Announcement: I'm currently working as DADA professor on WritingKitten101's Hogwarts forum. Do check it out and mentioned I referredyou, too. As I am doing that, I may not do much updating (as if i wasn't already doing that) so...sorry.

Man I also just broke my "no c&p" oath. Whoops.

Hi I'm Orca2Whale. If you think you recognize my name, you've probably seen me on a gaming site somewhere, using the name of either Orcastration or Orca2Whale. If not, then I should introduce myself. I'm a gamer, writer, and artist that likes to porcastinate and is currently going through a routine of "gaming fanfic Harry Potter PJO Webisodes gaming again" thing so...

I appreciate criticism. No one can improve without it. I give it freely as well. I've read almost everything out there, and I know what to expect from a good fanfic. So here's a small list of things that I want to say before I start getting PMs about this:

~If I criticize something in your fanfic when reviewing, I will always put in at least 1 compliment for every 3 criticisms.

~I like keeping things canon, otherwise it's gotta be an AU. However, I don't mind reading other ships and stuff. I won't judge for that. But my definition of fanfic is "putting someone else's characters into different and uique situations", not "use someone's characters and do what I want with them".

Anyway, enjoy! Feel free to comment and stuff. I promise I don't bite. Unless you start cussing like Arion or something.

Also working on a fanfic where the current PJO characters come back 20 years later to CHB. Also working on a fanfic hats just a single chapter straight through. All Unpublished. Sigh.

Ships:

PJO/HoO: Percabeth, Jasper, Solangelo, Caleo, Frazel, Traitie, Lou x Cecil, Tylla, Gruniper, any other canon ships. I also consider Percy and Nico to have a brotherly hate/love thing going on. Same with Jason and Percy.

HP: Hermion (hermione x ron, idk the actual name), Harry x Ginny (im not even trying now), Neville x Luna

BNHA: Froppy x Tsukoyami, Midoriya x Uraraka, Ashido x Bakugo, Ojiiro x Toru

I will happily take fanfic ideas. However...I do have somerules:

1. Either it has to be true-ish to canon and fit with the general storyline/timeline. Or it has to be an AU. I prefer mortal AUs. Only exception: I'll mess up the years. Cuz years don't matter unless theyre from the same general universe. So HP x PJO stuff = fine.

2. I dont do crossover fanfic requests. Sorry. Nope.

3.Nothing not PG-13

4. I don't really like using OCs but if they're not too OP and fir with rule 1 I may allow it.

5. Will not be a priority. I work on other stuff first.

Favorite characters in PJO: (top picks)

1. Nico di Angelo

I could write an essay on this. He's the strongest character in the series. He survived Tarturus alone and didn't go mad, even after seeing it in its true state for multiple days. He transported an entire statue. Survived pain, gave up his childhood (at age 10 no less), admitted to something that was frowned upon in his time. Yet it's never been implied that he's suicidal or anything. And his powers. Like, Percy is powerful but just think about it. Percy didn't lose immediate family members. Nico did.

Just the fact that he's alive and sane should be enough to land him in Gryffindor, with being in Ravenclaw a close second (he came up with several plans, mostly on his own, and was adapt enough to keep two camps from finding out about each other, etc.)

Oh and did I mention he plays the part of "the guy who makes sure prophecies go the right direction"? Without Nico, there would be no Percy-and-Luke-defeat-Kronos. Without Nico, the 7 would be the 6. Without Nico, there would be no bringing back the Athena statue. Nico's the biggest hero in the series and no one acknowledges it. Not that he'd care but still. Show the guy some respect, yeah? I mean, he's only 12 during the Titan War, 13 in the Giant War.

Even Percy hadn't navigated the Labyrinth at 13. Much less taken a field trip to Tarturus..

2. Jason Grace

He's a good friend, a good leader...What's not to like? RIP Jason, this is why I never have you dead in my fanfics. You're a hero.

Also, Jason is strong. Like, if I had to list the 7 in order of power, it'd be Percy, Jason, Annabeth Frank, Hazel, Leo and Piper (they like tie or something) (In terms of fighting i mean. They're all powerful in their own way.)

