Chapter One:

Gilberta's eyes opened at the sound of the alarm. Sighing, she turned her alarm clock off and stumbled into the washroom. Fuck, another day of school. Gilberta rolled her magnificent red eyes. Time to get ready.

Ludwig was already awake and making breakfast when Gilberta walked down the stairs. "Hello schwester," Ludwig greeted as Gilberta plopped down across from him. "Are you sure you should be going to school wearing that?" he asked in concern. Gilberta looked confused.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, looking down at her ripped black AC/DC shirt and her dark demin torn jeans.

"You look like you're a criminal," Ludwig informed her. Gilberta rolled her eyes. "And what did you do to your eyes? You look like you have two black eyes!" Ludwig exclaimed.

"Chill bro it's called eyeliner and eye shadow. It's a girl thing," Gilberta informed him.

"Gilberta, I don't think Vati would like you going to school wearing that," Ludwig said nervously. Gilberta scowled.

"Hey! It's Gilbert or nothing – got it?" Gilberta said testily. She rather disliked having such an ugly name. She wouldn't have minded having an actual feminine name but no, her vati and mutti had to name her after her great-grandfather instead of giving her a proper awesome name.

"I don't understand why you would want to be referred to with a boy name, really I don't," Ludwig said, clearly perplexed. Gilberta rolled her eyes.

"You don't understand much do you?" she teased. "You don't get anything about me or about your pretty little boyfriend," she continued, laughing as Ludwig turned pink.

"Boyfriend? I don't know what you're talking about," Ludwig stammered as Gilberta laughed.

"Please. Half the school knows about you and Feliciano," Gilberta told him as Ludwig turned a darker shade of red.

"Feliciano is just an extremely aggravating boy who won't leave me alone," Ludwig said quickly. Gilberta's left eyebrow [and eyebrow piercing] rose.

"That's not what Kiku told me," she sang out. Ludwig looked astonished.

"What is Kiku doing talking to you?" Ludwig said in shock. Gilberta looked offended.

"What's that supposed to mean? What if me and Kiku are secretly dating?" Gilberta shot at him. "How about that?" Ludwig paled.

"You are?" he yelped. Even though Gilberta was just kidding, she was still offended Ludwig seemed to be so horrified. She always did like quiet shy boys.

"I was only kidding Luddy," Gilberta said rolling her eyes. "You need to stop being so uptight or else you'll end up exactly like Ronnie." The both of them shuddered simultaneously. Veronika Edelstein was their snobby rich cousin. She was rarely seen without her obnoxious jerk of a boyfriend Eli and together the two of them made Gilberta sick. Veronika chastised Gilberta on her choice of music and Eli always tried to get Gilberta to make out with some random girl. Just because Gilberta was rather tomboyish didn't mean she was lesbian. Far from it actually. A buzzing sound from her phone interrupted their now silent eating. "Ooh it's from Toni – I gotta go meet him and Francis at the parking lot in exactly 15 minutes," Gilberta explained as she grabbed the leftover pieces of bacon in her bare hands and ran to her car. "Have fun in grade 10, bruder!" she sang out as she ran out the door. Ludwig sighed.

"I honestly don't understand why she chooses to spend her time with boys rather than with her own gender," he muttered to himself before clearing up the table. Their Vati and Mutti were gone somewhere in another country for business work so he and his older sister were left in the house alone. It wasn't so bad though – Ludwig just had to make sure Gilberta didn't hold random parties or come home crazy drunk with an equally drunk guy in tow. And because he normally couldn't do that, he made sure to be far, far away from all the action.

"Ve… Ludwig, can I come out now?" a voice said from under the table. Ludwig sighed. Feliciano Vargas, the bane to his existence [and also his best friend] always had an annoying tendency to somehow manage to sneak into the Beilschmidt residence and crawl into bed with Ludwig. Ludwig usually managed to wake up at least an hour after Feliciano's arrival to kick him out before his Vati, Mutti or worse – Gilberta could discover the Italian. Today, however, Ludwig had been having a rather nice dream and it was already time to get up [5 AM]. When he had rolled over, he was horrified to see Feliciano still lying there.

"Yes you can Feliciano – and hurry!" Ludwig looked around nervously. What if Gilberta came back because she forgot something? What if Vati and Mutti's business meeting in Germany ended early and they decided to come home to surprise him and Gilberta? Ludwig swallowed thickly. Feliciano popped up from under the table.

"Ludwig, cheer up! It's the first day of school! Grade 10 sounds like lots of fun! Well, my older sister says it's awful and full of torture but that's when she met Antonio so grade 10 can't be bad right? I hope I have a nice homeroom teacher – don't you? Hey Ludwig do you think there will be pretty girls in my class? Ve~ I like pretty girls," Feliciano rambled as Ludwig grabbed his backpack and headed outside.

"Blackie, Aster, Berlitz – guard," Ludwig commanded as he locked the door. The three Dobermans stood up, alert as Ludwig and his chatty friend walked away from the Beilschmidt residence. "And Feliciano, calm down! I don't know what you're saying!" Ludwig exclaimed. Feliciano blushed.

