Hello to everyone who accidently landed on my profile!

"I'm evil mastermind. Things I like and things I hate... I don't feel like telling you that. My dreams for the future... Never really thought about it. As for my hobbies... I have lots of hobbies."

But because of I'm not like Kakashi I'd tell you some more stuff about me:

What I look for in Fanfiction: Realistic stories, a plot, suspense, good fights, violence and blood, twists, mind games, badass villains, something that puts me on the edge of my seat.

About my stories: I will always try to write them as realistic as possible. I won’t use too much romance. Instead I’ll use torture, violence, horror. (In reality I’m actually a quite silent and peaceful person. Really!) My stories will always have a decent plot line. Also there will mostly be a hint of criticism against the messed up world we live in.

What I absolutely hate in Fanfiction: Mary-Sues. OOC-ness. Soft villains. Making characters stronger/weaker than they actually are. Couples that don’t fit at all.

Favorite series: 24, Simpsons, Lie To Me, Supernatural, The Originals, Vampire Diaries, The Newsroom, Sherlock, Hannibal

Animes I’ve watched so far: Avatar: The last Airbender, Legend of Korra, Naruto (Shippuuden), Fairy Tail, Elfen Lied, Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood, Wolf’s Rain, Death Note, K-Project, Bleach, Hellsing Ultimate

Favorite quotes:

Naruto

Dear Jashin,

You took away my favorite sensei, Asuma.

You took away my favorite bad guys, the Akatsuki

You took away my favorite hero, Pervy-sage

You took away my favorite Uchiha, Itachi

You took away my favorite old lady, Chiyo

Just to let you know,

Sakura Haruno is my favorite character.

- "I believe that someday the day will come when people truly understand one another." Jiraya

- “When you have power you become arrogant and isolated from the world.” Itachi

- “I knew that from the first time I had to kill my comrades... Kill a Kiri ninja as a Kiri ninja. What does that make me? Am I a friend or foe? What is my purpose and my position? Where do I go? Where can I go? I'm well aware that my entire life has been a one giant lie.” Kisame

- “No, you don't get it, that’s why I'm telling you. You think you get it, which isn't the same as actually getting it. Get it?“ Kakashi

- “No matter what you decide to do from now on… I will love you forever.” Itachi to Sasuke

- “No matter who you are… you don’t know what kind of human you are until the very end.” Itachi

- "Fine art is something wonderful that's left long into the future... eternal beauty." Sasori

- "I don't care who I have to fight. If he rips my arms off, I'll kick him to death. If he rips my legs off, I'll bite him to death. If he rips my head off, I'll stare him to death. And if he gouges out my eyes, I'll curse him to death." Naruto

- “Itachi… It seems I wasn’t such a worthless human after all.” Kisame

- "Then I will break that curse. If there's such thing as peace, I will find it. I won't give up." Nagato/Jiraya/Naruto

- "Those who break the rules and regulations are scum. But those that abandon their comrades are worse than scum!" Obito

- "People live their lives bound by what they accept as correct and true. That's how they define reality. But what does it mean being correct or true?" Itachi

- “Flowers cannot bloom in a world without light!” Konan

- "All your hard-working will prove worthless... unless you believe in yourself!" Might Guy

- "Dying like trash... never-ending hatred... pain that never heals... that is war." Nagato

- "You changed me! Your smile is what saved me! That's why I'm not afraid to die protecting you. Because I love you." Hinata

- “We all intend to follow the right path, but when faced with extreme pain we will ourselves with hatred. We become rogue.” Madara

- "Religion, ideology, resources, land, grudges, love or just because... No matter how pathetic the reason, it's enough to start a war." Nagato

- "Pain, sadness... and joy. These feelings allow you to understand others." Gaara

- "When captured birds grow wiser, they try to open the cage with their beaks. They don't give up because they want to fly again." Genma

- "When people get hurt, they learn to hate. When people hurt others, they become hated and racked with guilt. But knowing that pain allows people being kind. Pain allows people to grow. And how you grow is up to you." Jiraya

- “Adults are stupid. If they want fights to stop, they should make an agreement with their enemy.” Tobirama Senju

- “Man seeks peace, yet at the same time yearning for war...those are the two realms belonging solely to man. Thinking of peace whilst spilling blood is something that only humans could do. They're two sides of the same coin...to protect something...another must be sacrificed.” Madara

- "I would describe myself as a human being who could not become a complete puppet, I am an unfinished puppet, whose lifeless frame still contains a beating heart at its core. I am neither dead, nor am I alive." Sasori

- “A smile is the best way to get away with trouble even if it’s a fake one.” Sai

- “In the end we cannot trust one another. If that is how humanity looks at the world, then we will have no future.” Gaara

- “Every jutsu has its weakness. This jutsu's weakness and risk is...the existence of me!” Itachi

- “You should give up… trying to make me give up!” Naruto

- “I've told you before. You shouldn't judge people based on appearances and your preconceptions.” Itachi

- “In this world, whenever there is light, there are also shadows. As long as the concept of winners exists, there must also be losers. The selfish desire of wanting to maintain peace causes wars and hatred is born to protect love.” Madara

- "When a person… has something important they want to protect… that's when they can become truly strong." Haku

- “When a man learns to love, he must bear the risk of hatred.” Obito

- “There's no advantage to hurrying through life." Shikamaru Nara

- “Sorry I'm late I'm afraid I got lost on the path of life...” Kakashi

- "Three times now, we've fought world wars for our own nations, our own villages. We've hurt one another. We've hated one another. That hatred bred a lust for power, and that lust for power created me. I was a jinchuriki, the embodiment of hatred and power. And I hated this world, and all the people in it. I wanted to destroy it with my own hands. The exact same thing Akatsuki is trying to do today. But one man, one ninja from Konohagakure stopped me. ...I was his enemy, yet he wept for me! I hurt him, yet he called me his friend! He saved me! My enemy, my fellow jinchuriki... He suffered the same pain as me, yet bore no ill will! There are no enemies here because we've all suffered at Akatsuki's hand! So there is no Suna, no Iwa, no Konoha, no Kiri, and no Kumo! There are only 'shinobi!' And if you still hold a grudge against Suna, when this war is over, come and take my head instead! Our enemies are after the friend who saved my life! If they take him, if we hand him over, our world is finished! I want to protect him! I want to protect our world! But I'm too young to protect it all on my own! All of you, lend me your aid! Everyone who's with me, let's go!" Gaara, the most epic speech ever!

Wolf’s Rain

- “The thing about fairy tales is . . . there's always some truth in them.” Quent Yaiden

- “I'm here...together with you. Something that I had almost given up hope on has come true. Whatever happens to the world, Cher, I want to have faith in the future.” Hubb Lebowski

- “Why? Why do humans always look to the sky? Why do you try so hard to fly when you don't have any wings? We'll run on our own legs.” Kiba

- “They say there's no such place... as Paradise. Even if you search to the ends of the Earth, there's nothing there. No matter how far you walk, it's always the same road. It just goes on and on. But, in spite of that... Why am I so driven to find it? A voice calls to me... It says, "Search for Paradise."” Kiba

- “It smelled like something interesting was going to happen, and I just followed my nose.” Hige

- “What’s the point of living if it means throwing away your pride?!” Kiba

- “Everyone’s gonna die. It’s a natural part of life. But if life has no purpose, you’re dead already.” Kiba

- “If I can be with you when the world ends, it’ll be enough for me!” Blue

- “When are we born? When do we die? Why are we born? Why do we die? The world has been destroyed and we’ve fallen countless times, always resurrecting from the ashes as Paradise. It has happened before, and it will happen again. An endless cycle of life and death.” Owl

- “I'm not obsessed, Cher. Don't worry. I'm probably just looking for another excuse to see you.” Hubb Lebowsky

Avatar

- “Perfection and power are overrated. I think you were very wise to choose happiness and love.” Iroh

- “Some friendships are so strong, they can even transcend lifetimes.” Avatar Roku

- “I will never ever turn my back to people who need me!” Katara

- “I know now that no one can give you your honor. It’s something you do for yourself by choosing what’s right.” Zuko

- “You miscalculated. I love Zuko more than I fear you.” Mai to Azula

- “I’m not looking for anyone’s approval. I know who I am.” Toph

-”The fire nation thinks they don’t need to worry about a bunch of kids living in the trees, maybe they’re right….or maybe they’re dead wrong.” Jet

- “For so long, all I wanted was for you to love me, to accept me. I thought it was my honor that I wanted, but really, I was just trying to please you. You, my father, who banished me just for talking out of turn. My father who challenged me, a thirteen-year-old boy, to an Agni Kai. How can you possibly justify a dual with a child?” Zuko

- “In the darkest times, hope is something you give yourself. That is the meaning of inner strength.” Iroh

- “Sometimes life is like this dark tunnel. You can’t always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you just keep moving… You will come to a better place.” Iroh

- “It’s time for you to look inward and start asking yourself the big question: who are you, and what do YOU want?” Iroh to Zuko

- "My whole life, I struggled to gain my father's love and acceptance. But once I had it, I realized I lost myself getting there. I'd forgotten who I was." Zuko

- "The monks used to say that revenge is like a two-headed rat-viper; while you watch your enemy go down, you're being poisoned yourself."Aang

- “You think youre the first person to believe their war was justified??!” Wan Shi Tong

- "It's easy to do nothing, but it's hard to forgive." Aang

- "I didn't know what or when, but I knew I'd know it when I knew it." King Bumi

- "Even though I was born blind, I've never had a problem seeing. I see with earth-bending." Toph

- “Azula always lies.” Zuko

- “I’m not Toph… I am Melon Lord! Muahahaha!” Toph

Avatar: The Legend of Korra

- “Admitting your fears is the first and difficult step in overcoming them.” Tenzen

- “When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change.” Aang

- “Be the leaf” Meelo

- “And I'm saving you for last, then you'll get your duel, and I will destroy you.” Amon

- “That lady is my hero.” Meelo about Bei Fong

- “The morning is evil!” Korra

- “The only thing bending has brought to the world, is suffering. It has been the cause of every war in every era. But that is about to change. I know you have been wondering, "What is the Revelation?" You are about to get your answer.” Amon

- “Korra and I are perfect for each other: she's strong, I'm strong; she's fun, I'm fun; she's beautiful, I'm gorgeous!” Bolin

- “And Bolin loses his noodles! Literally. Which reminds me, this match is brought to you by our sponsor, Flameo Instant Noodles! Noodliest noodles in the United Republic.” Commentator

- “It seems fitting that you celebrate 3 bullies who cheated their way to victory - because every day you threaten and abuse your fellow non-bending citizens, just like the Wolfbats did to their opponents tonight.” Amon

- “The trick is, whenever I get confused, I just say 'Republic City' or 'fans' and then everyone cheers.” Bolin

- “Even in the material world, you will find that if you look for the light, you can often find it. But if you look for the dark that is all you will ever see.” Iroh

- “You think freedom is something that you can give or take on a whim. But to your people, freedom is just as essential as...air.” Zaheen

- "New growth cannot exist without first the destruction of the old." Guru Laghima

Death Note

- “There is no heaven or hell. No matter what you do while you're alive, everybody goes to the same place once you die. Death is Equal.”

- “Call me what you want; I'm still taking your cake.” L

- “The person whose name is written in this note shall die.”

- “The real evil is the power to kill people. Someone who finds himself with that power is cursed. No matter how you use it, anything obtained by killing people can never bring true happiness.” Yagami Soichiro

- “Misa: I can't imagine a world without Light!” L: “Yes, that would be dark.”