3. Percy Jackson.

His powers are a little OP, but his loyalty flaw makes up for it. Ever noticed that Uncle Rick always balances out overpowered characters like Nico and Percy by stating their fatal flaw? That's a good move, Nico's flaw keeps him from being too OP and that's what Percy's flaw also does. Plus he's good for a laugh. Although his quest number is insane...yipes...

4. Will Solace

He has to fight to prove himself ("I'm just a healer, I can't fight or play music, etc."). He dates the "camp outcast". He always manages to keep a smile on his face. If this doesn't define bravery, nothing does.

Besides Nico. But Nico breaks all the molds.

5. Silena Beauregard

She's courageous (pissing as Clarisse, even Percy didn't do that), she was a strong character (bad only because she wanted good-totally deserves Elysium for her actions), and she was loyal to the good guys in the end.

6. Annabeth Chase

She's cool. She's smart. She's a true Ravenclaw. And she dates a guy with seaweed for brains. I like her. She and Hermione Granger would be friends.

PJO Characters and My HP House Sorting:

Gryffindor: Nico di Angelo, Percy Jackson, Glenson Hedgel, THalia Grace, Charles Beckendorf, Zoe Nightshade, Michael Yew, Apollo, Clarisse La Rue

Hufflepuff: Hazel Levesque, Frank Zhang, Bianca di Angelo, Jason Grac, Grover Underwood, Sally Jackson, Will Solace, Chris Rodriguez, Stoll Brothers (they're literally just Weasley Twins Jr. otherwise), Hermes, Poseidon, Aphrodite, Silena Beaureguard

Ravenclaw: Leo Valdez, Piper McLean, Annabeth Chase, Chiron, Rachel Dare,

Slytherin: Drew Tanaka, Ethan Nakamura, Luke Castellon, Alabastor C. Torringotn, Reyna (still failing her name, eugh...), Zeus, Hades, Calypso

Hatstalls: Nico could be a Ravenclaw/Gryffindor, Hazel could be a Slytherin/Hufflepuff, Frank could be a hufflepluff/gryffindor.

Percy Jackson questions

1) Favorite main guy character? Nico. He's way more detailed then you'd think he is.

2) Favorite main girl character? Sorry, Annabeth. Make way for R E Y N A. Or Silena. Both are pretty cool. Annabeth's not my fav fav but she's pretty cool. Reyna is like the popular girl that's really nice and Silena is...well, Silena.

3) Favorite god? Hermes. He's a cool god. Not too haughty, not too full of hot air, has a sense of humor. Great cousin to have.

4) Favorite goddess? Hestia. She's the only real decent female goddess.

5) Favorite minor goddess? Hecate, obviously.Although I do need to say that I do think Victoria (Greek form: Nike) is kinda sorta cool in her own way (Hey I played a game where VIctoria was a character. Don't look at me like that-she was nice in that game, abeit very powerless).

6) Favorite minor god? I'm going with Hypnos, just cuz I would qualify as a child of Hypnos, the way I fall asleep everywhere...

7) Favorite minor character? Silena, I already told you this up above.

8)Favorite monsters? Briares (Hundred-Handed One). I think he counts. Right?

9) Which god/goddess would be your parent if you could be a demigod? Either Hypnos, Tyche, or Hecate. I like to sleep, have weird luck with games (it's actually scary...I can hack a card game XP), and I like the idea of magic.

10)Which PJO Character Would You Date? If I had to? Jason. Otherwise, none.

11)Which PJO Character Is Your Best Friend? Jason, Will, Silena, or Hazel.

12) Which PJO Character Do You Hate? Apollo. He's too full of himself. But then again I did get either Hephaestus or Apollo or Hades on every quiz I took...Oh non-god characters? Oh, Bianca. Yeah she had it rough but she literally dumped her little brother ASAP. How rude.

13) You accidentally got stranded on a deserted island...who got stranded with you? Nico. Thanks a lot, dude. I wanted to go to camp, not here. Now rest up so we can get out of here, ASAP.

14)Favorite PJ&O Pairing? Percabeth or Caleo.

15)Favorite PJ&O Quotes?