"Sorry Ludwig – I'm just so excited~" Feliciano said, running ahead of Ludwig and spinning around in circles excitedly. Ludwig himself couldn't be too worried about grade 10 – Gilberta had said grade 10 was a total bore and the only use it had for her was to lose her virginity to the cute Greek boy in her German class [why Gilberta chose to take German instead of any other language was beyond him].

Besides, he had worse things to worry about. Like, did Feliciano happen to hear what Gilberta had said about them dating? Ludwig felt something knot up in his stomach. If he did – what would his reaction be? Ludwig knew Feliciano's family was very religious and wasn't quite sure he'd be very happy about that idea – not that it was true or anything. They weren't dating. Definitely weren't dating. Ludwig didn't even have a crush on Feliciano! Not that Ludwig liked guys or anything. No. Ludwig liked… well actually, Ludwig didn't quite know what he liked. But he was sure it was girls. Didn't he used to have a really, really big crush on a pretty girl who lived next door to the Beilschmidt family when he was 5?

"Come on Ludwig let's go! I wanna see all of our friends again! It's been so long!" Feliciano exclaimed impatiently, already forgetting that he had spent every waking summer minute with said friends. Ludwig sighed.

"I'm coming," Ludwig muttered, kicking a pebble in frustration before joining Feliciano, fervently hoping nobody thought they were a couple or anything as they made their way to school.

Sometimes life was just not fair.

"Goodbye father!" Elizabeth Eleanor Kirkland sang out as her father, a well known business man, drove away from her sight. The moment he was out of view Elizabeth's perfect smile turned into a scowl.

"Careful honey or that'll be permanent," a voice said behind Elizabeth. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"Hello Gilbert," Elizabeth said as she pulled her pigtails out and shook her blonde hair out. "Can you hold my bag for a second?" she asked. Gilberta rolled her eyes.

"Same old, same old," Gilberta said as Elizabeth tossed her the bag and hurried into the trees nearby.

"Oh shut up – you know how much I loathe the clothes my parents make me wear," Elizabeth replied as she emerged wearing skinny jeans and a shirt not unlike the one Gilberta was wearing. Gilberta tossed the British girl her backpack and Elizabeth pulled out a makeup case to apply eyeliner.

"I still don't get why your parents want to dress you like you're still 4," Gilberta remarked as Elizabeth put on her backpack, her vivid green eyes glittering brightly, the eyeliner bringing out the colour in her eyes.

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "They're afraid that the moment they start letting me act my own age I'll start doing things like drinking and having sex," she replied. Gilberta burst out laughing.

"Pity you've already started on both, eh?" Gilberta teased, nudging Elizabeth. Elizabeth blushed a deep red.

"I didn't mean to do the second one," Elizabeth muttered, making Gilberta laugh some more.

"And with Francis of all people!" Gilberta exclaimed. Elizabeth glared at her.

"Don't mention his name to me – ever," Elizabeth hissed and Gilberta smirked. Francis Bonnefoy and Elizabeth had been long time enemies – their rivalry going back to their childhood. The two of them never went a few minutes without mauling each other which made it even more amusing to Gilberta how Elizabeth ended up having drunken sex with him.

"Oh come on it's so obvious what's going on between the two of you," Gilberta said loudly as Elizabeth trailed beside her.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Elizabeth said haughtily. Gilberta grinned.

"Everybody knows about the 'secret' sexual tension going on between the two of you," Gilberta said. "Even Feliciano's aware of it and the kid's the densest thing on earth!" she added as Elizabeth turned positively purple with indignation.

"There is nothing going on between us!" Elizabeth exclaimed.

"Of course there isn't," Gilberta said winking.

"Can we change the subject please? I'm starting to get a migraine," Elizabeth growled.

"Ok then… so Feliciano stayed over again," Gilberta remarked casually. Elizabeth's left eyebrow rose.

"Did he now? Did Ludwig attempt to make him leave before you woke up?" Elizabeth asked. Gilberta laughed.

"Nope! I saw him push Feliciano under the table when I came downstairs – guess he didn't wake up in time," Gilberta replied. "The two of them really need to admit their feelings to each other. It's boring watching Ludwig act all shy around him – why can't Ludwig just get that he likes Feli and start dating the kid already?" Gilberta said. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"It's not that easy – Ludwig's a good kid – he always listens to your parents. How are your parents gonna take him dating another boy?"

"The way they took my eyebrow piercing and my purple lowlights – Vati will fume and yell for a few hours and Mutti will cry about how her little babies were growing up and getting ready to leave her forever and then the next morning they'll treat it as if nothing bad had happened," Gilberta replied casually. Elizabeth sighed.

"I wish my family was like that… if I tried anything as bad as what you usually get away with I'd be murdered on the spot," Elizabeth replied. "If something threatens to ruin the perfect Kirkland name it must be eliminated. And speaking of my family – my cousin and her step-brother are coming to our school," Elizabeth added. Gilberta's pierced eyebrow rose.

"Yay? Nay?"

"Nay – Alyssa's the biggest idiot anybody could ever meet. She thinks she's the best at everything and that she's some sort of hero because she likes butting her nose in other peoples' business and 'helping' them out."

"What about the step-brother?"

"Never met him – Aunt Emily married his dad a few months ago and Auntie Em and Al decided to move from Kansas up here in Canada to join their new family."

"Name?"

