November 2012: Holy hell, I'm still getting reviews for this stuff! The e-mail account I have set up for this profile isn't my main one, the result being that I haven't checked it in about two years. In short: my thanks to everyone who has ever read these silly things I wrote in high school. To those who enjoyed them, I'm glad! To any complainers: boo. Boo, I say.

Anybody wishing to read the long-removed original installment, Twilight in Five Minutes, may contact me via the aforementioned rarely-checked email, which I will make an effort to check with some regularity: vmustachio@

I'm vaguely considering tweaking these stories, mainly the Breaking Dawn parody, because that one was written in a huge rush so it would be ready to show to a friend as his Christmas present. As such, I recall it being...not too funny at all, really. We shall see.

:Have YOU been dazzled today?: