Hey! My name is Kitty! ='u'= I am a BIG fan of Harry Potter (the books are sooo much better), Gravity Falls, Teen Titans (the original not the shitty cartoon version that's on CN right now), Steven Universe, Rise of the Guardians, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir, How to Train Your Dragon, and Danny Phantom.

Just so you all know I'm not some stalker or something, I'll give you some basic info.

1. I'm 15

2. Yes I am a cat. Meow

3. I am a girl but make any sexist comments and I will kick your ass to Valhalla

4. I might be 15 but I also am in collage (it's this early collage thing don't ask)

5. My name is *beep*

6. I curse...a lot

7. I love all animals

8. I also love YouTube...I am phan trash

9. I'm pan (if you don't know what this means then either PM me or google it)

10. I have very long nails and I'm not afraid to use them

11. I have anxiety so pls be nice

12. YES I ALREADY SAID I'M A CAT DON'T QUESTION ME

13. I'm actually half cat, half human girl. But I'll still kick your ass

14. Meow

For anyone who wants to read my stories on inkitt the link is here! Enjoy!

When life gives you lemons, make apple sauce. Then sit back and leave everyone wondering how the hell you did that.

At weddings, old people always poke me and say, “You’re next!” So I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

My parents accused me of being a liar. I looked them in the eyes and said: “Santa, Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny” and walked away like a boss.

“WHY?!” “BECAUSE I SAID SO!” Good one mom, you should be a lawyer.

Cashier: Have a nice day!

Me: Don’t tell me what to do.

77% of girls think they're ugly, 100% aren't. If you're a girl, re-post this. (I'm pan, to me all girls are pretty.)

I don't care if you're gay or straight, everybody needs love.

I don't care if you're diseased with an incurable sickness, everybody deserves a chance.

I don't care if you're ugly or pretty, everybody has flaws.

I don't care if you're black or white, everybody has the same capabilities.

I don't care if you're weird, I am too, everybody is, however little.

I don't care if you're rich or poor, everybody needs warmth.

I don't care if you're different, everybody is.

Repost this if you agree with it.

Girl Comebacks!

Man: Where have you been all my life? Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the ends of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I could see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i together. Woman: Really? I'd put f and u together.

Man: Your eyes, they're amazing. Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Woman: About as much as when you got kicked out of Hell.

Girls, copy and paste this on your profile.

(I laughed so hard!)

"Disney taught me to never stop believing in my dreams.

Harry Potter taught me that love and friendship dominates all kind of evil.

Narnia taught me that we must all grow up and leave our childhood behind, but must never forget it.

Percy Jackson taught me that there's a hero in every one of us.

Glee taught me that no matter how different we are, there's always that one thing that we have in common.

How to tell if you’re a writer

-If you talk to yourself.

-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’)

-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’)

-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’

-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.

-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.

-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.

-If you tend to collect the Bic Stics people leave lying around, kind of like picking pennies off the ground.

-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.

-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.

-If people think you might have A.D.D.

-If you think it’d be cool to have A.D.D.

-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.

-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.

-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.

FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella.

BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and say 'RUN BITCH RUN!'

FRIENDS: Never asks for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, "THAT WAS FRICKING AWSOME!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you're not down anymore/Cry with you.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Return your stuff right away.

BEST FRIENDS: Keep your shit so long they forget its yours.

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's ass that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) (never drinking in my life so HAHA suckers)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Bitch, drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste."

FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!

FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

BEST FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

BEST FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and say 'its because your an ass isn't it?'

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter.

BEST FRIENDS: Will re-post this crap!!

Funny random shit!

1) Point at someone and shout "You're one of them!" Run and pretend to trip. Crawl away slowly.

2) Look at see through glass and when someone is on the other side shout "OH MY GOD, I'M HIDEOUS!"

3) Walk up to a small child that resembles you, and tell them that you are them from the future.

4) Put a dora doll in the middle of Walmart.When someone tries to pick it up yell "SWIPER NO SWIPING".

5) Run up to someone random on the street and slap them with a loaf of bread.

6) Go to petsmart and buy bird seed. Then ask the clerk how long it will take the birds to grow.

7) Go to McDonalds and ask for a happy meal with extra happy.