"Why do you care? Are you going to make him your latest victim?"

"You make it sound like I'm Francis."

"I told you to never mention his name in front of me!"

"Oh, sorry. You make it sound like I'm He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named."

"Well you do have a tendency to either date or bully the hell out of the boys in our grade."

"I'm not that bad!"

"Of course you aren't."

"So what's the kid's name?"

Elizabeth paused, frowning. "I actually don't know. Michael? Alex? Alfred – no wait, that's an awful name – who'd name their kid that? Erm, Harry? None of those names fit…"

Gilberta rolled her eyes. "Trust you to forget your own cousin's name," she teased.

"Hey well look at that! If it isn't my two favourite lesbian lovers!" a voice said loudly behind them. The girls froze.

"Eli," Gilberta growled. Elizabeth gave her friend a worried look. Gilberta and Eli Héderváry had known each other since they were children – back when they were next door neighbours and back when Eli was under the impression he was a girl. The two of them had been best of friends up until one faithfully scarring day when the two of them decided to go swimming in the nearby pond and Eli had revealed to not be a girl but in fact, a boy. Gilberta had never forgiven him for scarring her horribly and Eli proceeded to assume that since Gilberta had been so horrified at seeing his 'manhood' she must not like boys. Since then the two of them had been butting heads and their relationship managed to get even worse the moment Eli started dating Gilberta's snobby cousin Veronika.

"Oh I'm sorry – was I interrupting something? Were you guys gonna start making out or something?" Eli asked, a freaky glint appearing in his eyes. Eli seemed to have some sort of lesbian fetish and seemed to enjoy the thought of two girls making out in front of him. Gilberta and Elizabeth shuddered in unison.

"God no – we were just discussing that day when Veronika got drunk and kissed that new student – the one from Switzerland, right?" Gilberta said, nudging Elizabeth discretely.

"What? Oh right – we were. It was so shocking – nobody thought that the new girl was into that sort of thing but there they were!" Elizabeth added. Eli's eyes widened.

"My Ronnie? Kissing other girls? When I'm not there? I need to go find Kiku and see if he got footage of that!" Eli said with obscene relish before running off away from the girls.

"Pervert!" Gilberta cried out as he ran off. "Urgh he's so weird – I honestly don't know what my cousin sees in him! He's such a pansy too – I mean, what kinda guy wears a flower in his hair?" she fumed at Elizabeth.

Elizabeth shrugged. "The same type who dates a stuck up bitch like Veronika?" Elizabeth asked. She shuddered suddenly. "My father is making me go to her house on Saturday," Elizabeth added, wincing as Gilberta let out a horrified scream.

"Whoa! You're going to Ronnie's house on Saturday? How can you let yourself subject to such horror!" Gilberta cried out.

"I'm not! My father's forcing me to!" Elizabeth replied. "It's awful – he thinks I need to have more culture in my life and is making play the violin alongside Veronika's piano!"

"So you let your Vati arrange a 'play date' with my snobby cousin?"

"There wasn't anything I could do! Father had his 'you-better-listen-or-else' look on. I can't believe I'm going to be spending my Saturday playing Chopin with Miss 'I'm A Better Musician Than You'll Ever Be!" Elizabeth said in anguish.

"LIZZIE!" a voice suddenly cried from out of nowhere. Gilberta barely had time to react as a blur tacked Elizabeth to the ground.

"Whaa-oof! Al? Get off of me!" Elizabeth cried out as Gilberta watched a rather scantily clad girl hug Elizabeth tightly. "AL!"

"You still have such a funny accent," the girl said standing up as Elizabeth got up to her feet and shot her a dirty look. Gilberta hardly thought the girl could talk – she had one of those drawling accents that made Gilberta think of cowboys, Brokeback Mountain and Hannah Montana. The girl suddenly glanced at Gilberta [and most likely saw her eyes] and her jaw dropped. Here it comes… "Whoa! Are your eyes real or are you wearing contacts?" the girl asked eagerly. Hadn't she ever heard of albinos? Gilberta had a feeling that this girl was the type to believe anything you told her.

"Yea they're real – I got them when a radioactive sheep bit me and now I have super powers," Gilberta said casually. The girl's eyes widened.

"Really?" she asked, squealing. Gilberta was almost amazed at how stupid the girl was – she actually believed Gilberta's story?

"Is this chick for real?" Gilberta muttered to Elizabeth who sighed in response.

"Sadly, yes. She is. Al – don't listen to her, she's just kidding. She's an albino and albinos generally have reddish eyes." Gilberta glared at Elizabeth.

"I liked my explanation better," Gilberta muttered to herself. Elizabeth heard and rolled her eyes.

"So… are ya gonna introduce me to your girlfriend or what?" the girl asked finally. Gilberta growled. Why did everyone automatically assume that she and Elizabeth were dating? Gilberta. Liked. Guys. She had had 4 boyfriends in the past year – not girlfriends – boyfriends! It was infuriating and she blamed Eli for all the accusations.

Elizabeth had turned a bright red in response. "What? She's not – I mean – urgh, never mind. Alyssa, this is my friend Gilberta. Gilbert – this is my idiot cousin Alyssa," Elizabeth said, motioning from each girl. Alyssa wrinkled her nose.

