Favorite Color:Black

Favorite Story: Unforgotten Memory by axeloftheflame, Any DBZ by Laharls Vassal, The Truth by DBZ Awesum, Unwanted baby by Fujiko, and Wishes never Do Come True by Frozenflower.

12-15-12 I have been getting better with my moods but still get those feelings. I know I should probably get help but my friends are all the help I need. So yea I don't need any professional help. Keep reading, reviewing, and following me please.

12-30-12 I have achieved a goal I set myself. The goal was to finish my first 3 stories before 2012 ends and I finished them yesterday. I love reading sort of depressing fanfics about Goten but you know they always seem to have a happy ending. My stories may leave you with a what happens next thought but I might just make a sequel to the first one and end it the best way I can.

A Little About Myself

I love Goten

My friend (that I know personally) is Nerdist101 (check her out please)

1-25-13

My girlfriend broke up with me today after 5 months of dating we break-up. I was a little sad but I think I'm over exaggerating a lot. Anyway I will continue to make drafts but not post any stories until Nerdist101 and I are a good way through our story we're doing together. So until I can get her to write then type faster so I can have mine up goodbye.

1-28-13

This girl is an angel,can't you see her wings?

This girl is an angel, can u hear it when she sings?

This girl is an angel, she wears an eternal smile.

This girl is an angel, an angel that's sweet and mild.

This girl is an angel, she guides us day by day.

This girl is an angel, she knows just what to say.

This girl is an angel, but she hides a secret within.

This girl is an angel, with hidden scars upon her skin.

This girl is an angel, in the day she shines so bright.

This girl is an angel, but she looses he wings at night.

This girl is an angel, she hides he pain with tears.

This girl is an angel, but is consumed by sadness and fear.

This girl is an angel, but she cries herself to sleep.

This girl is an angel, but no one sees her weep.

This girl is an angel, but now shes lost her wings.

This girl is an angel, now she no longer sings.

This girl is an angel, but her smiles faded and gone.

This girl is an angel, an angel who doesn't have long.

This girl is an angel, but darkness has taken hold.

This girl is an angel, lying forever still and cold.

Another poemish story is called Unlikely Friends

I made a friend just then other day, I'd see them around but never want to play.

They're not exactly normal, in fact they're very shy.

Many people don't see them, as they walk by.

I didn't used to see them until the age of ten.

When suddenly they appeared but I ignored them then.

I didn't want people to think I was weird, if I went to play.

If they saw me playing with them God knows what they'd say.

I just wanted to be normal, I tried my very best.

But everyone ignored me, I was different from the rest.

No one seemed to like me, I felt lonely, hurt and sad.

Then I found them sitting there and didn't feel so bad.

They knew what it was like, to be abandoned and ignored.

I starting playing once or twice, but then our friendship soared.

We played almost every week, and then every other day.

We always did it in secret,we knew what people would say.

Soon we were best friends, we were playing every night.

But I noticed something felt strange, it didn't feel quite right.

The games have been comforting, but now its time for me to go.

The bigger guy can help me, he'll help me end this show.

I made some friends the others say, they really changed my life.

Do you want me to introduce them?, meet razor blade and knife.

Now for a poem called Misunderstood

No,I don't want your attention, that's not who I am.

I don't need your pity can't you understand?

You'll never know unless it happens to you.

When the darkness rolls in and runs through you.

You'll feel sad and afraid but no one will care.

They'll call you names and at your arms they stare.

They'll think of you as a freak and leave you behind.

Then the darkness moves in and devours your mind.

It engulfs your emotions and swallows then whole.

Tortures your mind and rips out your soul.

You feel nothing, all emotion is gone.

You cut to feel better but know it is wrong.

Soon you're addicted and use the blade everyday.

Your friends all hate you and you don't know what to say.

You miss the happiness and joy you once knew.

But they dissapeared so what can you do.

So many terrible memories haunt you from the past.

It makes you wonder how long it will last.

Will it get better? Is it worth the fight?

I'll just keep my head down and stay out of sight.

I don't want your attention, pity or advice.

I just want a purpose for this meaningless life.

