Title: Doing The Dirty

Disclaimer: Not mine. Yay.

Summary: Adam teaches Cee Cee about the art of sexual innuendos. Don't be mislead by the title.

This story was completely random and sort of spur of the moment sort of thing. My other story, Remembrance, was making me sad so I put this happy chappie up. It's a one-shot. Yeah …… It's a bit vague.

For those don't know what a boomerang is … oh just go look it up.

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"Oh Jesse, put that away!" Suze giggled through the phone.

I rolled my eyes at Adam.

"Yeah, um, sorry Cee… I ... uuuhh... can't go to the beach today … because…. I'm a bit busy so …. Bye!"

I heard the familiar sound of beeping, telling me she'd hung up.

Sigh.

"I am extremely sorry to inform you Mr McTavish, that your dearest Suze will not be accompanying us to glorious place that is Carmel beach because she is to busy being entertained by a Sir Jesse De Silva."

Adam turned to face me, a slight smirk appearing on his face.

"Pray, do tell me what this entertainment consist of, Miss Webb? And why hasn't she invited us to join her?"

Yay! Foursome! NOT.

"Don't fear, Adam dear, for from the sounds of it they are, or soon will be, performing an act known as "Doing The Dirty"." I said, getting bored of talking about Suze.

I mean, it was my idea to go to the beach, and it was my bed in my bedroom that he was sitting on, and all he could talk about was Suze and her vair vair entertaining boyfriend. Not that I'd know whether he was entertaining or not, I'm just relying on what Suze tells me. Because I don't have a boyfriend.

"Doing the Dirty? That's lame. Is that some kind o - OH MY GOD!"

What was his problem?

'What?"

"OH. MY. GOD."

He looked so horrified, he was actually quivering. Oh shit, what If I had something on my face?

"WHAT IS IT? GET IT OFF!"

"Cee," he lowered his voice to a whisper, "Do you know what you've done?"

Oh no. I've done something. How will the world cope?

"Cee Cee ….. You made a sexual innuendo!"

Oh. My. God.

I made a sexual Innuendo.

"Was it …. Was it funny?"

I felt like hitting myself after saying that, I mean, here I was sitting with the KING of sexual Innuendo's, so of course it wasn't funny.

Besides, if it was funny, he'd be laughing wouldn't he? WOULDN'T HE?

Gosh, I'm so in-experienced at all this!

"I don't know, I'm still getting over the shock." He answered me, after what seemed like an eternity of shocked staring. Not that it wasn't nice to have him sit there ogling me, but you know, it wasn't for the reasons I would've liked.

Anyway, I just sat there, nodding dumbly.

I mean, I was still getting over the shock as well.

"But you know Cee Cee m'dear, with a good teacher, A.K.A. Me, Myself and I … gee that sounded lame, but anyway, with just a little practice and a little leaning, because of course I'll share my great knowledge with you, you'll be perfect at sexual innuendos in no time.

"Because, you must understand m'dear that Sexual Innuendos is no joke. It's an art. You must learn to perfect the timing, the sentence structure the idea, and the relevance to the situation. Or un-relevance."

I remembered the time we went on a school excursion to Australia, and Adam ended up getting his nose punched in about ten times because of all the innuendo's he made about the use of boomerangs.

"So Cee Cee, What you have to learn is- "

Look, it's not that Adam doesn't have a nice voice its just ….. I had to shut him up.

So I did.

By kissing him.

On the lips.

Shut up, It was the only thing I could think of ……………………………………… … …………………

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………. WHAT THE HELL?

HE WAS KISSING ME BACK.

FGSJDFBGKSHDFGHSDHSGH.

I, Cee Cee Webb, was being kissed by Adam McTavish.

And I was enjoying it.

This had to stop.

"Adam," I panted, Gee how did we both end up on the bed? "What … are … you .. doing?"

Adam grinned, his brown eyes lighting up with something … not very innocent.

"What, are you slow or something Webb? Or has the blinding pleasure of my kisses driven you to- "

I cut him of with a very regal glare.

"Adam, do you want this this? Is this real? Do you even like me? That way, I mean ….…."

I blushed furiously and tried to bury my head but he placed his fingers on my chin and lifted my face up to his. His eyes were no longer playful, but sincere.

"No. I don't like you. I love you,"he said,"I've loved you since I first saw you, when we you crying in class because the teacher had spelled your name wrong. You were always very literal Cee. But that's another reason why I love you."

I panicked, deep down, I knew I'd always wanted this, but I'd never imagined it would happen.

"But- "

"Yes Cee Cee I do have a very attractive butt don't I?"

I was about to say something, but he took advantage of my open mouth.

In other words, he kissed me. Again.

MMmMmMmMmMmMmmmmmmmmm. That was nice.

He pulled away after a minute, leaving me heavy lidded and dizzy.

"Your lips… are like…. Two sausages …"

"Yeah, well your ... lips are like … mushy bananas," he said, sounding just as dizzy as me.

I smiled at him, batting my eyelashes the way Kelly does when she sees Paul Slater or Brad Ackerman or any hot guy for that matter.

"Well Adam, m'dear, these mushy bananas request the presence of your two sausages. Now."

"Oh trust me," He said, before leaning down to kiss me, "These two sausages are only to willing to oblige."

And that is how Cee Webb and Adam McTavish became a couple.

Did I mention that five minutes later Aunt Pru walked in on them while they were making out?

Yes darling, apparently she already saw it in the cards.

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