"Gilberta?" she asked. Of course of all things to comment on the chick would comment on Gilberta's rather awful name.

"Named after a great-grandfather, pleased to meet ya," Gilberta said coolly, extending her hand out for Alyssa. Alyssa made a move to shake Gilberta's hand when Gilberta's cell phone rang. "Hello?" Gilberta said quickly, secretly pleased she didn't have to shake the hand of Elizabeth's weird cousin.

"Gilbert! Where are you?" Antonio's voice said from the other line.

"Hey Toni… SHIT. I almost forgot – I'll be there in a few!" Gilberta said quickly before Antonio could rant at her. Gilberta turned to Elizabeth, who was giving her a rather curious look. "That was Antonio – I totally forgot I was meeting with them this morning – I'll see you later at English or something!" Gilberta said, already running off before Elizabeth could say anything.

"Don't go and get yourselves expelled on the first day!" Elizabeth called out warningly. Gilberta turned around and smirked at Elizabeth.

"Because you'd miss Francis if ya couldn't see him everyday right?" Gilberta said teasingly before turning back around and running towards the parking lot. As much as she would love seeing Elizabeth's furious look she had to hurry.

Antonio was a peaceful guy and all but the moment you made him waste time in meeting his precious girlfriend he was a monster. A monster Gilberta really did not want to meet.

Feliciano skipped along merrily, humming a little tune under his breath. Behind him trudged Ludwig, who seemed to be in a bad mood. Feliciano had no idea why – it was such a beautiful day outside! Ludwig really needed to lighten up – if he were happier, combined with his strength and intelligence he'd be absolutely perfect! Or at least, that's what Feliciano's grandfather always told him – the perfect man was extremely happy, smart and strong. Nonno always told him that he should grow up to be the perfect man so that woman of all ages would love him the way they loved his Nonno. Feliciano didn't want to let his Nonno down – which is why he started hanging out with Ludwig Beilschmidt. Ludwig was brave and strong and smart and Feliciano wanted to be just like him so he could be brave and strong and smart! It was hard though – Ludwig told Feliciano that if he wanted to be strong and smart he had to do lots of work and training. During the summer the two of them had training sessions with their friend Kiku in which Feliciano would always manage to escape from to eat gelato or paint pictures with his Nonno before getting caught by Ludwig.

When they had first met each other, Ludwig seemed to find Feliciano extremely annoying but as time worn on Ludwig began to be nicer to Feliciano. Feliciano always felt much safer with Ludwig to the point that whenever he had a bad dream he would climb out of his bedroom, walk to Ludwig's house, climb through the window and snuggle up beside Ludwig. Feliciano used to sleep with his sister Lovina but when he was 12 and she was 13 she started being really mean to him and told him to go away. Feliciano's Nonno told him that it was because Lovina was becoming a woman. Feliciano didn't quite understand how Lovina becoming a woman would make her be the meanest person alive once every month but didn't question it. Lovina didn't seem to like him going to Ludwig's house to sleep but as long as he managed to get home into bed before Lovina woke up he usually escaped Lovina's fury.

"Ve~ Ludwig we're almost at school!" Feliciano said excitedly. Ludwig grumbled to himself in response. Feliciano wondered why Ludwig was so grumpy this morning. Perhaps it had something to do with what Gilberta said at breakfast?

Feliciano really didn't understand what Gilberta had meant when she said everybody in the school knew about them. Did the entire school know that they were best friends? That was a good thing, wasn't it? Then why was Ludwig was so mad? Feliciano sighed. Perhaps Germans were always bad tempered.

Whatever it was, Feliciano hoped it would go away soon so Ludwig would be in a better mood.

Alyssa Jones was excited. Ok maybe not excited because only nerds like Lizzie get excited for school – but close to it. This was Alyssa's fresh start. Nobody in this school (or in the country actually) knew who she was… yet. Alyssa's goal was to join as many clubs as possible – get her name known! By the end of the first semester everyone should be bowing down to her, kissing praises at her feet. By the end of the yearshe should be school president because everyone would've voted for her. Alyssa grinned. This was gonna be a great year!

"So you let your Vati arrange a 'play date' with my snobby cousin?"

"There wasn't anything I could do! Father had his 'you-better-listen-or-else' look on. I can't believe I'm going to be spending my Saturday playing Chopin with Miss 'I'm A Better Musician Than You'll Ever Be!" Alyssa looked up at the sound of the voice. She knew that prissy British voice from anywhere.

"LIZZIE!" Alyssa shrieked, running up to her cousin.

"Whaa-oof! Al? Get off of me!" Elizabeth cried out as Alyssa tackled her down. "AL!" Alyssa finally let go and stood up, letting the British girl get back up.

"You still have such a funny accent," Alyssa said through giggles as Elizabeth gave her a dirty look. Alyssa finally noticed the other girl (?) standing beside her cousin. Alyssa's jaw dropped. "Whoa! Are your eyes real or are you wearing contacts?" Alyssa asked eagerly. The girl rolled her red (!) eyes. Alyssa had never quite met a girl like the one that was now exchanging looks with Elizabeth before.

"Yeah they're real – I got them when a radioactive sheep bit me and now I have super power," the girl said casually. Alyssa's own blue eyes widened.

