Cafei
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Joined 07-19-07, id: 1330174, Profile Updated: 05-21-12
Author has written 1 story for Transformers/Beast Wars.

Name: Cafei

Age: 24

Occupation: Designer

Short bio: I'm short for my age and always have been and I've got wild curly hair. Humor to me is like crack to an addict.

I can be shy, but it doesn't take long for me to open up and be loud and annoying. I'm a Texan and no, I don't own a horse or a gun. I don't know why I've decided to try and write a fanfic, guess I was just talked into it. I love comics and cartoon art in general.

Shameless self promotion: http:///

Wanna see David? Go to http:///art/Fan-Character-Meme-74316688

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Collision by The Feesh reviews
What happens to a Mustang when a garbage truck T bones it at 60 mph? I don't know. Neither did Barricade. Bayverse, post 2007 movie. Reviews are what keeps me going.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 54,276 - Reviews: 823 - Favs: 591 - Follows: 572 - Updated: 11/2/2013 - Published: 7/15/2007 - Barricade
Fix You by Carebear1 reviews
Post Movieverse: Ratchet is faced with the tragic loss of his charges. How will he deal with the only survivor, the youngest daughter? NO PAIRINGS. Dedicated to the author of Iron and Grace. Please review! I love reviews! CHAPTER 37 IS UP NOW!
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 38 - Words: 172,339 - Reviews: 380 - Favs: 150 - Follows: 140 - Updated: 9/17/2012 - Published: 8/9/2007 - Ratchet
The blue we breathe by serpentnine reviews
Kain finds himself deposited twenty years too early in history, and must deal with the consequences. Warnings for underage abuse.
Legacy of Kain - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 9 - Words: 20,888 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 1/28/2012 - Published: 10/15/2006 - Kain, Rahab
Semantics by The Starhorse reviews
Prowl says 'potato', and Sideswipe says 'potahto'. You may guess where this is going.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 25,967 - Reviews: 219 - Favs: 465 - Follows: 117 - Updated: 1/20/2012 - Published: 5/1/2007 - Sideswipe, Prowl - Complete
Transformers: Juxtaposition by Vaeru reviews
Sparkbearer Saga: Part I. G1-based AU. A car wreck on a rainy night leads to the oddest partnership imaginable. A disembodied voice, possessed cars, alien robots, kidnapping, rescue, abduction, sparks, keys, and tomato sandwiches... Read if you dare.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 40 - Words: 123,067 - Reviews: 1789 - Favs: 1,504 - Follows: 726 - Updated: 8/2/2010 - Published: 3/30/2007 - Ratchet, Sideswipe, Sunstreaker - Complete
Wing Nuts by Thing With No Talent reviews
G1. Formerly 28 Aerialbots, until the crazy jets took over the story. We're flying without a destination now. Strap in and enjoy the ride. Barf bags are under the seat.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 32 - Words: 52,562 - Reviews: 420 - Favs: 162 - Follows: 123 - Updated: 6/7/2009 - Published: 11/8/2007
Portraits by Gloria Stone reviews
One knows the truth and the other is the light to show the way. She found him, saved him, and is repairing him. Was it the right thing to do? There is no right, No black and white, only gray Bonecrusher/Mikeala
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 13 - Words: 79,163 - Reviews: 259 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 9/14/2008 - Published: 10/1/2007
What's Wrong with a Little Destruction? by ajremix reviews
IDW 'verse. Various drabbles for the most badass strike force the Autobots have to offer: The Wreckers.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 150 - Words: 167,378 - Reviews: 1512 - Favs: 206 - Follows: 82 - Updated: 9/6/2008 - Published: 8/22/2007 - Springer - Complete
The amalgamation of Apathy by Lnzy1 reviews
JUX One-shots. Cafei and Evelyn's mis adventuers aboard the Autobot ship, Metellus Cursor. Previously titled "Hygiene high-jinks". Boring situations often yeild the most entertaining results.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 6 - Words: 19,836 - Reviews: 88 - Favs: 83 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 8/18/2008 - Published: 3/11/2008 - Complete
Mark by NekoHitori reviews
A "Contra Mundum" gift fic. A look into the past shows that there's more than one reason why David chose the Adams Mark Hotel.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,032 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Published: 6/30/2008 - Complete
