A/N: I think I found the one loophole in my anti-writing two multi-chapter stories at the same time stance I have taken. I don't know why I keep writing these one-shots. This is a sequel of sorts to my other one-shot "Brotherly Love." I mean I guess it's sequel-ish. *shrugs shoulders* I so want to say something pessimistic right now like, "I doubt this will be as popular as 'Brotherly Love' was though." However, I won't. I'll just bite my tongue. Ouch! That hurts!
Disclaimer: One day I'm going to look back at this and realize that these accursed disclaimers were what caused my downward spiral into untreatable depression. I own nothing. *dies*
Cover Boys
James was in Apartment 2J sifting through the day's mail when he came across the newest edition of only the greatest magazine in all of forever—Pop Tiger. All the other mail was forgotten as it spilled onto the counter; some of it even spilling over the counter onto the kitchen floor. James had waited seven long, agonizing days for this, for Pop Tiger was a weekly publication.
However, he took one look at the cover before letting out a high-pitched scream not unlike one you would hear from a girl. His eyes had bugged out and widened more than he thought eyes could even widen. His jaw had dropped. He clamped a hand over his mouth too little too late. If someone had heard his girlish scream, James clamping his hand over his mouth now wasn't going to fix that. Words were on the tip of his tongue, but he remained stuttering like an idiot in nonsensical syllables.
"Hey James, what are you doing? Was that you I just heard scream like a girl?" Logan asked walking into the kitchen.
James chuckled nervously before quickly hiding the evidence behind his back. Just his luck, out of all the people who had to join James in the kitchen, it had to be Logan.
"Oh, never mind. I see the mail strewn about over the counter and floor. You must have got the newest edition of Pop Tiger magazine today, didn't you? You know, I can't believe you read that garbage. That stuff is worse than TMZ. Hmm…who knew that was even possible?" Logan commented.
"This coming from the person who subscribes to a doctor magazine. About the only thing that is good for is putting me to sleep quickly," James retorted.
Logan rolled his eyes at James. James walked sideways past Logan, making certain to not turn his back on him. He didn't want to risk Logan swiping his magazine. It was simple—Logan could not see the cover.
"Uh…James, are you feeling okay? What is with you today? Why are you acting so weird? You're screaming like a girl. You're all jumpy. You're trying, unsuccessfully mind you, to sneak past me without being seen," Logan said.
"No reason. Even if there was a reason, which there isn't, it has absolutely nothing to do with the cover of the magazine I'm holding," James blurted out.
He held on to the magazine with one of his hands. He used his other hand to slap himself on the forehead. James couldn't believe he just said that.
"Okay, I have to admit; now I'm kind of curious. Let me see," Logan replied.
"No!" James exclaimed before making a mad dash for the bathroom.
Logan was hot on his tail. The more James tried to evade him, the more intrigued Logan became. Now he really wanted to see the latest edition of James' beloved Pop Tiger magazine.
It wasn't long before Logan had James cornered in the bathroom. He reached behind James' back with both of his hands, but James retaliated by holding it out in front of him, now behind Logan's back.
"Let me see it, James!" Logan exclaimed.
"It's not that big of a deal!" James retorted.
"I think I'll be the judge of that!"
Kendall and Carlos exchanged confused glances with one another. First they heard James shriek like a girl. Now, they heard Logan yelling at James about him wanting to see something of James'. They went to investigate, and saw what looked like two of their best friends…hugging?
Kendall made a 'quiet' gesture to Carlos before he alerted James and Logan to their presence. In their haste, James and Logan had left the bathroom door wide open. Kendall and Carlos could see everything.
Kendall was mostly joking when he had said that James and Logan have a thing for each other. Frankly, he was relieved that both James and Logan were fully clothed. The four of them had changed in front of each other before being on the same hockey team and whatnot, but when Kendall heard Logan ask to see something of James'…well, Kendall was just glad Logan hadn't meant what Kendall thought he meant.
James now held his magazine high above his head. Logan stood up on his tiptoes, and grabbed for it, but James was not only taller than Logan, but James also had longer arms.
"James, just let me take a quick peek," Logan whined.
Mrs. Knight had just walked in the front door, carrying two arms full of groceries. Upon hearing Logan say what he just said, her jaw wasn't the only thing that dropped. The two sacks of groceries fell to the floor, their contents spilling out. She did an about face, and decided to come back to the apartment at a later time. She didn't even want to know what James and Logan were up to this time.
"Why the sudden interest?" James countered.
"You're obviously trying to hide something from me, and I want to know what it is!" Logan exclaimed, trying and failing again to grab James' magazine.