"Really?" she squealed. The other girl looked amused.

"Is this chick for real?" the girl muttered to Elizabeth, who sighed in exasperation.

"Sadly, yes. She is. Al – don't listen to her, she's just kidding. She's an albino and albinos generally have reddish eyes," Elizabeth told Alyssa ask the other girl glared at her.

"I liked my explanation better," the girl muttered to herself. Elizabeth rolled her eyes.

"So… are ya gonna introduce me to your girlfriend or what?" Alyssa said impatiently. The albino girl growled as Elizabeth turned a bright red.

"What? She's not – I mean – urgh, never mind. Alyssa, this is my friend Gilberta. Gilbert – this is my idiot cousin Alyssa," Elizabeth said, motioning from each girl. Alyssa wrinkled her nose.

"Gilberta?" she asked.

"Named after a great-grandfather, pleased to meet ya," Gilberta said. Alyssa didn't think she seemed all too pleased but didn't question it. They were about to shake hands when 'Highway to Hell' began to play out of nowhere. "Hello?" Gilberta said quickly, answering her phone. Alyssa scowled. This had to be the millionth girl who had a cell phone! If moody albino girl could have one why couldn't she? It just wasn't fair! "Hey Toni… SHIT. I almost forgot – I'll be there in a few!" Gilberta turned to Elizabeth, who was watching curiously. "That was Antonio – I totally forgot I was meeting with them this morning – I'll see you later at English!" And with that Gilberta sprinted off in the direction of the parking lot.

"Don't go and get yourselves expelled on the first day!" Elizabeth called out. Gilberta smirked.

"Because you'd miss Francis if ya couldn't see him everyday right?" Gilberta said teasingly. Alyssa frowned. Francis? Who as that? Alyssa put that down on her mental note of things to find out about [before whether or not a tomato was a fruit and after whether or not aliens exist].

Elizabeth sputtered in indignation as Gilberta ran off. "That bitch," Elizabeth muttered under his breath. She glanced at Alyssa. "Well come on – we might as well not go late on our first day," Elizabeth muttered before stalking off. Alyssa could almost do summersaults in excitement.

Her awesome year was almost about to begin!

Antonio Fernandez Carriedo was normally a patient boy. He could wait for months until the first tomato in his tomato garden was ready to be eaten. He waited for almost 10 years before asking out Lovina Vargas, the girl of his dreams. When it came to waiting, Antonio was a pro. Except for today.

"Where is she?" Antonio asked [for the millionth time] as he paced in front of Francis, who was calmly lighting a cigarette.

"Calm down Toni – you called Gilbert a few seconds ago. It's not like she can teleport here or anything," Francis said smoothly as the light breeze made Antonio's white shirt rise, exposing some of his smooth tan skin. Francis exhaled, letting the smoke gush out of his mouth. It was all too tempting for Francis to just put his hands under that white shirt and feel the smooth, hardened, muscular [here, Francis began to salivate] skin… it's not like Antonio would notice or anything. Yes, perhaps he should. Francis grinned wickedly, slinking towards Antonio…

"I'm here – I'm here!" Gilberta exclaimed, running up to the boys. Francis scowled, slinking back to his spot against the hood of his red Mustang.

Antonio sighed in relief, running a hand through his messy brown hair. "Thank God – d'you know how long we were waiting here?"

Gilberta rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah – sorry. I ran into everybody's favourite Brit and got distracted. Hey! No smoking if you're not gonna share," Gilberta added, taking Francis's cigarette and taking a long drag. Francis made a face.

"Why would you want to spend time with such a stuck up little bitch like her?" Francis demanded as Gilberta leaned against the Mustang beside Francis.

"Hey she can be annoying but she comes from a family like mine. We get each other," Gilberta replied, handing the cigarette back to Francis, who had been attempting to put his arm around Gilberta's waist. Gilberta made a motion to burn Francis's arm with said cigarette and Francis retracted his arm quickly, taking the cigarette before Gilberta could threaten to do something worse.

"I honestly don't get you sometimes," Francis muttered before placing his lips on the cigarette. Francis had known Elizabeth for quite a long time and the two had always been arguing with each other. This Gilberta and Antonio knew very well. What Francis had neglected to tell them was that he and Elizabeth had established an almost friendship that only the two of them knew about and that only came out whenever the two were alone together. Neither Gilberta nor Antonio had seen the day when Elizabeth and Francis would be civil to each other and frankly, Francis hoped that day would never come. He rather liked arguing with Elizabeth. It was constant, it was regular, it was expected – it was normal. Whenever things got too bad or too weird for him to handle, he could always count on Elizabeth to be there, arguing with him and making snide comments about him just as always. Francis sighed, rolling his eyes. Figures he would be spending his morning thinking about the British girl.

"You just say that because you wish you could be close to her," Gilberta teased, grinning. Francis glared at her, a brief flashback of a drunken night appearing in his mind.

"Never say that again," he warned, shaking the image [of a naked Elizabeth] away from his mind. Gilberta's left eyebrow [and eyebrow piercing] rose.

"Or what?" she asked, sensing a fight [or challenge].

"Listen guys – as much as I love watching you two tear each other apart, can we get this over with?" Antonio cried out impatiently. Gilberta and Francis exchanged a look.