- “This world is rotting…” Yagami Light

- “No Matter How Gifted you are… You alone cannot Change the World.” L

- “There are many types of monsters that scare me: Monsters who cause troubles without showing themselves, monsters who abduct children, monsters who devour dreams, monsters who suck blood… and then, monsters who tell nothing but lies.” L

Fairy Tail

- "Fairy Tail mages are specialize in property destruction"

- "There are people in this world that prefer solitude, but there isn't a single person who can withstand it." Makarov

- “We don’t die for our friends… We live for them!” Erza

- “Between the moment of our birth and the time of our death there is only that game of emotions we call life.” Jellal

- It's for my friends! For seven years...all that time...they waited for us! It was hard on them... They had sad times... They got humiliated, but they just endured it... And kept protecting the guild... It's for my friends! I want to show them...that Fairy Tail will live on!! That's why I gotta move forward!!” Natsu

- "Your darkness...I will...seal it..." Gray

- "Sorry, but it doesn't matter if you're a woman or even a child. I don't go easy on anybody who hurts my comrades.” Gray

- "So you're gonna end this by dying, huh? Stop running away!" Natsu to Gray

- "All I need is the power to be able to protect my comrades. So long as I can have the strength to do that, I don't care if I'm weaker than everyone in the world." Erza

- "What I want isn't money or pretty dresses, but a place that recognizes me as who I am.” Lucy

- "As long as you laugh at people's suffering, your goal will always be out of reach. If you never want to be defeated, you must first learn your own weakness " Erza

- “Fear is not evil. It tells you what you weakness is. And once you know your weakness, you can become stronger as well as kinder.” Gildarts

- "I wonder for how long... How long will I remain anchored at this harbor known as battle?" Erza

- "I am not alone. I can hear them... I can hear everyone's voices... I can sense everyone's feelings... I am not alone... everyone's feelings... they support me... they are what give me the will to stand and fight!" Natsu

- "We're not puppets!! We are... Fairy Tail wizards!!!" Happy

- "I'm not your owner. I'm your friend, right?" Lucy to Loke

- "Being alive...is a sign of strength!" Erza

- "No! Running away by myself? No way. It's always more fun when we are together!" Lucy

- “I was once weak, I was always afraid, I hid my tears, but I kept on going, I kept on believing, I followed my heart, I found my courage, and I realized if I hadn't believed in myself, then I wouldn't have become the person I am today” Erza

- “Weaklings will stay weak forever. But weakness is not evil, since human beings are weak creatures to begin with. Alone, you feel nothing but insecurity; that's why we form guilds, that's why we have friends. We walk together in order to live a strong life. The clumsy ones will walk into more walls than the others, and it may also take them longer to get there. If you believe in tomorrow and put yourself out there, you can naturally obtain your strength. That's how you will be able to smile and live strong.” Makarov

Bleach

- “When you're dodging, think "I won't let you hit me!" When you're protecting someone, think "I won't let you die!" When you're attacking, think "I will cut you!" Kisuke Urahara

- “Do you know why the big brother is born first? It’s to protect the little brothers and sisters that come after him.” Ichigo

- "I don't want to become stronger through the power I gain by killing and sacrificing another. If I can't win alone, then I'll win as a group." Halibel

- “There are two kinds of fights…fights to defend life and fights to defend pride.” Ukitate

- “War is not heroic. War is not exhilarating. War is full of despair. It is dark. It is dreadful. It is a thing of sorrow and gloom.” Izuru

- “Those who do not fear the sword they wield have no right to wield a sword at all.” Shuhei

- “Live well, Ichigo. Live well, age well, go bald well, and die after me. And... if you can, die smiling.“ Isshin

- "We women are easy prey for the males. I brought you here because I thought that it would be better if we worked in a group, rather than working alone.” Halibel

- The perfect being, huh? There is no such thing as perfect in this world. That may sound cliché, but it’s the truth. The average person admires perfection and seeks to obtain it. But, what’s the point of achieving perfection? There is none. Nothing. Not a single thing. I loathe perfection! If something is perfect, then there is nothing left. There is no room for imagination.” Mayuri Kurotsuchi

