nooooooooooooooooooooo!

Koneko and Ophis are characters created for pedophiles. I only see harem, Koneko and Ophis together and story end for my. Author is pedophile, only pedophiles like Koneko and Ophis. And harem wants men who don't have girlfriend or are impotents.

Sigh... does it need to be a harem? And what about six paths sage mode? Does naruto still have that? And his gudoudama? They are the best weapons for dxd universe!

ok, your pre-chapter AN says the chapter wouldn't be one long, drawn-out battle. Then you gave us... a long, drawn-out battle over the entire chapter! And worse, a battle that accomplished fuck all, because three bad guy leaders came, three escaped, nothing was really accomplished. Utterly pointless chapter-long battles really piss me off generally when reading fics.

Seriously, naruto and akemi were just wandering around playing like fucking idiots the whole fucking battle. Naruto took the fight against Riser more seriously than he did this fucking battle and he left all the hard work up to EVERYONE else. How does that prove anything except he's all talk?

It's kinda sad, you had a good story but ruined it with bad writing, literally everyone in this story is so ooc that it's not even funny. You want to give Naruto a different backstory, that's good because canon Naruto is not all that interesting, but this isn't even the same person anymore, they just share a name. Koneko is supposed to hate/be scared of senjutsu, Ophis should feel no emotions as she is literally a primordial being born from nothingness, Rias is smarter than what you have here and cares for her peerage as they are her family and Naruto is definitely not some wannabe edgelord in training.

if you remove anybody you will get hurt bad really bad

Sooo wait... can naruto use the six paths sage mode? Or six paths senjutsu? Does he even have his truth balls anymore?!

c'mon man don't you think Naruto and issei would get along well?, i mean he acts kinda like Jiraiya so its not impossible for them to get along, also i vote akeno, and asia into issei's harem

here is info about shinju narutoverse wiki/God_Tree and if you can do something about the marriage status of grayfia because personali i dont like wife stealing.

People don't just come back to life unless Foul Play or something is involved... Devils? Devils with Evil Pieces? They revive people without foul play all the time so they just assume because its not them its foul? Where is Grayfia at

Blood of your enemies coat your hands? Rush of Adrenaline as you fight to stay alive? Losing someone close to you? Been stabbed through the chest by your brother cause you 'got in the way'? Oh how Edgy Naruto! Total badass saying that shit to a high school student, your just the coolest lol.

Seriously, how fucking bad. Did you honestly think that was a cool moment to write down?

He did spill his guts though? Doesn't matter if he left out little details like Haku and Zabuza he still told her majority of his fucking life story, events at his birth all the way to the war and that he was a Child of Prophecy... Yeah, defo spilled his guts.

You take to many Fanfiction Cliches and try to hard to make your Naruto look cool and powerful. Naruto all the way up to the war doesn't give a fuck about the Ninja Rule Book, there is no such thing as old enough to kill, old enough to fuck shite.

It's a lazy and honestly appaling effort to justify writing underage sex scenes... I get it, it happens in real life, teens get curious and some DO have sex by the time they are 12. But more often than not it's Authors just wanting to see Naruto boning chicks regardless of the age instead of writing about a meaningfull relationship, which sucks.

It's strange because from what I remember your Naruto x RWBY Crossover is really well thought out and written, as far as I remember. This is garbage though, really only clicked because Grayfia is Bae... Doubt those interactions are gonna be crap as well. Retcon is probs gonna make it so she hasn't ever dated or slept with anyone in her many years of life lmao. I'd love to see someone actually write a break up between Sirzechs and Grayfia.

More mature and realistic but oh so willing to let an innocent die? I don't really like Issei but that is bullshit. Naruto, ANY somewhat in character Naruto with his ideals would have saved him. The excuse of not exposing himself doesn't work like some try to spin it doesn't work here either. Revealed himself to Ophis and Great Red then explained his life story to Rias... Just no. He's not mature and realistic or jaded. He is nothing but a straight up fucking idiot. Even more so than his usual self.

Taijutsu does not utilise Ninjutsu. They are completely seperate things unless it is Nin-Taijutsu like what the Raikage uses. Firing Fire Balls and Water Dragons is not hand to hand combat...

Follow his mothers own style and make a kenjutsu form unique to him. Way of the Trickster was born... So did he learn Kushina's style or not? Or did he just create his own, dunno what your tryna say here.

Don't know how learning about your family 'unlocks" his heritage, much less why it turns his hair crimson.

Ah the typical Konoha being attacked but Minato and Kushina somehow seal or teach Naruto techniques through stupid means amongst it all. Weird how no one ever noticed the seal on his shoulder either.

Was there a need to go over the general events of what happened to get Naruto to where he is now? Most people are probably here to see Naruto in DxD, not a recap of your Naruto Timeline. Gaara smiling at Naruto, the Kage bickering, Tobi's monolouge and how the battle ended. Was all really unneccesary. All we really had to know was that yeah there was a war and that Naruto decided to leave. Majority of it was unneccesary imo.

Can I bring flames to make smores?...