Well, um...I apologize for the long wait. :(

Okay. So, Jo and Scott. I'm not sure about this chapter...

Hey, did anyone notice that the order of the females choosing their dates is the same as the order of their elimination?

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN TOTAL DRAMA.

Chris stood in front of the camera, wearing a black ski mask, like a bank robber. "Hello, there, viewers. Uh, this is Chris McLean, in case anyone can't tell. So, last time on Total Drama...spray tan caused the annihilation of my movie star-quality hair. Now it's all...stringy and orange. And some interns thought that it would be a good idea to use PERMANENT marker on my face!"

A mob of interns suddenly made an appearance, screaming as a bunch of rabid wolves, Sasquatchanakwa, the bear, and some sort of a mutated banana with legs (it's a long story, but it involved an unfortunate turn of events for the life of a regular banana) chased them.

"On top of everything else, I got arrested for sneaking two imbeciles to a restaurant. I'm currently on parole...but, hey! At least I didn't get sued!" he chuckled maniacally, then continued. "Now, let's hear it for our lovely lady, Jo!"

An athletic girl with dirty-blond hair stomped over to stand next to the host. "Can it, McLean."

"Nice to see that you're in the mood," Chris replied. (We assume that he quirked his eyebrows, but only his eyes and mouth were visible). He handed her the fishbowl. "Here are the candidates for your heart."

Jo grunted, stuck her arm in, and snatched a strip of paper. "I got..." Her face contorted in disgust. "Scott?!"

"Oh, brother." The said redneck groaned, and reluctantly stood up. "Do I have to go out with him?" he sneered.

"Lightning was sha-right!" Lightning shouted. "Jo is a dude!"

Jo rolled her eyes at Lightning and glowered at Scott. "Watch it, farm boy, or I can assure you that you'll encounter something worse than mutated sharks!"

"Like your face?" Scott quipped, earning a few chuckles from some of Jo's enemies, including Heather.

"That's it!" Jo lunged for the ginger-haired boy, only to be restrained by Chef.

"Take it easy," Chris chuckled. "Save the violence for the date!"

"I hate you," Jo griped. "And I hate this -censored- outfit!"

The unlikely duo had their date in some fast-food restaurant (once again, because of lacking funds). People were giving them curious stares, because both of them were dressed like they were going to a Red Carpet event.

As a part of their challenge, they had to wear certain clothes. Jo wore a long red dress with horribly sparkly jewelry and her face was made up like a drag queen's (not so different from the time she tried to seduce Sasquatchanakwa). Scott didn't look much better. His hair had been slicked back with way too much gel, and he was forced to wear an itchy tuxedo that didn't fit right.

They obviously didn't want to wear those, but they conceded for the sake of the money (although the conceding was anything but peaceful).

Scott rolled his eyes. "Yeah, because I definitely want to see you dressed like that." He wiped his mustard-covered mouth on his jacket sleeve, not even caring that the dry-cleaning probably cost a fortune. "Well, I do love horror movies."

"Hey!" Jo snapped. She snatched her burger from the table and took a big bite, deliberately messing up her lipstick.

They sat in sullen silence for a few minutes.

"So, how's life?" Scott lamely asked, since he was bored out of his skull. "Like, college and all?"

The jockette glanced at him skeptically as she gulped down her soda. "S'okay," she muttered.

Scott scoffed. "Whatever," he replied in his usual whiny voice.

Jo raised an eyebrow. "And how are you doing?" she countered, before hastily adding, "Not that I care, of course."

The redhead shrugged. "Farm, farm, and more farm. The dirt practically comes out of my ears." He chuckled. "You should've seen Pappy's face when the stupid Total Drama helicopter kidnapped me to go here."

"You went via helicopter?" Jo scowled. "No fair. Some idiot just smuggled me in a sack!"

Scott rolled his eyes. "Yeah, being locked in the lavatory while being bound and gagged sure was fun."

They sat in silence again.

Scott attempted (again) to start a conversation. "Are you and Brick together?"

Jo spat her drink out. "What? Sir Leaks-a-Lot? No way! What the hell?"

Stirring his soda, Scott sighed. "My pappy had someone install wi-fi in our house. Now he just sits there, reading some creepy-ass fanfiction instead of hunting, like he used to."

Jo frowned. "There are fanfictions about real people?"

"I know, right!" Scott threw his hands up. "You would not believe the 'Dott' thing going on! I haven't even talked to Dawn that much, except, you know, to accuse her and crap. And Scotterra, Scourtney, and Scott/Duncan, or whatever. And we're in the 'Cartoon' section, as if we're—"

"Wow," Chris chuckled, interrupting Scott's rant. "I didn't know that you were both this socially awkward at dates!"

"Shut up!" both of them yelled in unison.

"Can we just cut this date—" Scott abruptly stopped talking, and he raised a trembling finger to point out of the window. "F-F-F-F—"

A mutant shark grinned at them maliciously from the glass doors, causing some of the diners to gasp and evacuate the place.

"Yeah, last episode was totally boring," Chris said, checking out his fingernails lazily. "So, for old time's sake, I decided to bring in something that resembled the older challenges! You know, something of the running and screaming type?"

Needless to say, it took the entire kitchen staff to try to persuade Scott from the top of the refrigerator.

He was curled in fetal position, rocking back in forth.

"Oh, yeah," Chris called out. "Did I mention that failure to participate in challenges will lead to immediate disqualification? Meaning, no money?"

"What!" Jo exploded. "I didn't wear all this stuff just so we could lose! Scott, get your ass down here!"

"B-but…Fang…"

Suddenly, the door of the refrigerator snapped open, and, inexplicably, Fang himself emerged, wearing a sharky smirk.

"GAHH!" Scott screamed, and he jumped off, landing into Jo's arms.

"How is that even possible?" one of the kitchen staff people yelled.

The shark approached them, and the theme from Jaws began playing threateningly.

"Oh, for heaven's sake," Jo sighed. Throwing Scott down, she threw a punch at the shark's face, making him faint. The blond jockette kicked him back to the fridge for good measure.

"Y-you saved me," Scott stammered. Then his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he fainted.

"This is seriously lame," Jo snapped.

The kitchen staff nervously glanced at the fridge. "I think we should open a sushi bar!"

Chris prodded Scott's body with his foot and sighed. "Well, dude's out cold!" he announced. "Looks like this date is over, then."

"Finally," Jo sighed, yanking out the sparkly things from her ears. Kicking Scott's body, she stomped off.

"So...we're almost done with our ROTI female contestants. And ow, this ski mask itches," Chris winced.

An intern passed by, innocently whistling and holding some weird powder. Chris eyed him suspiciously, shrugged, and continued talking. "Next up is our Indie Chick...Zoey!"

Zoey walked in, twirling her red hair nervously. "Hi! Uh, I already have a boyfriend, so..." She sighed and took a strip of paper from the fishbowl. "Um," Zoey said. "I got..."

Suddenly, Fang threw open the fridge door. Scott regained consciousness, screamed, and ran out of the restaurant. Fang chased him, knocked down the camera, and the entire screen was reduced to static.

No, this isn't a Scott-bashing chapter. I happen to like Scott. But I find his shark-fearing moments in All-Stars really hilarious, hence Fang's appearance. I threw in the fanfiction reference for...well, I just thought that the chapter was too short. And, I didn't mean to offend anyone with the mentioned ships. I ship Brick/ Jo sometimes (rarely, though). Sorry for the mild OOCness. Please review!