- “What is the point of hitting? Hurting those who hurt you... and what is left?” Chad

- “Fear is necessary for evolution. The fear that one could be destroyed at any moment.” Aizen

- "If you were to turn into a snake tomorrow and begin devouring humans, and from the same mouth you started devouring humans, you cried out to me 'I love you,' would I still be able to say 'I love you' the same way I do today?" Gin

- “Sanity? Sorry, but I don't remember having such a useless thing in the first place.” Zeraki

- “What is this "heart"? If I tear open that chest of yours, will I see it there? If I smash open that skull of yours, will I see it there?” Ulquiorra

- “There we go again, old men and their stupid arguments. What a pain.” Hitsugaya

- “This sea of blood covered in ashes... We refer to this hell as the world.” Halibel

- “What’s the difference between a king and his horse? I don’t mean some kiddy shit like one has 4 legs and the other has 2, or ones a person and ones an animal. If their form, ability, and power is exactly the same, then why is it one becomes the king and controls the battle and the other one becomes the horse and carries the king? There's only one answer...INSTINCT!!!” Hollow Ichigo

- "Our existence is built upon the noble sacrifices made. Instead, you fall in battle from trying to protect your subordinates. My subordinates were not simply defeated. They left behind markers for me, on how to carry on the fight. If I had lost, my subordinates' sacrifices would have all been for nothing. I hold within me the resolve of those who sacrificed their lives.” Halibel

- "I'm not superman, so I can't say anything big like I'll protect everyone on earth. I'm not a modest guy who will say it's enough if I can protect as many people as my two hands can handle either. I want to protect a mountain-load of people." Ichigo

“Bye-Bye!” Gin

Fullmetal Alchemist (Brotherhood)

- “What?! I'm not small! It's the world that's too big!!” Edward Elric

- “The Homunculi may have started the war, but we were the ones who carried it out.”

- “A hero in times of war will only be viewed as a murderer in times of peace.” Riza Hawkeye

- “Nothing is perfect. The world’s not perfect, but it’s there for us trying the best it can. That’s what makes it so damn beautiful.” Roy Mustang

- “I’M A HOUSEWIFE!” Izumi

- “Dogs embody loyalty they follow their masters commands above all else! Be a jerk to them and they don't complain and they never once beg for a paycheck! Trust me Fuery they're the great servants of man! Loyal canine how we salute Thee!” Roy Mustang

- “So we meet again you little bastard. I'm not going to drink you.” Edward to milk

- “Soldiers are supposed to protect the people. Why are we killing them instead?” Reza Hawkeye

- “You ask why we're out her killing civilians instead of protecting them? … Because this is a war and that's what soldiers do…” Kimblee

- “Stand up and walk. Keep moving forward. You’ve got two good legs. So get up and use them. You’re strong enough to make your own path.” Edward Elric

- “I could live forever. I have everything yet I can’t even save a loyal subject.” Lan Fan

- “Look straight at the person you kill. Don’t take your eyes of them for a second. And don’t ever forget them because they won’t forget you.” Kimblee

- “We are not gods or demons. We are just humans.” Edward

- “”Purge”, huh? What a convenient word to disguise indiscriminate slaughter.” Roy Mustang

- “Why do you fight?” Roy: “Easy. I don’t want to die. That’s it.”

- “We all have the eyes of murderers” Roy Mustang

- “You’ll embrace the woman you love with those hands covered in blood?” Roy to Hughes

- “Who am I? One name you might have for me is the world, or you might call me the universe, or perhaps God, or perhaps the Truth. I am All, and I am One. So, of course, this also means that I am you. I am the truth of your despair, the inescapable price of your boastfulness. And now, I will bestow upon you the despair you deserve.” Truth

- “We really are weak creatures, but that’s why we can strive to become stronger. Even if you feel it’s useless, each step we take leads to something great. That’s why I’m sure we’ll be able to change. Because we’re weak… and because death is inevitable… Humans try their best to live and end up becoming stronger.” Trisha Elric