Next is a poem about bullying

Another hurtful word is said.

Another drop of blood that's red.

Another insult whispered in spite.

Another lonely cry at night.

Another vicious rumor spread.

Another innocent teenager dead.

And finally a sad poem called Lullaby.

Hush little baby don't say a word, if daddy finds you you'll be hurt.

Stay very quiet underneath the bed, and don't you worry your pretty little head.

Hush little baby don't you cry, sissy will protect you so keep out of sight.

Daddy is home and he's coming up the stairs, please hide little one I can see you're sacred.

Hush little baby don't make a sound, daddy's trying to find you but you can't be found.

Sissy has hidden and you and you'll be safe,but now daddy's angry his eyes are full of hate.

Hush little baby don't you scream,just pretend them is a terrible dream.

don't watch daddy hitting sissy down,to the cold hard floor and bleeding on the ground.

Please little baby don't be sad, I had to protect you from our evil dad.

I lay here lifeless blood covering my head, I'm sorry little baby I didn't mean to wind up dead.

2-4-13

I found more poems Yay

Guaridan

Hush hush little dear, Endless pain and heart full of fear.

Hush hush my shining star, I feel your pain I have the scars

Hush hush sweet little thing, I have also felt the blade's cold sting.

Hush hush my little mite, I'll keep you safe and I'll hug you tight.

Short I know but what are you gonna do?

Things That Kill

Curiosity killed my innocence.

Over thinking killed my happiness.

Insecurities killed my self esteem.

Lies killed my trust.

Stereotypes killed my individuality.

And Judgement killed me.

Making Mummy Smile

I want to give in,I sometimes take a blade and slice my skin.

I hope you can forgive me mummy it helps with the pain, it make me feel better 'cause I can feel again.

I think I've cut too deep mummy there's so much blood, what should I do mummy its flowing like a flood.

I feel so cold mummy please don't feel sad, i'll be better next time for you and for dad.

2-11-13

More Poems.

Regrets

You're alone, without a friend.

This will be the very end.

You take a breath, breathe it in.

Reach for the knife and slice you skin.

At first it's pain, but that's all right.

You've felt this pain almost every night.

Now its bleeding, here comes the blood.

Gushing and flowing like a flood.

Now you're dizzy, stumbling around.

You trip, you fall, you hit the ground.

There's a puddle, it's on the floor.

A puddle of blood that's trickling to the door.

You're barely conscious, and feeling cold.

Death's bony fingers are taking hold.

It's scary in the dark , when you're almost dead.

You think of the life you had ahead.

Was this a mistake? What can you do?

I'm afraid it's already too late for you.

You're lying there, eyes closed tight.

Fingers forever gripping a blood stained knife.

China Doll

I used to have a dolly, a china one at that.

She had a pretty floral dress, and a pink straw hat.

She used to sit on my dresser with my teddy's, pictures and gems.

But now she sits with a suicide note, written desperately in pen.

My teddy's were replaced, my pictures faded and ripped.

The gems I held so dear were lost, cracked, and chipped.

Everything I held precious, faded from view.

And now there was emptiness, the darkness crept through.

I tried to cut away the pain, I tried to cut away my life.

The relief is only temporary, so I grabbed the kitchen knife.

Wrote a note that said I'm sorry.

Slit my wrists, blood poured down, good night, sleep tight my dolly.

Look I know these are sad, but that's who I am. If you don't like it, you don't like me. I have often thought about stuff like this, so don't push me. I have always chickened out, but if push comes to shove I will take my own life. Anyway enough about sadness for today. Keep telling yourself it will get better even when it seems it will only get worse. :-)

2-19-13

Sitting alone in my bedroom,hugging my knees as I cry.

Nursing the wounds on my cheek, as a tear slips from my eye.

I feel the hatred burning inside me, hatred for those who did me wrong.

Those people who called me a freak, and picked on me because I'm not strong.

The hatred is burning now, it hurts, I burst into tears.

What's the point of living, they've been hurting me for years.

The pain that burns inside, seeps through my skin.

I feel like my flesh on fire, the darkness coming from within.

The pain has stopped now, I look up to my surprise.