Logan's back was to the bathroom door, but James' wasn't. He saw that they had an audience. His face flushed in embarrassment. He was horrified by how this must have sounded to Kendall and Carlos.
"Kendall and Carlos!" James exclaimed.
James froze in his tracks. Logan quickly snatched the magazine from James. After taking one glance at the cover, he let out a high-pitched squeak before tossing the offending magazine in the air. It landed in the shower, hidden behind the shower curtain.
"Uh…are we interrupting something?" Carlos questioned.
Kendall started cracking up, and elbowed Carlos in the ribs.
"Carlos!" he said good-naturedly.
James and Logan realized the compromising position they were in. It looked like the two of them were hugging each other. James arms had dropped, and it looked like his arms were wrapped around Logan. To add to the awkwardness, the position of his hands made it look like he was grabbing Logan's butt. Meanwhile, after tossing the evidence, Logan's arms had dropped as well. He had his arms wrapped around James' neck. Needless to say, the two of them instantly sprang apart.
Logan held his hands out in front of him innocently.
"Guys, this isn't what it looks like," Logan assured them.
"Really, because it kind of looked like the two of you were groping each other," Kendall commented.
"Groping!" Carlos remarked, before cracking up.
Logan's face turned a beet red as he flushed with embarrassment. Similarly, James could feel his cheeks heat up as well. This was so humiliating. Kendall and Carlos were never going to let the two of them live this down. It was one thing to hear from Mrs. Knight about James and Logan being in compromising positions, but it was completely different for Kendall and Carlos to witness it firsthand.
"F.Y.I we were not groping each other! Furthermore, I was only trying to see why James was making such a big fuss about the newest issue of Pop Tiger magazine," Logan said.
James backhanded Logan in the chest. Logan flinched and gave James a "WTF?" look.
"Dude, ix-nay on the agazine-may!" James whispered.
Carlos looked up at the ceiling deep in thought. He was trying to figure out what the heck James just said to Logan.
"Now I want to see," Kendall commented, before trying to find the discarded magazine.
James and Logan wasted no time getting in Kendall's way, blocking him off from the shower, and the magazine on its floor.
"Absolutely not!" James remarked.
"As it turned out, it wasn't a big deal at all. James was just being overly dramatic as usual, weren't you, James?" Logan asked, clapping James in the back forcefully.
Mrs. Knight chanced returning to the apartment. She stepped one foot inside.
"Dude, did you really have to be so rough?" James commented.
"Says the guy who slapped my pecs!" Logan retorted.
"What pecs?"
"Unbelievable!" Mrs. Knight muttered to herself before leaving Apartment 2J for a second time.
James and Logan were surprised, not to mention mortified when Katie appeared behind Kendall and Carlos. She was holding in her hands the newest edition of Pop Tiger magazine. James and Logan had totally forgotten all about Katie subscribing to the magazine as well. Kendall stopped going for the magazine James and Logan were blocking, and grabbed the one his little sister was holding. Carlos was at his side, looking as well.
"James and Logan of the new up and coming band, Big Time Rush, BFF's: Boyfriends forever?" Kendall read out loud.
Kendall, Carlos, and Katie were all snickering. James rubbed the back of his neck and chuckled nervously. Logan simply fainted. James caught him before he hit the floor. When Katie, Kendall, and Carlos gave him a knowing look, James let go of Logan and let him fall to the floor.
"Logan and I are not boyfriends! I mean he's a friend that's a boy, but he's not my boyfriend! I'm straight! I like girls! Girls love me!" James shouted.
"Maybe you're bi then," Katie replied, before laughing.
James narrowed his eyes at Katie, who was completely oblivious.
"Besides, there's no proof! It's all just gossip!" James retorted.
"Oh really? We'll just see about that," Kendall said, before opening up the magazine and flipping to the corresponding article.
Logan rose to his feet just in time to hear Kendall read the article. Logan shook his head, trying to clear the cobwebs.
"Guys in boy bands are often rumored to be gay, but when it comes to James Diamond and Logan Mitchell of a new up and coming boy band, Big Time Rush, maybe it's not just a rumor. According to one source, the two were seen rolling around the floor affectionately…perhaps a little too affectionately. Video of the band mates frolicking has already surfaced online where it has received over two million views as of this publication. One thing is for certain: James and Logan give new meaning to the term 'BFF.' Maybe instead of 'Best Friends Forever,' it means 'Boyfriends forever!'" Kendall read.
"Ooh! Look! There are even stills of the two of you rolling around the floor together!" Carlos exclaimed.