"NO! I'm sick of watching people die, and I can't just sit back and take it anymore! I won't let anyone else get killed! Not when I can protect them!!" Alphonse Elric

- “No matter how many troops the country deploys, the desert just absorbs them like water. We suffer, conquer, and what’s left? Nothing but sand.” Roy Mustang

- “The power of one man doesn’t amount to much. But, however little strength I’m capable of… I’ll do everything humanly possible to protect the people I love, and in turn they’ll protect the ones they love. It seems like the least we tiny humans can do for each other.” Roy Mustang

- “Let me get this straight, you think surrendering, and offering yourself will stop the war? How arrogant. The life of each human is worth one, that’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.” Wrath

- “You want to bring back someone that you’ve lost. You might want money. Maybe you want women. Or, you might want to protect the world. These are all common things people want. Things that their hearts desire. Greed may not be good, but it’s not so bad, either. You humans think greed is just for money and power! But everyone wants something they don’t have.” Greed

- “A king is no king without his people, but a people without their king would be lost as well.” Lan Fan

- “Sacrifices are necessary. You can’t gain anything without losing something first although if you can endure that pain and walk away from it, you’ll find that you now have a heart strong enough to overcome any obstacle. Yeah, a heart made fullmetal.” Edward

- “…And yet, even if humans get discouraged after being beaten, and even if they get close to falling down after losing their paths, they continue to get up and fight. Everyone around them helps them get back up. And you’re envious of that.” Edward to Envy

Hellsing Ultimate

- "How beautiful. Nights like this make me want a bite to drink. Yes... I couldn't imagine a more... perfect evening." Alucard

- "Yes...excellent! I haven't had this much fun in ages! ...What did you say your name was?" Alucard

- "We ruin the countries we govern and the people in our care. We slaughter our enemies and sacrifice all our allies. We’ll keep killing till there’s nothing left but to destroy ourselves. It will never be enough." Alucard

Some Others

- “You're the weak one. And you'll never know love, or friendship. And I feel sorry for you.” Harry to Voldemort (Harry Potter)

- “There will be a time when we must choose between what is right and what is easy.” Dumbledore (Harry Potter)

" We've all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are." Sirius (Harry Potter)

- Voldemort: “Why do you live?” Harry: “Because I’ve got something that’s worth living for!” (Harry Potter)

- “It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to your enemies but a great deal more to stand up to your friends.” Dumbledore (Harry Potter)

- “It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be.” Dumbledore (Harry Potter)

- “Strength always comes with possibilities” Kusanagi Izumo (K-project)

- “No blood. No bone. No ash.” (K-project)

- “Hakuna Matata” (Lion King)

- "The past can hurt. But the way I see it you can either run from it or learn from it." (Lion King)

- "The first rule of truly living is to do the thing you're most afraid of." Rebekah (The Vampire Diaries)

- "People are never happy with what they have. They want what they had, or what someone else has." (Lucky Number Slevin)

- "You is kind. You is smart. You is important." (The Help)

- " Courage sometimes skips a generation. Thank you for bringing it back to our family." (The Help)

- "18 people were killed in Jackson that night. 10 white and 8 black. I don't think God has color in mind when he sets a tornado loose." (The Help)

- “I see dead people” (The sixth Sense)

- “Saving people, hunting things. Family business.” Dean (Supernatural)

- "You need more than guns to be a good gangster, you need ideas." (City of God)

- “If you make a mistake, run out of the building as fast as you can and keep running until you hit water. Then swim.” Charlie (The Newsroom)

- “I’m on a mission to civilize” Will (The Newsroom)

- “I have the confidence of a tall man.” Will (The Newsroom)

- “Brilliant! YES! Four serial suicides and now a note! Oh, it's Christmas!“ Sherlock

- „I’m not a psychopath. I’m a high-functioning sociopath. Do your research.” Sherlock

- “Every fairy tale need a good old-fashioned villain.” Moriarty (Sherlock)

- “Listen. This is my hard drive and it only makes sense to put things in there that are useful. Really useful. Ordinary people fill their heads with all kinds of rubbish. And that makes it hard to get at the stuff that matters. Do you see?” Sherlock

- “Brain’s the new sexy.” Irene Adler (Sherlock)

- “Anderson, don’t talk so loud. You lower the IQ of the whole street.” Sherlock

- “I just wanted to apologize. That's why I suffered all these tortures, didn't give up.” Lucy (Elfen Lied)

- “If I ever end up killing a lot of people... Kouta... Then please, kill me…” Lucy (Elfen Lied)

- “We hunt them, experiment on them, and then we kill them. And after all that we call them monsters?!” (Elfen Lied)

- “We stopped checking for monsters under our bed when we realized they were inside us.” Joker (Batman The Dark Knight)

- “You either die a hero or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.” Harvey Dent (Batman The Dark Knight)

- “Don’t ever let someone tell you that you can’t do something. Not even me. You got a dream, you gotta protect it. When people can’t do something themselves they’re gonna tell you that you can’t do it. You want something you get it. Period.” (The Pursuit of Happiness)

- “People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people.” (V for Vendetta)

- “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem.” Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Caribbean)

- “You’ll always remember this day as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow.” Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Caribbean)

- “If these men present the law, I’d rather be an outlaw.” (Lone Ranger)

- “Yippee Ki Yay Motherfucker!” John McClain (Die Hard)

Some other random quotes I found:

The pessimist sees a dark tunnel.

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel.

The realist sees the train that is coming closer.

The train operator sees the three idiots sitting on the rail.

I found this years ago in a English school book. And it’s so true! Read it if you're against racism:

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:

"When I was born I was black,"

"When I grew up I was black,"

"When I'm sick I'm black,"

"When I go in the sun I'm black,"

"When I'm cold I'm black,"

"When I die I'll be black."

"But you sir..."

"When you're born you're pink,"

"When you grow up you're white,"

"When you're sick, you're green,"

"When you go in the sun you turn red,"

"When you're cold you turn blue,"

"And when you die you turn purple."

"And yet you have the nerve to call me colored"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

-Be optimistic... all the people you hate are eventually going to die!!

-A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME, LET’S DO IT AGAIN!!"

-They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

-When life hands you a lemon, squirt life in the eye and run like hell.

- Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver.

-Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried slamming a revolving door.

-Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

-Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake

-Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, others just gurgle

-If you don't like my driving stay off the sidewalk

-Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

-I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?

-Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.

-You have a right to your opinions. I just don't want to hear them.

-I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

-Normal people worry me

-I did my homework! I just forgot to write it down.

-The optimist proclaims we live in the best of all possible worlds; the pessimist fears it is true.

-We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.

-Eat right, exercise, die anyway.

-I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing.

-Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

-They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

- Don’t steal! The government hates the competition.

-If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.

-Tell the truth and run.

-Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts.

-Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.

-If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over.

-Enjoy every minute of life. There's plenty of time to be dead.

-Education is important. School, however, is another matter.

-A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.

-Maybe this world is another planet's hell.

-A loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire his work.

-When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

-Some say the glass is half full, some say the glass is half empty. I say “Are you gonna drink that?”

-You know it's a bad day when you fall out of bed and you miss the floor

-War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.

-Growing older is mandatory. Growing up is Optional

-Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid.

-One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask directions.

-It's you and me versus the world...we attack at dawn.

-If all else fails, try reading the instructions.

-When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.

-If you can't convince them, confuse them.

-Ask me no questions, I will tell you no lies…

-Perfect men are only fictional.

-Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

-The trouble with life is there's no background music.

-I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

-Death is God's way of saying you're fired. Suicide is man's way of saying you can't fire me, I quit.

-And after Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F.

-A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

-When in doubt, push random buttons!

-You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

-You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

-Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

-God must love stupid people; He made so many.

-Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.