~"Wake me up later."~Nico (me too lol)

~“Two hundred Romans, and no one’s got a pen? Never mind!" ~Mars (Me to my orch. Sigh..)

~“You trained Bill? Impressive.” ~Leo (Inside joke my friends and I have about Imaginary Bill)

~“Being a hero doesn’t mean you’re invincible. It just means that you’re brave enough to stand up and do what’s needed. ~Piper

The 27 Commandments of Fanfiction (a few of which I have blatantly ignored in the past)

1. Thou shalt not post a fic until it has been checked for grammar and spelling errors. The fanfiction gods hath given you a spellchecker on the computer for good reason. Use it.

2.Thou shalt not post a chapter of less than 100 words, unless it is a drabble. This displeases the masses.

3.Thou shalt not put author's notes in the middle of the story.

4.Thou shalt NEVER use text-speak in a fic, unless the characters are actually texting.

5.Thou shalt keep to one tense, and only one, throughout the story. Do not switch randomly.

6.Apply the above number 5 to POVs as well.

7. Thou shalt not get offended when someone makes fun of the crack pairing featured in your fanfiction. It probably is rather hilarious.

8.Thou shalt not use , ;, or :( in a fanfiction to show the emotion exhibited by a character.

9.Thou shall try-eth to keep characters in character!

10.Thou shall not treat every criticism as a flame.

11.The author's note is not a spot for your personal drama, and thou shalt not make it so.

12.Thou shalt not put any form of the phrase "first fic" in thy summary.

13. Thy created characters must not have names that exceed five syllables in length. Nor shall thy name have more than five words in length.

14. Thou shall not insert thyself into the story line as thyself or as a character- yes we know that you are in love with yourself and are very narcissistic, we just don’t want to read about how you end up with the main character.

15.If thou art writing a story that does not follow the original story line, point it out in the beginning.

16.Thou shall not make a person randomly smart or powerful unless stating a reason for the change (a good reason).

17.Thou shalt show and not tell.

18.Thou shalt not EVER use the phrase "I suck at summaries" in-est thine summary. This annoys thine readers.

19.Thou shalt not write the same way thou speak-est- writing is an art.

20.Thou shalt ALWAYS spell the word "okay" correctly. Using the letter "K" is an unacceptable compromise.

21. Thou shalt only use clichés when thou a) art writing a parody or b) find a new and interesting twist to make such clichés bearable to thine reader.

22. Thou shalt always separate dialogue from two separate speakers in two separate paragraphs. Otherwise thine readers shalt be confuse-ed.

23. Thou shalt not EVER make a chapter all one paragraph. THIS INFURIATES BOTH THINE READER AND THE FANFICTION GODS. They have given thee an ENTER key with good reason.

24. Thou shalt not write with thy caps lock on, it displeases the masses and causes thy readers to lose their vision and make angels weep.

25. Thou shalt know how to spell the character's names correctly before you writeth the fic. Misspelling the name of the main characters makes readers angry and distracts from the story.

26. Thou shalt not say in thine summary "summary inside". This shows lack of creativeness and infuriates the masses. The only exception is when a summary is cut short and a continuation of it lies inside.

27. Thou shall use paragraphs and space the story so it is not terrifyingly daunting to thine readers.

(Bonus rules-because I can)

28. Thou shall not use links to pictures instead of describing character appearances and scenes. Don't be lazy about this. Please. Links don't always last forever.

29. Thous shalt not add an OC that is overpowered compared to the rest of the characters or that is way too unrealistic (a prime example: a Big Three kid that could do everything Jason and Thalia combined could, plus was so good at self-defense while using electronics and was perfect in almost every way...yeah, no. Been there, seen that, ruined the story for me)

30. Thou shall write thine fanfic as if writing an actual original story, with regards to everything above.

31. Thou shalt not forget the disclaimer.

I promise to remember Percy,whenever I'm at sea.

I promise to remember Annabeth,whenever a spider comes at me.

I promise to protect nature,for Grover's sake of course.

I promise to remember Luke,when my heart fills with remorse.

I promise to remember Chiron,whenever I see a sign that says ''free pony ride''.

I promise to remember Tyson, whenever a friend says they'll stick by my side.

