I know this is old now, but...why does the story even need a pairing?

I get it, having a relationship building as well is kinda nice, but...for some stories, you don't want any of that, you just want the main character to have friends, allies and whatnot, since a lot of the time love interests are just so blatantly forced and boring.

That's one of the main reasons my main story character hasn't and probably won't get a single pairing, because it just doesn't fit.

But hey, up to you I guess.

I can get the symbolic giving up weapons, he can summon main ones back instantly. Shouldn't have given that info away, too, would only make guards more nervous. But allowing to be bound in some kind of magic-sealing handcuffs, that apparently makes him feel like he had his soul ripped out? Yeah, screw that "my lady's safety outweights" crap. Over and over I keep seeing protagonists doing everything to accommodate someone and bending over backwards. Almost never do I see the other party even attempting to not be giant twats and making some steps towards protagonist. You're giving them priceless intel, and you have to act like a prisoner to boot? It's supposed to be a meeting between equals, not a superior and subordinate. That's just bullshit. What next, maybe chop off your limbs so you can't cast or move threateningly? Blindfold and gag? Impale himself, just for a good measure? It's not like he can die anyway.

I know I'm blowing this out of proportion, but I just have the biggest boner for freedoms and liberties, and it infuriates me greatly when I see people give them away, even if temporarily.

Though it was quite good at the beginning. I feel like death kinda ruins the story. Having some op force or person like Death is just boring.

Found this hidden gem and would love to see it continued when you come back _

Awe I wanted the thunderbird to be Harry's animagus, but I'm too late for this

Idiot

Holy shite, people are rude. There are some rough edges here, but it's an interesting enough story that it more than compensates for them in my mind. I sincerely hope that these asshats didn't stop you writing, and I'd really love to see where this was going to go, if you had a working outline at this point.

Where is Dobby we have not seen him for most of the story.

"Then the question becomes 'who is going to protect the ship while the others work on taking Karazhan?'," Harry concluded. "We're also more than a week behind schedule. We need to hurry, but we can't afford to rush." He turned to Sylvanas and said, "I finished designing the ritual yesterday. Now we just need a place to perform it."

What schedule? Why do they have a schedule? Who made the schedule? Why are they on time constraints? You can't just make people say shit because you saw it in movies.

So exactly how had things gone wrong? Harry could just summon his wand and get out, apparently. Also, he has no immunity to poisons?

Are you even trying with the consistency of the story? And what is up with the amount of shitty angst backstories?

Ok, first of all, can you stop obsessing over rapists? I cringe every time at your childish attempt at using a serious problem for cheap tension.

Gnolls are like Hyenas. And just as you hold no sexual attraction for Hyenas, the vice versa is also true.

Furthermore, a short look into the wiki shows that Gnolls are much more likely to treat you as literal meat, than a sexual piece of meat.

Second of all, why is Jasmine being hated by Si 7? Why would she be "retired" if she returns, other than your need to create "tension" by making up bullshit personal issues so Harry can be super kewl and solve them.

She is one of the best agents, and one of the most trusted ones, considering she is supposed to be spying on such a mysterious organization. Also, why the fuck is she so surprised and anti-crime? She is part of a spy organization that assassinates people. She made it clear that SI7 agents being killed by their own for literally no reason is an expected behavior. But she acts shocked that Harry wants to recruit someone who might be a criminal?

Why are everyone surprised at expansion charms? They got magical pouches that can hold 30 full armor sets.

Also, consistency issues. You noted that 10 gold is enough for a family to live for a week, but then said that Jasmine was only paid 2 gold per week.

Also, Jasmine was drugged for 3 hours, but there was only a 0.5 hour timeskip after the talk. So did the talk take 2.5 hours?

Congrats. Your story actually have male members, which is a significant improvement over many others. Just don't sideline them.

So, we have

1) Harry throwing an anger tantrum at Death, when she seems to be worried about him. He needs to get his anger under control. Also, apparently Death is now under him for no discernible reason. Apparently, you decided to dig yourself into a deeper hole.

Also, apparently, Death is a child who can't handle emotions, despite infinite years old. Also, why is she suddenly feeling emotions? Does her magic have a random clause, which for unknown reasons, forces her to do so? Why would it?

2) Sylvanas acting like a fucking child.

3) Seriously? You are trying to claim that Harry's armor has no defense against physical weapons? When he lived in a world with guns and knives, and magical creatures like werewolves? When he frequently went into melee combat with his sword? When many spells uses physical objects as a medium? Lol. You are just digging yourself into a deeper hole.

Furthermore, let's dig into this a bit more. His armor, simply by it being made out of dragonskin, should have provided a lot of physical protection. And what are the enchantments for, anyways? Magical defense? Even though the armor itself, as you've noted, is already highly magically resistant?

So, the problem you are having is this. You just make things happen. You want something, and you just write it, with no regards to logic or consistency. Then, when someone points that out, you try to backpedal and patch it up, again, with no regards to consequences, ending in even more problems.

Your other problem is that you seem to be incapable of writing any character other than angsty teenagers. Makes sense since you seem to be more focused describing physical attributes than making an actual character. This makes you fit to write a high school Harem anime, not about supposedly mature people.

You've clearly seen Supernatural. Some of the dialogues of Death is taken straight from that. Now, compare your Death, with that Death.

Do you know how much of a Black Hole Sue you just made Harry?

This group included EVERY leader of the horde, their guardians, Leader of the sentinels, and a dragon aspect. And they needed Harry to come same the day against some cultists.