8) Bring a desk on an elevator. When people try to get on ask if they have an appointment.

9) Go to a pet shop, point at an employee, and shout "I WANT THAT ONE MOMMY!!!"

10) Follow strangers around a store and spray everything they touch with disinfectant.

11) Come late to school and when the teacher asks why say your pet rock had a seizure.

12) Go up to random people at the mall, show them your ID, and say, "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN?!"

13) Buy an ice cream, ask the cashier if they believe in unicorns then squish the cone on your forehead.

14) Go to a library and ask for a book on how to read.

15) Go to walmart and hide in a bathroom stall when someone opens it say WELCOME TO NARNIA!!

16) Go jump on a random guys back and yell (THE SKY IS FALLING RUN MAN RUN) and see what happens.

17) Run through a police station and yell " I finally escaped from prison!" .

18) Go to mcdonalds and ask for directions to burger king.

19) Go in a Dressing room at walmart, and yell " OH NO, Theres no toilet paper left !!"

20) Make a cardboard car and wait in a carwash line, acting if everythings normal.

21) Drive a tricycle past a cop while drinking a juice pouch screaming "YOU CAN'T CATCH ME".

22) Take a stuffed animal to the vet.

23) In a public place, hold up a box of cheerios and yell "FREE DONUT SEEDS!".

24) Go to mc. donalds and ask for fries without the potatoes.

Stuff to do on elevators

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"

2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.

3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.

4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5. Meow occasionally.

6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.

7. Say "DING!" at each floor.

8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.

9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."

11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."

14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.

16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.

17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"

18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"

19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

21. Swat at flies that don't exist.

22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.

23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.

24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.

25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"

26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.

28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.

29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."

30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.

31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.

32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.

33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"

34. Tell people that you can see their aura.

35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."

36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."

37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time” When someone walks in.

38. Push all of the buttons.

Repost this if you laughed

How to get kicked out of walmart

-pull out all the phones for display and as the alarm goes off yell "RED ALERT, RED ALERT DANGER, DANGER

-Take a fishing pole,get some of the worms then pretend to fish in the water fountain

-Go to the book section & everytime somebody says something yell "THIS IS A LIBARY" in their face

-(Requires a friend) take a rolled up poster & pretend to play swords with each other

-Grab some eggs & everytime you see a person come by throw them at them yelling "Look I just scrambled your eggs"

-Take milk and continually do spit takes

-Sneak up behind an employee breath heavily on their neck then say "I've been expecting you"

-(Requires a friend) Get you friend to push you up and down the aisles while both of you yell "I DON'T NEED NOOTHIN BUT A FAT-CAKE"

- Go to the work out area and teel people "Feel the burn,shed those pounds,build up a sweat, tread the mill

-Go to the old people diaper section open the package put on a pair in the right place and on your head then run around the store yelling "I'm a rugrat,Phil Lil stop eating bugs unless you give me any

-Go to the camping department and go into one of the tents and when someone wants to come in, tell them to bring a pillow from the home department

-(Requires a friend) Get into a shoping cart and have your friend push you around while screaming “The British are coming!”

-(Requires 3 people) 2 people get into the cart while the other pushes you around and the 2 in the cart shand up and do what Rose and Jack did on the Titanic

-Make a throne out of paper towel rolls and throw other brands at people walking by

STUPID PRODUCT LABELS:

On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping (Yeah, that's kind of hard to do, you know, use while sleeping).

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside (How fun to be a shoplifter).

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap (I never would have guessed).

On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost (Really? Amazingly ingenious).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down (Too late!).

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating (Fascinating. You learn something new every day. Like, the people who write this things are FREAKING MORONS!).

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body (Well, it would save time...).

On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery (Ya we can really help stop those traffic accidents if we just get those toddlers to stop driving).

On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness (I would hope so).

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children (Um. Okay...)

On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only (And my other options were...).

On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use (Which would be...?).

On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts (Oh wow. I didn't know that before).

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts (Amazing. No one could ever do that without the help of the instructions on this packet. Great).

On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands (I believe that was implied).

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly (So you don't want kids jumping off buildings, arms outstretched?).

Anyways, PEACE!

Kitty ='u'=