There sits a little demon, with red unblinking eyes.

I watch as it creeps closer, it extends a disfigured hand.

I nervously reach out to it, it gestures for me to stand.

It leads me out into the garden, our path lit by moonlight.

Over the fields and country roads, we disappear into the night.

It leads me to the woodland, I hear crashing waves of the sea.

Eerie music echos throughout the wood, it emerges and dances with me.

I'm dancing with a demon, dancing in the breeze.

Running with a demon, twisting through the trees.

The demon stops silently, slithers over and pulls me near.

Leans in very close, and whispers something in my ear.

I look up at my demon, into it's cold, cruel eyes.

I stumble back slightly, it's words leave me surprised.

The waves crash, against the jagged rocks below.

I beg for the demon to release me, I plead to it to let me go.

They say I jumped that night, that I committed suicide.

But they don't know the truth, of how I really died.

The hatred in harbored inside me, was the demon that lead me to my end.

The demon was my desire, it was my only friend.

This poem I love because it says to me that you never know how much a person could use a friend.They just might die, literally,for attention. I myself have thought about ending all the suffering, but I have people who love me, so I can't give up. If the pain becomes to great, I may think about it more, I may even try it but not to an extreme. Just remember all you cutters, people love you, and you would hurt them dearly if you died. Btw, Nerdist101 gave up with the idea of a compilation, so I'm posting again :-) I've already finished a story in the time it's took me to tell you guys this. Anyway Just thought I might let you know,

3-6-13

More Poetry

Never See, Never Tell

Nobody knows, nobody cares

nobody sees my endless nightmares.

Nobody helps, nobody tries,

nobody hears my desperate cries.

Nobody looks, nobody understands,

Nobody takes the knife from my hands.

Nobody visits, nobody found

Nobody saw my body lying on the ground.

Drunken Nights

Hide as you hear him stumble through the door,

Listen as he curses you, when he trips and hits the floor

Stay silent as you hear him shout and scream,

Pretend it's not happening and that it's all a dream.

Lay still as he stumbles away, as he goes to find another beer,

Lay still because you're dead now, you're safe my little dear.

These were short I know But oh well. I doubt anyone actually reads this, but if you do thank you. You took the time to read these poems and not get to the stories. Until next time, later. :'(

4-19-13

More Poems!

Serenade

So sweet the our, so calm the time,

I feel it more than a crime,

When Nature sleeps and stars are mute,

To mar the silence ev'n with lute.

At rest on ocean's brilliant dies

An image of Elysium lies:

Seven Pleiades entranced in Heaven;

Form in the deep another seven:

Endymion nodding from above

sees in the sea a second love.

Within the valleys dim and brown,

And on the spectral mountain's crown,

The wearied light is dying down,

And earth, and stars, and sea, and sky

Are redolent of sleep, as I

Of redolent of thee and thine

Enthralling love, my Adeline.

But lit, O list,-so soft and low

Thy lover's voice tonight shall flow,

That, scarce awake, thy soul shall deem

My words the music of a dream.

Thus, wile no singing sound too rude

Upon thou slumber shall intrude,

Our thoughts, our souls- O God above!

In every deed shall mingle love.

To F-S S. O--D-

Thou wouldst be loved?- then let thy heart

From it's present pathway part not!

Being everything which thou now art,

Being nothing which thou art not.

So with the world thy gentle ways,

Thy grace, thy more than beauty,

Shall be an endless theme of praise,

And love- a simple duty.

5-5-13

Time for a poem that is not one I may be proud of later. But I'm sure as hell, proud of it now.

Depression. A black hole that sucks everything good out of your life. It's like you're drowning, but you can everyone else breathing. It's an abyss that, once it gets you, wont let 'll never understand, no one ever does. Just leave me to die and rot in the dust. Why must I suffer? Why is it me? Have I done anything to be treated this way? This isn't the me, I wanted to be.But it's the only me I've got. Once again I ask you please,let me die and rot in the dust. I never saw this coming, few ever do.But I used to be like you. I don't know what triggered it, but what I do now is irreversible. I have to live, or die, with the decisions I've made. Please let me die and rot in the dust. I'm having a lot of thoughts,not all of them good. I didn't choose this path, it chose me. Cherish each moment, and be nice to all. So there's a less possibility, you'll end up like me. Hurting, and crying,wishing it would all end. Joke with you're friends but hide a deep secret within. This is the last time I'll ask you, so please obey this wish. Let me die and rot in the dust, or peacefully in a ditch.

