Chapter 1: Will I see you, or will I lose you again?

Is Kakashi-sensei away on a mission outside the village?

...

...I see…

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Pain was dead. Nagato was dead.

It was a strange feeling, to go from hating one's enemy to sympathizing with them, all in the span of a few hours. So many things had happened in that time, and so much had changed…

He had been confused and even doubtful at first when Nagato sought redemption in sacrifice. He still dared not believe what had happened, despite what Katsuyu had told him - he needed to see it for himself, to see (him) everyone alive again.

There was something Nagato had said which made him uneasy.

The man had paused, briefly, just as he was about to end his resurrection jutsu, and then raised his head to look at Naruto with eyes full of deep sadness and regret.

"I'm sorry," Nagato had said to him. "I tried."

He'd felt a strange numbness in the tips of his fingers at those words, even though he had not known what they'd meant.

The forest was strangely quiet as he slowly made his way back. His feet were like lead and dragged in the ground as he walked, pausing every few steps to brace himself against a tree. He wondered if the village would be just as silent, like it had been when he had arrived upon the scene of disaster.

Sage Mode would give him the answer to all his questions. He knew he had not the chakra for it, and yet he had to try...

Naruto closed his eyes for only a moment, but he was already falling.

The impact of hitting the ground sent a jolt of pain through his entire body. He let himself lie there for minutes that felt like eternities, squeezing his eyes shut to hold back the hot, angry tears that threatened to spill forth.

He had hoped someone would come.

The numbness was spreading. He could feel it in his limbs as he pushed himself up inch by inch, holding on to the tree trunk with a grip so tight his fingernails dug into the bark.

There was blood on his mouth. A split lip, from when he had smashed his face into the ground. He ignored it and continued walking.

He wished someone would find him, for the wait was unbearable. Katsuyu had been silent since they left the false tree where Nagato and Konan had concealed themselves, preoccupied with passing information to her divisions and telling him nothing. There was nothing to do but to continue walking… and while he dared not believe, he hoped that he would finally meet with someone when he was nearing the village.

But nobody came.

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The noise of the joyful village was almost deafening after the silence of the forest. The villagers cheered upon his arrival, rushing forward to thank him and welcome him back. His heartbeat quickened.

If they're all alive, then…

"I told them everything that happened," Katsuyu said quietly.

He was saved from being overwhelmed by the crowd when Sakura made her way through. He stepped forward to greet her, but the words died upon his lips when he saw her stricken expression.

She had been crying.

He felt suddenly very cold. The numbness was spreading again, creeping up his arms into his neck, his chest, and settling into a peculiar feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"Sakura-chan," he began hoarsely, voice cracking as he forced the words out. "Where's Kakashi-sensei?"

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He did not cry until he saw the body.

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Kakashi had been dug out of the rubble by someone and laid on the ground. He was still there when Naruto found him, after a frantic search through the village.

Naruto fell to his knees beside the body of his former teacher.

It could not be true.

"Hey, sensei…" He reached a shaking hand towards the bloodstained silver hair, gingerly brushing it to the side. "You're hurt."

Kakashi's eyes remained closed.

"Did you push yourself too hard again? You must have… you've been bleeding. I've never seen you in such a state."

Trembling fingers ghosted over the familiar scar, over the mask which even now concealed half of Kakashi's face, and came to rest at the side of his neck.

"Aren't you supposed to call me to help when you're in trouble? I would've come… I would've helped you."

No pulse.

"This is some kind of illusion, right…? You must've came back. Everyone else did. This can't be true."

He pulled open Kakashi's flak jacket and pressed his hand, and then his ear, against the man's chest.

"This can't… I can't…"

No heartbeat.

Naruto pulled on all the nature energy he could gather and felt the chakra presence of every last person in the village, except…

An empty void next to him, where Kakashi's chakra should've been. Where Kakashi should've been.

Naruto gave a choked sob.

"I can't lose you again."

But he already had.

will

modal verb

1. Expressing the future tense.

1.1. Expressing a strong intention or assertion about the future.

- Oxford English Dictionary

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Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad fic idea. Chapter 2 is currently undergoing edits. Working title: Will you never return?

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