"Ok then – what's the plan?" Gilberta asked.

"Painting 'BTT WAS HERE' on the wall, oui?" Francis asked.

"I still think we should put 'Bad Touch Trio' instead of 'BTT'," Gilberta muttered as Antonio passed her a can of orange paint.

"I don't care! I want to get this over with!" Antonio exclaimed.

"How much time do we have left anyways?" Francis asked before being interrupted by the ringing of a bell.

"Crap! I promised Lovi that I'd meet her at her homeroom!" Antonio exclaimed, grabbing his backpack and running off, leaving Gilberta and Francis alone.

"And he was the one who wanted to do this the most," remarked Francis drily, dropping his cigarette on the ground and squishing it.

"You still want to do this?" Gilberta asked. Francis shrugged.

"I was hoping to see Angelique…" Francis admitted. Gilberta rolled her eyes.

"Good luck with that," She said as Francis walked away. "I guess it's all up to me then," she said, eyeing the wall critically and lifting up a paintbrush, a wicked smile growing on her face. "This is going to be fun," she said as she made her first mark on the wall.

Elizabeth sighed for the umpteenth time as Alyssa continued to chatter. It had only been a few minutes since Gilberta had run off and already Elizabeth was wishing she had gone with the other girl. Even being near Francis was better than being near the epitome of annoying. And loud. And obnoxious.

"And then I'm going to join the Archery team, the photography club, the gay-straight alliance…" Alyssa rambled on. Elizabeth noticed that the American girl was still wearing her signature mini skit with a crop top and worn brown cowboy boots – even if it was September. In freaking CANADA. Elizabeth wondered if Alyssa truly wasn't cold or if she was too stupid to notice the chilly weather.

"Wait, what? You're joining the gay-straight alliance?" Elizabeth asked, surprised. It was usually the artsy, out-cast type people [like Gilberta] who joined GSA, the rest of the school population preferring to go for more mainstream clubs. Elizabeth hadn't pegged Alyssa as artsy or as an out-cast.

"… the cheerleading squad, the senior band… hmm? Oh yea, of course! I think its cool heteros like me can support homosexuals like you and your girlfriend!" Alyssa said beaming. Elizabeth fumed quietly to herself and wished for a lightning bolt to come out of nowhere and strike Alyssa dead.

"I told you before – I'm straight and Gilbert's just a friend!" Elizabeth exclaimed heatedly. Alyssa burst out laughing.

"Relax Liz – I was only pulling yer leg," Alyssa said winking as she patted Elizabeth's back. Elizabeth felt herself being propelled forwards and gave Alyssa a death glare. "I know you're straight – I know about you and Francis, ya know."

Elizabeth visibly paled, freezing right in front of the school doors. "What? How did you – it didn't mean – it was a one night thing only!" Elizabeth exclaimed.

Alyssa whistled a long note. "So there is something between you and that guy – I only heard your friend mention him but I had no idea something had actually happened!" Pushing Elizabeth into the school and linking her arms with the stunned British girl. "Ok girl – spill. I want to hear all the deets!" Alyssa said eagerly. Elizabeth regained her senses and pushed Alyssa off of her.

"There is nothing! Nothing at all! I just hate the stupid slutty frog and he hates me back! That's it!" Elizabeth said in indignation.

"Sure," Alyssa teased. Elizabeth glared at her cousin and wished some form of a distraction could appear so that she could somehow escape Alyssa.

"I say – isn't your stepbrother supposed to be here today too?" Elizabeth asked, desperate to change the subject. What was his name again? Michael? Harry? Arthur?

"Oh right. MATTHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" Alyssa shrieked [making Elizabeth wince since it had been right in her ear], looking around. "Maaaaatiiiiiiiieeeeeee!" People were beginning to stare. Elizabeth wished she were invisible.

"I-I'm right here, A-Al," a voice said shyly. Elizabeth blinked twice. Out of nowhere appeared a boy with wavy blonde hair (with an odd extra long curl) and violet eyes. Elizabeth was sure the boy hadn't been there a few seconds ago. Perhaps he was some sort of pixie or sprite? Elizabeth would have to check her encyclopaedia of magical creatures when she got home.

Alyssa beamed at the boy. "Matthew – this is our boring cousin Elizabeth. Elizabeth, this is my stepbrother Matthew." Boring? Elizabeth glared at Alyssa before shaking Matthew's hand. It was rather shocking how the two step-siblings looked alike, as though they were actually related by blood.

"You two look a lot like you're actually related," Elizabeth remarked.

Matthew flushed as Alyssa beamed. "He looks just like me, doesn't he?" she asked eagerly.

Even with Elizabeth's limited knowledge of boys, she knew Matthew did not appreciate being compared to a girl, but Matthew did not say anything. Elizabeth felt a flash of pity towards her new cousin.

The bell suddenly rang. Elizabeth jumped in shock; she hadn't realized she had been standing underneath the bell. As Alyssa giggled at Elizabeth's reaction she blushed a deep red. "I have to get to class now. If you want to register in the office the office is down the hallway to your right," Elizabeth didn't bother to wait for a goodbye and walked off in search of her math class. Elizabeth wasn't looking forward to math. She was terrible at the damned subject – English was her forte. It didn't help that she had the hardest marking grade 12 math teacher in the entire school. Elizabeth groaned. Her life really sucked right about now.