Impaired by Gaia Faye reviews
The Holy Mother is not yet empowered, and for a certain sacrament, death is not the end. SH4, post '21 Sacraments' ending. Contains semiSLASH.
Silent Hill - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 125,162 - Reviews: 398 - Favs: 280 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 6/21/2008 - Published: 6/14/2005 - Henry T., Walter S. - Complete
Jux: The Chance Chronicles by lightningmouse reviews
An off-shot of the Juxtaposition AU, written for the Fan-Fanfiction contest hosted by Vaeru & Cafei. Take a Decepticon saboteur, Wheeljack's lab and 2 displaced Earthwomen, then see what you end up with... AN: Presently on Hiatus because of Ghost Unit.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 9,272 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 6/2/2008 - Published: 1/26/2008
One Large Coffee And A Lambo by TheMinttu reviews
Sam just can't get himself up in the morning without coffee and his escort is not impressed by the fact. Overreaction leads to vengeance. My first TF fic oops.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 17,476 - Reviews: 112 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 6/1/2008 - Published: 4/1/2008 - Complete
For Want of Chocolate by NekoHitori reviews
A Juxtaposition fanfic. Three women discuss the foods that they miss most. Rated PG-13 only for language.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,987 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 5/25/2008 - Published: 4/6/2008 - Complete
Our Lady of Blessed Acceleration by Cazcatharsis reviews
07verse: Two girls and one fine freakin' Pontiac. How does one balance everyday crisis with daily meetings with alien mechs and stay sane? Now with 27% more ninjas!
Transformers - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 20 - Words: 62,619 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 243 - Follows: 58 - Updated: 5/23/2008 - Published: 4/29/2008 - Barricade, Mikaela B. - Complete
Learning Curve by The Moonless Night reviews
Movieverse The Autobots, warriors turned refugees, hide on earth in plain sight. Can they learn to get along with their new human neighbors, or will they ultimately be revealed by simple misunderstandings?
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Drama - Chapters: 16 - Words: 41,121 - Reviews: 529 - Favs: 416 - Follows: 265 - Updated: 4/15/2008 - Published: 7/12/2007 - Complete
On The Care And Feeding Of Humans by Vaeru reviews
Transformers AU. Juxtaposition side story. So you think you're ready for a human all your own, but do you know how to care for one? ... Ratchet and Wheeljack are doing their best to figure it out.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 12,646 - Reviews: 382 - Favs: 420 - Follows: 236 - Updated: 4/7/2008 - Published: 6/22/2007 - Sideswipe, Ratchet - Complete
REM by rrdt reviews
Sam dreams, and in his dreams, things aren't the way they're supposed to be.
Transformers - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,782 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/30/2008 - Sam W., Bumblebee - Complete
Jux: A Grand Scale Love Song by ajremix reviews
Based off Vaeru's Juxtaposition series. All sentient beings can feel love. Even the largest of them all. Utter. Crack.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,644 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 88 - Follows: 26 - Updated: 3/19/2008 - Published: 3/9/2008 - Complete
Requiem by Vaeru reviews
G1. Jazz centric. Redline's hands were pure white, at odds with the deep blue and silver of the rest of his paintjob. Jazz remembered those hands very well. They had been the last things he had seen.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,841 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 196 - Follows: 35 - Published: 3/13/2008 - Jazz - Complete
Unexpectedly Blue by ryagelle reviews
Complete! In which Wheeljack discovers that love is usually found where you're not really looking. Slash, G1, sequel to Twinning the Hatchet and Cave Canem. All characters property of HasTak, not me.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 37,810 - Reviews: 234 - Favs: 289 - Follows: 101 - Updated: 3/8/2008 - Published: 1/2/2008 - Wheeljack, Bluestreak - Complete
Cow Tipping by Sakon76 reviews