I wrote this in study hall, while having nothing but a notebook, a pencil, and my thoughts. Hope you enjoyed.

5-6-13

These Poems I wrote again in Study hall. They're short but have meaning. Hope you enjoy.

Promises Unkept

Here I go mom, watch and see,

Be proud of what your little boy, grows up to be.

Don't worry mom, I'll be fine,

You take care of your life, and I'll take care of mine.

Thing will go great, I won't have trouble.

Nothing, at the moment, can burst my bubble.

I'll make it there, all clean and nice,

I won't gamble or roll any dice.

This mom I promised, before a loud bash,

That night your son died, in a terrible car crash.

Visit Yourself

Hi there, are you me?

Look at what I've grown to be.

I'm tall, I'm fit, I'm everything I'd hoped,

Everything I'd been put though, I had coped.

Wait where is she, where is Molly?

Is she upstairs with her dolly?

She isn't up there, where is she?

Her all grown up, I wanted to see.

What's that? WAIT!, she died?

Did her and another's car collide?

What are those on your arms?, those small lines?

You cut yourself, and hide behind invisible blines.

This isn't what I pictured not at all,

My life is mine, so it's my call.

6-25-13

Music Won't Last

have you ever seen kids on a merry-go-round, or listened to the rain slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterflies erratic flight, or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better sow down, don't dance to fast. Time is short, the music won't last.

Do you run each day on the fly, when you say "how are you", do you hear the reply?

When the day is done do you lie in bed, with the next one hundred chores running through your head?

You better sow down, don't dance so fast. Time is short, the music won't last.

Ever tell a child "we'll do it tomorrow", and in your haste not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch, let a good friendship die, cause you never had time to call and say hi?

You better slowdown, don't dance so fast. Time is short, the music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere, you miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day, its like an unopened gift thrown away.

Life's not a race, so do take it slower. Hear the music before the song is over.

Mirror Mirror

Mirror, mirror can't you see,

What you show is killing me.

Mirror, mirror look at my face,

It's so ugly, I'm such a disgrace.

Mirror, mirror look deep in my eyes,

Can't you see past all the lies?

Mirror, mirror look at my arm,

Scar after scar, left behind form self harm.

Mirror, mirror on the wall,

you've watch me grow, now watch me fall.

Mirror, mirror look at them now,

wondering why, wonder how.

Mirror, mirror you've never been my friend,

Are you happy you've finally seen my end?

10 saddest quotes ever!

1.) "Who do you turn to hen the only person who can stop you from crying, is the one making you cry?"

2.) "I understand that love comes with pain, but why did I have to love so much?"

3.) "The part that hurts me the most is knowing that I once had you, then lost you."

4.) "The worst feeling in the world is giving all the love you have, knowing it will not be returned."

5.) "It's hard to pretend you love someone when you really don't, but it's even harder to pretend you don't love someone when you really do."

6.) "How do you heel a broken heart, I have n idea where to start. Because everything I do reminds me of you"

7.) "Have you ever noticed the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and you can never have them."

8.) "I'm afraid to love so fast, because every time I do it never seems to last."

9.) "We were like Romeo and Juliet. I thought we'd do anything for each other, but /romeo never Broke Juliet's heart."

10.) "Words left unspoken are words leaving hearts broken."

11-16-13

Hi guys, It's been a while but I've had some electronics issues and just needed to let those of you who are reading this know. I have decided that I will try to get better with my depression. my 'friends' think its all an act to get attention. One of them knows true depression but still denies that I have it sometimes. And Nerdist101 was one that I could vent to before I thought she didn't care anymore. So this and another one of my friends are my venting places. No poems right now. I've posted enough here to make a small book anyways. See ya next time.