… and it was about to get worse.

Lovina glared at the locker across from her as though it were offending her in some way. If her little [annoying] brother were there he would've said the colour blue that the locker was the exact same colour blue that Ludwig's eyes were. Lovina growled. Stupid potato bastard.

When Lovina woke up this morning she had gone to wake up her brother for his first day of school so that he wouldn't sleep in the entire day and miss it [like last year]. When he had reached his room, to her fury he was not there. There was no doubt of where Feliciano might've been in Lovina's mind. He definitely at the potato bastard's house. He wasn't doing much to diffuse these rumours.

It's not like Lovina was against gay people or anything. Sure she had been raised by her very religious parents to believe they were bad and all but her grandfather [who she and her brother were now living with] taught them to love everyone for who they are. So if her brother was gay, she didn't mind, not at all. She just didn't want him to be gay for the potato bastard.

Lovina had hated Ludwig Beilschmidt ever since their first meeting – when she was 12 and he was 11. The way Feliciano clung to his side and sung praises about the German boy made Lovina's skin crawl. Feliciano never said nice things about her. Then again, except the tomato freak [her boyfriend Antonio] and her grandfather whenever he managed to actually pay attention to her and not 'adorable, sweet Feli!' nobody else said nice things about her. Not that Lovina cared.

Anyways, back to the potato bastard. Ever since their first meeting, Ludwig had managed to piss her off in some sort of way. And whenever she tried to get revenge she ended up embarrassing herself in some sort of way! Lovina hated the potato bastard vehemently.

"Lovi~ my darling tomato~~" a voice cooed from nearby. Lovina resisted the urge to slam her face into a locker. Just as she was worrying about Idiot # 1… there came Idiot # 2!

"How many times have I told you not to call me that!" Lovina hissed as Antonio Carriedo [aka one of the hottest boys in the school] pulled her into his arms. Despite herself, Lovina found herself swooning. Antonio always managed to smell so nice... Lovina wished she could stay in Antonio's arms forever…

Wait, what? Lovina pushed Antonio off of her. The last thing she needed was for people to think she was a big softie.

"Lovi you look so cute when you blush!" Antonio exclaimed, attempting to hug Lovina again. Lovina scowled.

"Just get away from me you idiot!" Lovina exclaimed as the bell rang. "I need to get to class now."

"But Lovi~"

"But nothing. I'm going to be late to class. You should go too. My boyfriend isn't gonna be a skipper," Lovina said, scowl returning. If her parents found that not only was she dating a boy a year older than her but a troublemaker… well, it'd be goodbye Antonio, hello life as a nun.

Lovina reluctantly turned away from Antonio and walked into her first period class.

She could always hang out with him later right?

Matthew's life sucked. Harder than his step-sister with her ex-boyfriend, harder than a leech, it sucked. Why? Well, first his papa goes and falls in love with an obnoxious American woman during his business trip to America and decides that hey, a guy can only live once so let's go and get married in Vegas and then tell my son about it the next morning! Matthew didn't even get to have a say it – it just happened.

And then there was Alyssa. Alyssa seemed like one of those girls who made fun of him back in Montreal – bitchy, slutty… you know the type. Surprisingly though, the moment she had found out she had a new older step-brother she was ecstatic. Her enthusiasm in having a step-brother equalled out the lack of enthusiasm Matthew had.

He would've been fine living in Montreal with a new mother and a new sister. But then his father had to go and suggest moving to Toronto because his stepmother's business had a branch there and… here he was now. Trudging down the sidewalk, miles behind his stepsister. Alyssa hadn't stopped talking about how she was going to become the most popular kid in school. Unlike most girls, knowing Al, she'd probably end up doing it too. Matthew rolled his eyes. He wasn't looking forward to being invisible in another school… or speaking English. It's not like Matthew couldn't speak English – he could, fluently – he just didn't want to. He preferred speaking French and now… now he had to speak English 24/7. Le sigh.

Matthew managed to look up in time to see his stepsister tackle down some random girl. It was probably their cousin, Elizabeth. Funny… Matthew had expected her to look more, uptight? All the pictures Alyssa had of Elizabeth showed her with two long pigtails and a schoolgirl style uniform that one would only see in TV shows like Madeline or something. This girl had wilder hair [not in ponytails] and punk clothes, like the girl standing beside her. Matthew rolled his eyes. Obviously his new cousin was a bit of a rebel.

Matthew watched as the other girl ran off from Alyssa and Elizabeth and left the two of them alone. Alyssa must've forgotten she had been walking to school with him. He decided to just continue trailing behind his stepsister and his cousin as they started walking into the school.

He could hear bits and pieces of their conversation but really did not care. Once or twice Matthew heard the name Francis and thought it was funny because his father knew a man who had a son named Francis that was the same age as he was. The two hadn't seen each other for years but Matthew still had scarring memories of the last time they met.

From the looks of Elizabeth, the British girl was ready to throttle Alyssa about whatever she was saying. Matthew smirked. Alyssa had a tendency to do that a lot. It was funnier because it was always purely unintentional.

