Yo! Like my fan fics?

Then check out my original works!

The Nightmares of Alamir Book 1 (https : / / www . amazon . com / dp /B07TSTTWYT) [Remove the Spaces]

The Nightmares of Alamir Book 2 (https : / / www . amazon . com / dp / B088DFDBQ6) [Remove the Spaces]

(Two books! Yes baby, we're getting there!)

You all know my story.

Kicked out of my house by my father for telling him to stop being a controlling ass.

Got some of my siblings to see him as the douche he is and we left together.

Later, he went around telling everyone that I'm responsible for all their problems.

Yadda yadda yadda.

Are you still reading this? Really you need to get a life fella.

Likes: torture, maiming, murder, rape, telenovelas and Justin Beiber. You know, the good stuff.

Dislikes: Goodness. Fluff. Puppies. Kittens. Cute ness. Ugh, sickening.

Favorite activities: roasting, barbecuing, and anything that can be done in a place with a lot of fire.

Least favorite: any activity that has more than two men present at the given time.

Cameos: You may know me from movies, TV shows, South Park and Rick and Morty. Also did a stint as a red head with a siscon fetish and a silver haired maid one time.

Wait, you still reading this?

Damn, and I thought I was lifeless.

Go check out my fics if you like depravity and good ol fashioned human barbarity. Or don't, and be a pussy.

Now, I'm off to go molest some kittens.

Update: 8 - Jan - 2019

Political Views: I don't give a shit about political agendas, unless the agenda is abolishing political correctness. Also, don't bullshit me with Political Correctness. I write what I write how I write. Don't like it? Well fuck you.

Religious Inclinations: I can ask for Jesus Versus Thor in a Death Battle, and no one bats an eye. Ask for the Prophet Mohammed versus anyone, and everybody loses their heads. Sorry, not fucking fond of shit I can't fucking joke about without triggering some bearded motherfucker who'd want to kill me for heresy. On another hand, these guys get to keep female slaves as wives... so that's pretty fucking cool in my book.

Thoughts and Comments:

1. At the end of the fucking day, meatbags will be meatbags.

2. Every fucking snobby fan fiction "connoisseur" was once an amateur who gushed over Mary Sue stories without plot development. Just cause you've read a lot of works, doesn't mean you can go around leaving snobby reviews like a fucking Goodreads critic. Your favorite story was once someone's drunken vomit on a keyboard.

3. Every fanfic is wish-fulfillment. The best written ones just make you believe it isn't.

4. Stop calling women sluts and stop slutshaming. If we fucking make the women who like having tons of sex ashamed of having tons of sex, who the fuck do you think loses here?

5. Do not kill dogs.

6. A girl's life is not more valuable than a guy's life. Fan Fic writers, stop with this bullshit. Your protag can kill a hundred male minions, but suddenly, he fails to kill the only female minion because she's a woman? That's fucking stupid.

7. Also, don't kill a thousand minions and let the main big bad go. That's just fucking hypocritical. (Looking at you, Batman).

8. Yes, Batman doesn't kill, but hey, he beats you into a bloody pulp and leaves you hospitalized. What's stopping him from breaking the Joker's spine, I wonder?

9. The smarter you think you are, the dumber you actually are.

10. Lemons.