Mercator
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Joined 12-31-02, id: 318336
Author has written 11 stories for Discworld.

2005 Update*

Now that the "Lamb" story is finished, I have to
announce my semi-retirement from fanfiction. I'm about
heartbroken right now because I don't know if I'll ever get around to
writing another Hanna-Havelock story, but pressures from real life and
paid writing life make it pretty unlikely. If I *do* put out stories
this year, they'll be short -- so no more twisty novel-like plots. I
have to save that for my original fiction. The end of "Lamb" leaves me
lots of options to do fun little things, so I hope when I wrote
semi-retirement above, it's true.

Thanks to all readers,
reviewers, lurkers, fans and friends. I've had a great time
entertaining you (and myself). Now, back to the original
profile...

Strictly Discworld fanfic writer. My little fan
base out there (*waves*) knows I like plotting, and I'll probably never
write a story whose main point is who loves/is attracted to/wants to
sleep with/marry someone else. I do have a sappy side. I usually try to
suppress it but it doesn't always work (See "Your Lips, My Dear, Are
Like Giblets.") I also have a frisky side that is always het (See "Say
Yes" in R section).

I'm willing to eat just about anything if it's dipped in chocolate. I
do a lot of sports so I can keep up the habit without guilt. I like
beer, but I like cognac better. I'm a journalist (published nonfic
book/newspaper/magazine articles), teacher and general daydreamy type.
I live in Germany though I'm not German. There's enough room in my
heart for my husband and Havelock Vetinari. My cat and Wuffles would
get along beautifully; they share the same views on flatulence.

Super-duper sunny happy updated organized story list 2004*

I've gotten questions on what order to read my stories in, so here's a handy dandy help list:

The Seamstress Series:

1. Say Yes -- This is the start of it all, the twisted machinations of
his lordship and the introduction of the seamstress Hanna Louria Stein.
Rated R for plot-driven friskiness.

2. Conspiracy of Beers -- The first year of Hanna's contract, when
Ankh-Morpork's brewers cause things in the city to go BOING. Who gets
to fix it? Vetinari, of course, with the help of his new seamstress,
who happens to get herself accused of treason.

3. Vetinari in Absentia -- His lordship (deposed by a scheming Lord
Downey) sent into exile on a tropical island with only Hanna, a couple
pigeons and the will to intrigue. Meanwhile in Ankh-Morpork, Vimes
& co. destabilize the new regime. Yes, things go BOING here too.

4. His Lordship Had a Little Lamb -- Even seamstresses need a holiday,
especially from a client like Vetinari. Hanna visits his auntie Madam
Meserole in Pseudopolis and promptly gets herself entangled in maritime
mishaps and international intrigue with a Cold War flair.

5. Fangirls and the Men Who Love Them -- This isn't officially a
seamstress series story, though Hanna is in it. This bit of mischief,
if it was in the series, would happen sometime before Vetinari gets
sent into exile.

The rest are one-shot stories:

And your lips, my dear, are like Giblets -- The Drumknott/Cheery extravaganza has an "update" in Fangirls.

Possession: My darkest fic, a straight romance, and a real one-shot, i.e. I *won't* be writing a sequel.

What All Rulers Want: Long, dark and romantic. No sequels planned, I just won't get to it.

Live Journal: http:///users/mercator1/

Deviant Art: I do very amateurish sketches and collect good DW fanart from other people. http:///"

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

His Lordship Had a Little Lamb reviews
Madam Meserole is in trouble. To help, Hanna and a gentleman smuggler hunt for the most dangerously delectable substance on the Disc. That's got Vetinari worried, along with those compromising iconographs. (4th in Seamstress series-FINI-
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 60,097 - Reviews: 148 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 1/18/2005 - Published: 8/18/2004
Possession reviews
Lord Vetinari hatches the most elegant and ambitious plan of his life. All he needs is time, patience and a little girl...FINI
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 10,574 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 8/8/2004 - Published: 7/24/2004
Fangirls and the Men Who Love Them reviews
A Moral and Uplifting Tale of Witches, Watchmen, Palace Inhabitants, Music, Hysteria, Hip-dancing, Blackmail, Black Leather, and several Violations of Ankh Morpork Laws & Ordinances. (FINI)
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 13,791 - Reviews: 103 - Favs: 35 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 7/15/2004 - Published: 5/3/2004
Vetinari In Absentia reviews
Vetinari has no job, no home and no money. What he does have is his mistress, his wits and a motley group of allies. Does Downey stand a chance? 3rd in the Seamstress Series (Began with Say Yes). FINI!
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 38,050 - Reviews: 115 - Favs: 54 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 4/16/2004 - Published: 2/13/2004
What All Rulers Want reviews
LAST CHAPTER and epilogue (in which the last mystery is explained)- There's something strange about Lady Vetinari and Vimes is going to find out what. If those murders don't get in the way. And what's Margolotta got to do with it all? FINITO
Discworld - Rated: T - English - Mystery/Adventure - Chapters: 22 - Words: 73,585 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 2/3/2004 - Published: 11/24/2003
From the Office of the Patrician reviews
Lord Vetinari knows what you've been writing about him. He is not pleased...Ch7! A sweet-tart danger stalks the streets of A-M...
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 5,363 - Reviews: 113 - Favs: 50 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 12/13/2003 - Published: 1/3/2003
Conspiracy of Beers reviews
The brewers of A-M are lining up for battle. And everyone knows Vetinari doesn't drink (when anyone's looking). SEQUEL to and spoilers for Say Yes (R-section). This baby is finished!
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 21,124 - Reviews: 37 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 10/4/2003 - Published: 8/26/2003
Bath Day reviews
Ah...There's nothing like a good, hot bath. What are characters in the DW doing in the tub? Peek and find out!
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,404 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/30/2003
Say Yes reviews
Hogswatchnight, and a seamstress becomes a very special gift for a very exclusive Client. But all is not what it seems... **FINI**
Discworld - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 16,012 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 97 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 8/17/2003 - Published: 6/15/2003
And Your Lips, My Dear, Are Like Giblets reviews
A romantic farce starring Ankh-Morpork's most efficient Palace clerk. **FINISHED!!!**
Discworld - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 8,000 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 5/7/2003 - Published: 4/11/2003
The Black Knight reviews
Poor Vetinari. It was supposed to be a simple chess game. But wizards are such sore losers. ***FINISHED***
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,901 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 2/25/2003 - Published: 1/15/2003