I promise to remember Thalia whenever a friend is scared of heights.

I promise to remember Clarisse, when I see someone who give sme a fright.

I promise to remember Bianca, whenever I see a sister scold her younger brother.

I promise to remember Nico,whenever I see someone who never plays the hero.

I promise to remember Leo, when I naje a promise to someone,

I promsie to remember Reyna, when I do something that's hard

I promise to remember Hazel, when I get a second chance.

I promise to remember Frank, when I have to take a chance.

I promise to remember Piper, when I see someone breaking the mold

I promise to remember Drew, when I have to do as told,

I promise to ackowledge the ignored, just as Ethan wanted,

I promise to think of Charles and Silena, when I see love that can't be broken.

I promise to remember Bob, whenever I see the stars

I promise to remember Rachel, whenever a limo passes my car.

Yes, I promise to remember PJO,
Wherever I may go!

I am a book freak, yes.

So what?

While I hole myself up in a good story,

you're off frying your brains.

While I lose myself in unknown worlds,

you're off playing Minecraft or World of Warcraft.

While I learn things you cannot imagine,

you're off failing school and your teachers and family.

I know more about some characters than I do myself—

characters you will never know.

I can survive my whole life in a world—

a world you will never see.

I know the secrets of people, places, and creatures—

all of which you will never meet.

I could ruin your life, if I had the heart to and if you and I were in one of the worlds I know—

and you would never tell the difference.

I create worlds, people, creatures, but most of all lives with my words that you call another boring subject—

something you will never experience the joy and pride of.

I have ridden on dragons, outwitted darkness, eluded death a thousand times . . .

I have saved lives, used magic, unraveled deathly secrets that could start wars . . .

I have swum with the serpents, flown with the pegasi, howled with the wolves . . .

I have stood upon the moon, fought in great battles, discovered new universes . . .

I have relived long-gone lives, shaped new destinies, guided the paths of others . . .

I have stepped into other worlds, become other creatures, experienced unimaginable things . . .

I have lived through wars, living nightmares, the worst of tragedies . . .

I have felt the joy, pride, and elation of just—knowing.

Knowing the fact that you would never learn what I have.

And never have I moved a single inch, as long as I read.

I have traveled universes while sitting in a corner with a book

For you one glance is what it took

To say it was useless and stupid

But you can never experience time travel or falling again and again,

You can never live a life of the first daughter who hates it or experience victory over dictators,

And other things I have,

Yet you claim that all of this is boring—

Boring, stupid, sad, uncool, dumb, even embarrassing.

You say that this is something no one can like.

And yet, here I stand, holding a book.

If you agree with what I have written, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to make our voices heard: Crystal Silvera, Akronite, Jasminehoran, Anjali Roongta

Today, writers are scorned because of those to unversed to know.

Strangers stab you in the front.
Friends stab you in the back.
Boyfriends stab you in the heart.
Best friends poke you with straws.

Let's eat, Gramma!
Let's eat Gramma!
PUNCTUATION SAVES LIVES.

I find inspiration in cooking, my family, and my dog.
I find inspiration in cooking my family and my dog.
COMMAS SAVE LIVES.

Dear Math,
Please stop asking us to find your X. She's not coming back, and don't ask Y either...

Dear Math,
I am not a therapist. Solve your own problems.

Dear Yahoo,
I have never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo it!"Just saying...
Sincerely, Google

Dear The Optimist, The Pessimist, and The Realist,
While you idiots were arguing whether the glass was half full, half empty, or half of both air and water hence always full, I drank the glass.
Sincerely, The Opportunist

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
I hate rhyming.
Zebra.

"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up," the sarcastic teacher said. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" inquired the teacher.
"Well, actually, I don't," said the student, "I just hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."

DO NOT READ THE NEXT SENTENCE.
You little rebel. I like you.

Real men don't sparkle. Real men defeat dark wizards.

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, but on Halloween, its encouraged. Does this make sense to anyone?

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Repost this if you truly believe in God

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I go out with you", and take into account the fact that I went out with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct . . . leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."

Profiles I like (I mean profiles, I have favorites for author works I like):

AlabstorTorrington