2007 movie. More than one alien species has visited the Earth. A close encounter of the fourth kind.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,135 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 104 - Follows: 17 - Published: 2/21/2008 - Complete
Breaking The Wall by Vaeru reviews
Transformers AU. Sequel to Dreaming of Who? Metellus’ human menagerie just keeps growing. Meallanmouse’s fanfanfiction prize.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,532 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 7 - Published: 2/17/2008 - Sideswipe - Complete
Masquerade by Aliet Faslami reviews
Movieverse 2007 An accident leaves both the Autobots and their companions in a dangerous predicament. The threat of Decepticon reinforcement looms on the horizon, leaving both victims and veterans scrambling for a solution in time. Rating changed.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: M - English - Adventure - Chapters: 13 - Words: 61,037 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 49 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 2/5/2008 - Published: 8/19/2007 - Complete
It's Not Funny by Koi Lungfish reviews
G1, S2 - A domestic abuse charity ask Jazz to help them reach out to Starscream. Implicit slash, explicit violence.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Drama/Tragedy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,975 - Reviews: 108 - Favs: 113 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 1/28/2008 - Published: 1/23/2008 - Starscream, Jazz - Complete
Wicked by Lady Draculea reviews
Apparently one promise of death wasn't enough. Now, Mia has to deal with another type of fear following her, one just as likely, if not more so, to leave her dead and forgotten.
Dracula - Rated: M - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 14,015 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 11/8/2007 - Published: 2/19/2007
For want of a lab rat by MariaShadow reviews
G1, Humour. Happy Ratchet plus new Something equals Very Bad. Rated for minor cursing
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,292 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 13 - Published: 6/2/2007
Captive of the Immortal by Brickouse18925 reviews
In the year 2116 Vampires along with other nightly creatures made themselves known to the human race and rule over the night. Now humanity lives in fear. Rebecca Feilds has been captured to serve the Vampire lord, Athan. This is her story.
Vampires - Rated: T - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 17 - Words: 38,495 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 119 - Follows: 102 - Updated: 5/1/2007 - Published: 9/28/2006
Cider by Giraffe on the Moon reviews
Raziel selects a young woman arbitrarily on one of his hunts during his glory days, and agrees to grant her a last request for a cup of cider. Please Review.
Legacy of Kain - Rated: K - English - Supernatural - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,337 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 10 - Published: 12/16/2006 - Complete
They Wouldn't Believe You by Shadowjewel reviews
To grow, to learn, to live...Some people go through life, and its twists and turns on their own...some do not... RealWorld ish ,Nosgoth crossover, set post Defiance
Legacy of Kain - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 58,633 - Reviews: 76 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 16 - Updated: 9/12/2006 - Published: 10/19/2005
Blue 42 by The Starhorse reviews
Beware of irritating Prowl. It does not pay.
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,295 - Reviews: 80 - Favs: 471 - Follows: 54 - Published: 6/16/2006 - Complete
Don't Panic! by boz4PM reviews
Penny is panicking. Where is she? How did she get here? How is she going to get home and whose backside will she kick first when she does? A woman lost in Middle Earth wearing only her pyjamas. This can't be good... (STRONG language; NOT a M-Sue)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Humor/Angst - Chapters: 27 - Words: 136,860 - Reviews: 1384 - Favs: 2,538 - Follows: 558 - Updated: 3/27/2004 - Published: 1/17/2004
Contra Mundum reviews
Transformers AU. Decepticons have spread through the universe, conquering and plundering. Autobot forces are stretched far too thin, and they cannot save everyone...
Transformers/Beast Wars - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 20 - Words: 84,041 - Reviews: 232 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 2/28/2010 - Published: 8/1/2007