Wait...
How is Ed Winry's uncle?

Whuh? WhatisthisIdon'teven-

Funny, though. :P

AH! That made me laugh right out loud with great jolly joy! I love when you include Hohenheim; you portray him excellently. And in this particular way, as the root of potential interbreeding... What fun! :D

I like how everything kind of came full-circle. It started with Den, ended with Den. Nice touch.

I also kind of giggled at the whole "You don't think you're the only one, right?" xDD Oh, Pinako. I do love her. But secretly, I'm kinda glad I'm not the only one who's had that "Did something happen between them? wtf?" thought...if only for a moment before pushing it away, because I love EdxWin too much to linger on that. :]

So cute. I loved it. The detail about the dog is good, and your dialogue is spot-on. Everything about Hohenheim just makes me happy. Except the deserting father part. But after that.

The only comment I have is that a couple of times, rather than using a character's name, you say "Pinako's granddaughter" or "Hohenheim's son." Those were the only two instances that caught my attention, but typically I think it's better to just use the character's name. When you said, "…raced past Edward and Pinako's granddaughter," I read that as, like, "the granddaughter of Edward and Pinako," and somehow that became Edward and Winry's daughter, and then somehow a "she" was shouting and Winry turned up out of nowhere and I was really confused and had to go back and read it like four more times before I got it.

That's mostly me being an idiot, but still, there's no reason not to just say, "Edward and Winry." We know she's Pinako's granddaughter—there's no reason to be cryptic about it.

This turned into a much longer comment than I intended. Oh well! Again, I thought it was so cute—especially Al at the end, that was my favorite. I'll be looking for more FMA by you. :)

Oh, Pinako, you sly wench! xD She does seem the sort to have done that in her youth, though.

When Hohenheim said 'About how Ed is Winry's uncle', I gasped incredibly loudly. To be perfectly honest, I've never seen Pinako and Hohenheim's relationship in that way at all. ;; But the way Hohenheim reacted when Pinako said 'surely you don't think you were the only one?' made me laugh.

I'm glad Pinako stuck up for Ed and Winry. :)

Thank you for writing this! :D

~ Dream

Ha ha! This is so funny, in a twisted way...