure of his expression but he seemed angry. She waited, back straight and looking him in the eye for once, and when he didn't say anything she deflated a bit. Having a row wouldn't have solved anything, but it might make her feel a bit better. He met her gaze, but thanks to the shadows his glare seemed like any other glare, and after a few moments of silence she flounced past him. (As she drew nearer to the fire, she reminded herself not to flounce. Tookish Hobbits who went on adventures didn't flounce, they marched.)

Before she even reached the fire, she saw Fili and Kili already standing up, calling out apologies. She went straight up to them and hugged them both around the neck. Inwardly, she was still indignant, and she may have quivered a bit, but she was moderately steady.

"It's quite all right, gentlemen," she said, rousing up her Baggins' manners and dignity. "I was wrong to run off like that, you didn't mean any harm."

Thorin came back to camp and sat down heavily on the opposite side of the fire, as far away from Bella as possible. Bella glowered at him and said, mostly to Fili and Kili but hoping that prideful git would hear as well.

"And I should really thank you, since I believe you've cured me of whatever illness causes me to blush."

I have many weaknesses-one of them is Aberdeen, another is Bagginshield. This is rated T for now, but don't worry, we'll get to the smutty part soon. ;) -fyrelark