Title: The Worst Laid Plans

Author: Omnicat

Unofficially Adapted From: Alan Taylor & co's Thor: The Dark World.

Spoilers & Desirable Foreknowledge: All of the above.

Warnings: None.

Characters & Pairings: Loki & Jane, with a tiny FitzSimmons cameo

Summary: Fix-it fic. Some pretty awful things happened in Thor: The Dark World, and much as we all undoubtedly love our angst, no fannish experience is complete without the occasional bout of staunch denial. So here we go. :)

Author's Note: Last one, just for fun. You ain't seen me self-indulgent yet. XD Enjoy!

II-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-I-oOo-I-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-II

The Worst Laid Plans; Vitally Important Jane Bonus

Mjolnir whooshed through the air up and down the indoor ski slope, followed by a window-rattling roar and the incongruously puppy-like alien behemoth it belonged to. Like the showman he was, Thor expertly manoeuvred his hammer for the entertainment of the creature and the small crowd of spectators gathered at the top of the slope. Thor, a delighted Frigga with her arm around his waist, and Odin, leaning on his shoulder from the force of his laughter, were surrounded by a gaggle of SHIELD agents ranging from visibly trigger-happy to childishly exited, which left Jane and Loki standing together off to the side much like they had during their first meeting.

Jane gestured towards the ice beast. "You wouldn't happen to know what those animals are called, would you?"

"No. But I have found that no matter where you go and what they look like, one out of five domesticated creatures will answer to 'Fluffy'."

"Huh. I nicknamed it Lokibeast."

Loki cocked his head. "I'm not sure whether to be flattered or insulted."

"Since it came from Jotunheim and has the horns and wrecked everything in its path before we figured out how to make it happy, and stuff."

"Leaning towards flattered, but not quite convinced yet. It's rather repulsive-looking, don't you think?"

Jane couldn't help but study him from the corner of her eye. Don't you worry about that. Disney prince. She'd fucking called it.

"We hope we can train it to not go back to wrecking everything even if it's not perfectly happy for a while," she said instead.

Loki turned away from the frolicking monster to send her a knowing smirk.

She raised an eyebrow in challenge. "Think you can manage that?"

"I managed for a thousand years, Jane Foster. I don't imagine it'll be much harder now."

"Once you went off the rails you did so pretty spectacularly, though."

"I was trying to find out when the satisfaction of it would kick in. I learned from the experience and feel no need to repeat it."

As far as explanations for cackling, cape-wearing supervillainy by a magic-using immortal alien shapeshifter from myth went, it sounded reasonable enough. Jane had given up on things that made sense in the general sense of the word ages ago. "I'll hold you to that."

"You don't believe me," Loki gasped, pressing his hand to his chest in mock outrage.

"Just don't forget that I turned an Aethered-up dark elf into confetti using science and we'll be fine."

He returned her slight smile by grinning like the cat who got the cream, and nudged her. "Let's be friends."

Jane was so shocked she almost keeled over.

Loki took hold of her shoulders and gently pulled her into a more vertical position. "I mean it, let's be friends. I like your bravery and your intellect. As well as whatever possessed you to punch me in the face the moment you first saw me."

He sounded like he meant it, too. Weird guy.

"And your visage isn't too hard on the eyes, either."

"Woah woah, down, boy. If this is going to turn into you trying to seduce me to get back at Thor one last time, stop right there," Jane said, her hands raised deflectively, though she could barely hold back her laughter. "I just made out with your brother like an hour ago. I've got his cooties all over me. Think about that. Is bloodless revenge really worth it? Is it?"

"Oh, lady Jane," Loki said with an effortlessly charming smile, and demonstratively clasped his hands behind his back. "If I were to seduce you, Thor would be the last reason for it, and his 'cooties' might just be worth it. But let's just start with being friends. Has anyone composed a saga in your honour yet?"

That threw Jane for a loop all over again, though not unpleasantly. "Uh... I might be getting a medal? There isn't really a procedure for this kinda thing. The UN and SHIELD are still corroborating our data at the moment. The Convergence blew the world's collective minds pretty badly."

"Oh, that just won't do. Your deeds should be sung for eternity!" Loki said. "And I'm not just saying that because those songs would tell of my own journey as well."

Loki hooked his arm in hers and steered her away from the suddenly noisy SHIELD agents. Lokibeast had stopped chasing Mjolnir in favour of a long, messy drought from its kiddie pool of antifreeze and then dropped onto its side with the air of a contentedly purring cat, and one young scientist had crept down the slope to pet it like one. Thor had another young scientist caught around the waist and was trying to tell him something about not startling the beast by storming up to it shouting at the top of one's lungs, but it was hard to follow over the boy's cries of "JEMMA! JEMMA FOR GOD'S SAKE, REMEMBER WHAT HAPPENED THE LAST TIME YOU TOUCHED UNTESTED ALIEN STUFF!"

"Your magic, primitive as it was, was key to saving the universe. Sometimes the most unassuming solution can be the most effective. I like that."

Jane hoped her face wasn't as red as it felt. "I guess I'll take that as a compliment?" she all but giggled.

"Oh, you should. I admit I'm a bit rusty when it comes to honest, unambiguous compliments, but I'm fairly sure I'm buttering you up like freshly toasted bread here."

"Well, feel free to keep it up."

"Butter butter. Butter butter."

Jane grinned. "I changed my mind, you can stop."

"Butter butter butter."

"Stop."