"Oh, I think I'm going to be sick," Logan remarked.
"Guys, you can't possibly be buying this! You've known us for how long now? Eleven years? You know we're not gay!" James commented.
Before Kendall, Carlos, or Katie could respond, all five of them were blinded by the flashes of numerous cameras. The paparazzi had found James and Logan and were now swarming around them. There were film crews, reporters, and microphones.
"James, Logan, are the rumors true? Are the two of you boyfriends?" one reporter asked.
"Do you have anything to say about the latest issue of Pop Tiger magazine?" a second reporter asked.
"What do you have to say to all your fans out there?" a third reporter asked.
After that, James and Logan couldn't really make out any of the questions, because the reporters started talking at the same time and talking over one another. All the while, cameras snapped photos of the two of them.
"Run!" James and Logan replied simultaneously, exchanging glances with one another.
Kendall, Carlos, and Katie were thoroughly amused watching James and Logan try to run from the paparazzi. Kendall kind of felt bad for the two of them. He knew all too well what it was like to be hounded by paparazzi. Of course, the reason Kendall had been ambushed by the paparazzi was completely different than the reason James and Logan were being stalked by the paparazzi. Kendall just thought about that, before all sympathy was lost, and he was just amused.
"You guys want to watch the video?" Carlos asked.
"Do you even have to ask?" Katie replied, before she, Kendall, and Carlos went to get the laptop.
Meanwhile, James and Logan sought refuge inside the elevator. As the elevator began its descent, James was alarmed when Logan pushed the 'Emergency Stop' button. He arched his eyebrows at his alleged 'boyfriend.'
"Dude, what are you doing?" James screamed.
"Oh, I'm sorry. Would you rather be out there with the paparazzi, or in here with me?" Logan replied.
"You do realize that when you say stuff like that, how people could get the wrong idea, right?"
"It's a little late for that. We're trapped in an elevator…alone."
James pressed his forehead against one of the interior walls of the elevator, and pounded his fist against the wall repeatedly. Logan stood as far away from James as the elevator allowed, and had his arms folded over his chest. He didn't even want to look at James. It was his fault the two of them were in this mess. If he hadn't scratched the pair of shoes in the first place. If he hadn't convinced Logan to wear 'just one,' then none of this would have happened. In fact, if James wouldn't have touched the sneakers at all, and just left them in the box, they wouldn't be in this mess.
"What I want to know is how someone could have got pictures and video of us…" James started to say.
James and Logan both looked at each other. Realization dawned on them at the exact same time.
"The Sheik!" they exclaimed.
The only three people who could have possibly recorded James and Logan rolling around on the floor together were The Sheik, his bodyguard, or Mrs. Knight. It probably wasn't Mrs. Knight, unless she had a camera hidden amidst the clothes in the laundry basket she had been carrying. It probably wasn't the bodyguard. He was holding the suitcase of money the whole time. Unless there was a hidden camera in the suitcase of money. James and Logan were convinced that it was in fact The Sheik—the rich patron who was supposed to buy the pair of sneakers from them for three thousand dollars.
"Thanks a lot, Logan!" James remarked sarcastically. "If you hadn't ruined the sneakers, my rep wouldn't be ruined!"
"Your rep? Your rep? Boohoo! Cry me a river, James! The last thing I'm worried about right now is your rep!" Logan exclaimed.
James walked over to Logan and shoved him roughly. Logan wasted no time shoving James back. James tackled Logan to the ground, and the two of them were rolling around on the floor of the elevator, jockeying for position. Both boys wanted to be on top.
"I wasn't joking when I said that you are now my fourth best friend!" James commented.
"And I wasn't joking when I said that you don't have any best friends!" Logan retaliated.
James was bigger and stronger, and managed to end up on top of Logan. However, from the bottom, Logan managed to see something troubling.
"Camera!" Logan shouted.
"What?" James replied, confused.
"There's a camera inside the elevator, and it's been recording everything! Now, get off me!"
Logan shoved James off of him, and the two sprang apart as far as the confines of the elevator would allow them.
"Oh, come on!" James exclaimed.
Logan's head sank when he realized that the two of them just couldn't catch a break.
Meanwhile, Mr. Bitters was in his office watching the security footage, when he saw what was going on between James and Logan in the elevator. He spit out his French fries in disbelief.
"I don't believe it! It's true!" he exclaimed.
The End
A/N: Ironically, "Boyfriend" is playing as I type this Author's Note. I know this was pretty wild and wacky. I hope you liked it though. I should probably end this before I give in to my pessimism again…