Epilogue

Kiba raised a hand to stop the blond from talking a single word more. The other hand was being used to pinch the bridge of his nose to stem the headache from overtaking every fiber of his being. "Hold up man, you've gotta lay it out for me better."

He was back in hidden leaf for the first time in what felt like years, but was actually only months. Not a lot had changed and not that many people heard the news that the world was saved… or even in danger in the first place. The two of them were in the middle of the street, right outside kage administration.

Naruto closed his mouth and gave the dog boy a big, toothy grin. "What's up man?"

The dog boy in question bent his legs a little bit and gently lowered his hands until he was staring at the palms. "…So, I know you got married off to five other chicks. I got that from that big announcement a few months. And I also know you went off with them to announce at the other major villages too, that makes sense. But… I just… What happened?"

Naruto shrugged, looking to the ground and to the side. "Well… we all hated each other at first and that wasn't too cool, but we all bonded as the days went on."

Kiba swirled his hand around, nodding. "Yeah, yeah, I got that. You and your magical ability to make friends with just about everybody and all that. Makes sense… But!"

Naruto held out his closed fist and stuck out one finger. "I fell in love with Temari in a way that's a bit hard to describe." He stuck out two fingers. "Fu was in love with me for a while and was okay with sharing, and Temari decided that she was okay with it too." He stuck out three fingers. "I fell in love with Yugito next, who was also okay with sharing." He stuck out four fingers. "Then Kurotsuchi, who I fell in love with at first, confessed, and now she's part of it all too."

Kiba looked like he had his soul sucked from him. He sighed, putting a hand to his head. "I guess I shoulda expected that. What about the last one? Wasn't she, like, thirty?"

A hand encircled around Kiba's shoulder like a vice. A palpable killing intent overflowed from behind him and threatened to drive him mad. "Who's thirty now, dog boy?" Mei asked serenely from behind him.

"You are, Mei," Naruto said, quirking an eyebrow with his arms crossed over his chest. Kiba whimpered slightly when Mei withdrew her hand and slowly walked to Naruto's side.

"I know, loverboy, I'm just teasing," she said, wrapping an arm around his back in a flirtatious way.

Kiba pointed a finger at Naruto and then Mei, looking like he'd just seen a ghost. "W-Wait, hold up. Her too? How old are you again?"

"She's just teasing," Naruto said, patting her on the back twice. She smiled like the world were made of roses and walked off.

"See you, darling," she said enticingly as she left.

"Mei's on her way to talk with the other kage," Naruto explained to a dumbfounded Kiba. "And no… we're not in that sort of relationship… yet."

"Yet."

Naruto nodded. "Maybe in the future. But I'm also happy where we are right now and she is too."

Kiba let out a breath of air slowly. "Okay. Cool. But that's not the biggest part of your goddamn story. What about the whole thing with saving the world?"

Naruto shrugged. "I mean, yeah, that was important and it did happen, but it's not like…" Naruto struggled for words for a little bit. "It's not like I was doing it because I wanted to save the world or anything, if that makes sense. I was just doing what I could and it kinda fell on me in the end. Honestly, I'm just glad we all made it through unscathed. Most of us, that is."

Kiba clicked his tongue. "Shit man, you're unbelievable. Why aren't you with them right now?"

Naruto put out his fist again and numbered them off. "Kurotsuchi's in rock with her dad. Fu's in waterfall getting her things. Yugito's in lightning saying goodbye to everyone. And Temari and Mei are at the meeting. I had some free time, so I decided I might as well catch up with everyone. And here we are. Where's Akamaru, by the way? You're usually inseparable."

"At the vet," Kiba murmured, hand to his mouth where he was biting his thumb. "Nobody's going to believe this… hold up, are you… staying here? You've got five wives that all live in different countries. How's the home situation going to work?"

"I'm going to try to see if I can't get somewhere on the border of here and water. Forests, mountains, and beaches. Now that's a place to stay."

"Didn't you want to become Hokage?"

Naruto looked to the side and bit his thumb slightly, much like Kiba. "I wanted a family and recognition and saw Hokage as the best way to get those things. But now I have a family and recognition doesn't really factor into anything. Maybe if I'm the best candidate for it, and everyone agrees it's for the best. Otherwise, I might just live with them."

"Like a housewife?" Kiba asked, brow cocked.

Naruto shrugged. "Hey, there's four of them and only one of me. I'm not sure if I'll have enough time in the day for work."

"Oooh, that was…" Kiba squeezed his eyes closed and recoiled away from the information slightly. "A little bit too much information."

Naruto's straight face broke and laughter bubbled out, causing Kiba to break out somewhat as well.

It was nice to be back.

"You know," Kiba said. "I'm not sure how into the idea of sharing you with five other chicks would be to Hinata, but you might want to talk to her and see how it might play out."

Naruto's eyebrows scrunched. "What are you talking about?"

Kiba blinked a few times. "Did you really not know?"

"Know what?"

"That Hinata has been in love with you since she was, like, eight."

Naruto was struck almost speechless. "Uhm… no, I didn't know that. Hold up, you're not joking with me, are you?"

And then, almost like there was divine providence in the world, the doors to kage administration opened and the five kages plus one Hinata Hyuuga poured out. Temari and Mei had an almost apologetic look on their faces, while Tsunade was grinning like a demon about to get her comeuppance, and Ai, Onoki, and Shibuki all were grinning ear to ear. In Hinata's hand was a piece of paper fluttering in the wind and she looked like she just won the lottery.

"Hey, Naruto, what a surprise meeting you here," Tsunade greeted like a demon. "Good news comes in sextuplets, you know. Say hello to your sixth wife," Tsunade nudged Hinata forward and she floated over to Naruto's side.

While he remained somewhat speechless, Tsunade decided to explain the backstory to him. "There was a lot of conflict in Konoha after your exit with everyone else and I was stuck here trying to deal with it for the longest time. Though… it turns out there was another contract your father signed with the head of the Hyuuga. A contract perfect for alleviating the civil conflict brewing. It didn't specify Hinata, but it had to be either her or her sister, as they were from the main family, and she so valiantly put herself forward to save her little sibling from being stuck in a loveless marriage. So… congratulations!"

Naruto looked to Temari and Mei for saving, but they only had conciliatory looks to give him. "Things were getting out of control," Temari said.

"And things were just getting settled when I got there," Mei admitted.

"Y-You're all okay with this?" Naruto asked.

"Please, I've had to come to terms with worse," Temari said. "If it helps save the world… And it turns out she was harboring wood for you, so… why not?"

Naruto looked over at Hinata, whose face was turning from red to purple at an alarming rate. "Hey, are you… can we talk privately about this?"

Whether she heard or not was anyone's guess. How she was still standing was also up for debate. She was there, but the embarrassment might as well have made her dead to the world.

"Christ," Naruto said, putting his face in his hands. "The others are going to kill me. Wait, hold up. They aren't going to kill me," he pointed at Mei and Temari "You're the ones who decided this!"

He looked over to Kiba for support, but the dog boy was currently doubled over on the ground with both hands over his mouth, shuddering from laughter he couldn't vocalize.

Temari and Mei flanked him, each grabbed a hand, and started leading him to a supposedly more safe place with Hinata in tow, having been grabbed by Mei.

"Come on loverboy, no rest for the weary."

"Is your plan of action for keeping the world at peace just to marry me off to greater numbers of women throughout the years?" Naruto asked.

"Keep an attitude like that and we just might consider it," Temari said, doing her best to lighten the mood.

Naruto sighed. "On to the next adventure, I guess."