Inspired by the Gred and Forge song and the Tim Allen "Santa Clause" movie.

I don't own Harry Potter or any of it's characters!

"We didn't mean to do it, there was actually nothing to it. We didn't mean to kill Santa Claus." -Gred and Forge, "(We Didn't Mean to Kill) Santa Claus"

Chapter One:

All was peaceful, all was blessedly quiet that Christmas Eve night, despite the fact that the Wizarding World was at war.

Everyone slept soundly, tucked in their own beds, hoping that Santa would come even though Voldemort was at large.

And Santa did come. Except, he ran into a slight problem.

Make that two slight problems.

Two nearly identical, red-headed problems.

Fred's eyes snapped open around midnight. He sat bolt upright in bed, listening intently to the sounds coming above his head. He crawled out from under the quilts and tiptoed across the floor to his brother's bed.

"George!" Fred said in an urgent whisper as he shook his twin. "George, wake up!"

"Wha, wha do'ya wan'?" George asked sleepily as he sat up.

"You hear that?" Fred asked.

"Very funny," George said, narrowing his eyes as he pointed to where an ear used to be.

"I'm not kidding," Fred said. "There's something on the roof."

"You sure you're not just hearing the ghoul in the attic?" George asked, skeptical.

"Our ghoul never sounds like footsteps," Fred said. George's eyes widened.

"Death Eaters?" He asked.

"I don't know," Fred said. "Let's go check it out."

The twins quickly grabbed their bathrobes, pulled on their sneakers and grabbed their wands. They tiptoed quietly through the house, careful not to wake their parents or sister. They went out the front door and hid behind the shed, staring up at the roof.

"You see it?" George said, his eyes widening as he saw the stout figure.

"Really, they sent Goyle?" Fred said with a frown. "Guess they thought this would be too easy."

"They thought wrong!" George said with a mischievous smirk. "Stunners on three?"

"One…" Fred said, raising his wand as he smirked as well.

"Two…" George said as focused his wand on his target.

"THREE! STUPEFY!" They yelled together, sending jets of red light towards the person on the roof. Instantly, the figure disappeared from the roof and they heard a 'crunch' as the body hit the snow.

Pleased with themselves, the twins ran around the back of the house to where the Death Eater had fallen.

Except, it wasn't a Death Eater.

Fred and George both paled as they looked at the unconscious man in the red suit with the long white beard, laying spread eagle in the thick snow.

Simultaneously, the twins said,

"Oh, *CENSOR*."

They had just Stupefied Santa Claus.