"Oh right. MATTHEWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" Alyssa shrieked suddenly, making Matthew jump. Why the hell was she calling his name out? Alyssa literally turned around and stared past Matthew before looking around frantically. Could Alyssa not see him? Matthew fumed silently to himself. "Maaaaatiiiiiiiieeeeeee!" Matthew sighed. To any other person this would've been insanely mortifying but hey – it's not like anybody could see him or anything. Ah well, might as well let Alyssa know he was there before she lost her voice or something. He didn't want to piss off Al – she was abnormally strong for a girl.

Matthew walked up to Alyssa and Elizabeth. Neither girl saw him yet. "I-I'm right here, A-Al," Matthew said, cursing himself for his stuttering. He was never very good at talking to people he didn't know. His father had said it was because he hadn't properly matured yet. His mother had said it was because he was just like her and preferred not to talk. Matthew's heart squeezed. His mother…

Alyssa beamed at him. "Matthew – this is our boring cousin Elizabeth. Elizabeth, this is my stepbrother Matthew." Again with the unintentional insulting – or was it intentional this time? With Alyssa, Matthew couldn't really be too sure. Elizabeth glared at Al before shaking Matthew's hand. Elizabeth's hand was cold and clammy… like a corpse… like his mother's… Matthew mentally shook himself. There was no point to thinking about his mother on the first day of school. He was going to end up sobbing in the washrooms, being discovered by the toughest boy in school and then spending his last year of high school as the cry-baby.

"You two look a lot like you're actually related," Elizabeth remarked. Matthew flushed; ever since he met Alyssa, people had been saying that to them more than ever – whenever they managed to notice him.

Alyssa beamed. "He looks just like me, doesn't he?" she asked eagerly. Matthew scowled. Matthew Williams was many things and feminine-looking was not part of that list. Matthew never considered himself to look like a girl. Besides, Matthew was older by a year and three days. Didn't that mean Alyssa looked like him? Elizabeth seemed to understand this however – she gave him a sympathetic look, though maybe Matthew was just imagining it. Elizabeth's unfortunate eyebrows made it hard to decipher emotions at times.

The bell suddenly rang, startling the heck out of Matthew. Matthew let a breath, clutching his chest. The bell in this school was insanely loud. It seemed to rivet one's brain. At least he hadn't been the only one startled by the bell – Elizabeth had jumped. Matthew hid a grin as Alyssa giggled at Elizabeth.

"I have to get to class now. If you want to register in the office the office is down the hallway to your right," Elizabeth said, walking off already.

"Guess it's just you and me now isn't it Mattie?" Alyssa said, beaming at her brother. Matthew wished Alyssa wouldn't call him that. It didn't help the 'looks like a girl' thing.

"I guess," Matthew muttered, walking alongside Alyssa.

"You know, I have feeling about this year. I think big things are gonna happen – to the both of us!" Alyssa said, nudging Matthew as they walked towards the office. Matthew grunted in response. As if. This was going to be just another typical year for Matthew, just like all the others.

"Hello, how may I help you?" a voice said cheerfully at the secretary's desk. Alyssa sauntered up to the old woman at the desk and beamed at her.

"Hi! I'm new here – my dorky cousin says I have to register before going to class," Alyssa informed her. The woman smiled.

"What is your name?" she asked, turning to her computer.

"Alyssa E Jones," Alyssa said proudly. The woman typed the name in and frowned.

"It says here that you are an Alyssa F Jones," the secretary stated. Alyssa rolled her eyes.

"It's actually an E for Emily – they made a typo at my old school," Alyssa replied. The secretary nodded seriously.

"We'll have to change that," she murmured, typing a few things into the computer. "Alright then, Alyssa E Jones, your first class is English in room 132 which is down the hall around the corner, first door to your left. Here's a map and your schedule for the day," the secretary said, handing Alyssa two pieces of paper. "Have a good first day!"

"Thanks!" Alyssa replied, beaming. She walked out of the room confidently. Matthew wondered wryly why the secretary didn't notify his stepsister of her obvious dress code violations. He then walked up to the secretary's desk and cleared his throat.

"Hmm?" the secretary looked up. "Are you having trouble finding room 132 sweetie?" she asked.

"Um… I-I'm not Alyssa. I'm her s-stepbrother… Matthew W-Williams," Matthew said, turning pink. The secretary blushed as well. Great, first day of school and he's already been mistaken for a chick. Perhaps it was time to invest in a haircut.

"Whoops! The two of you look so darn similar! Let me see… you have…French first period," the secretary said, handing him his schedule and map. "That's in room 208."

"Thank you," Matthew said, turning and walking out of the office, thanking his lucky stars that his best subject was first. Maybe finally something good could come from moving away from his beloved Montreal.

A/N: Also known as "I Fucking Left My Heart With A Canadian And He Throws It Away For A Freaking Big Breasted Chick!" the title is the short form ;D

Goddamn, I was supposed to write this story last year. This is what happens when you procrastinate, guys.

And don't worry, I promise the chapters won't be this long. This is just the introduction to the main characters and I couldn't figure out where to cut it off.

The main pairings will be PruCan, FrUK, Spamano, GerIta, AmeRus and AusHun but there will be more. Just ask if you want to know the other pairings, or have any questions about the story [like the names I chose and such]

Review?