Draco Malfoy always seems to steal Hermione Granger away from the men she's bound to.

Edward Cullen is an alcoholic who hits rock bottom. One day, his sister Alice is handed a card – Only Call If Desperate & ALL Else Has Failed. She makes the call that will change her brother's life. His savior? Bella Swan. Complete

Got 'Best Angst' mention in 'Slash Backslash' contest! 'The way he looks at me makes me feel...uncomfortable.' Jasper's girlfriend's brother, Edward, keeps staring at him. Why? Who knows. Seems like even Edward is confused...SLASH, AH, very OOC.

For Jaeyliwood's Sexy Eddie contest. A prisoner has been causing trouble and Officer Swan must punish him for his antics. Lemon ExB

The full story to the Red Ribbon assassin-Finalist to Tattward and Inkella Contest: She finds every corpse he hides. She follows every trail he leaves behind. A ribbon. A clue. A crime. She doesn't know he'll do anything to keep her alive.

Edward Cullen and Bella Swan are best friends. They've went through everything together. Divorcing Parents, Psychotic teachers, Bitter Break-ups, and now something that neither ever thought would happen...Parent hood! Full Summary Inside ExB

Alice drags her brother Edward to an art show, intent on introducing him to her friend. Instead, Edward meets an intriguing painter, who takes the exploration of colors to a whole new level. AH and rated M for a reason folks.

Remus Lupin and Sirius Black come from different homes, different backgrounds: one craves love, the other doesn't even know what love is. How will they end up together? SBRL. Slashy smut in later chapters - be warned!

Jasper prefers living the life of a gypsy, traveling from town to town, nothing and no one to tie him down. When he finds himself drawn to Seattle he finds more than he ever expected. This is a SLASH fic, An entry for the 2010 In the Closet Contest.

She dreams of darkness. Lust. Passion. The man she fantasizes about has it all, especially the darkness. The problem is, he's not really a man. Rated M for language & dark themes.

USUK. Arthur is a poet with too many dreams. Alfred is a university student with too much time to kill. Maybe it's chance they end up together, but it will take more than chance to keep them there.

There Will Be Blood contest Readers' Choice 1st Place Winner: Waking up naked in a strange bed is bad. Waking up naked and tied up in a strange bed is worse. Even worse than that? Waking up naked and tied up in the bed of a Vampire that wants to eat you.

Do come into my castle. In here you would find everything you need, love, comfort, warmth and devotion. I just hope you don't try to leave. US/UK

COMPLETE! Student-teacher AU. It's Remus' final year at Hogwarts and he doesn't know what to expect with Prof Black as the new DADA teacher. Voldemort is gaining power, the wizarding world is in dispute, and Remus has no idea where he fits into all of it.

Between dealing with crazy moms, psychotic guardians and a useless entourage, the last thing the rival authors needed was to be locked up together to write a book without killing each other first. Humour. SasuNaru

Bella with some backbone. A cynical smart ass who attracts the attention of the local brooding vampire, Edward Cullen. AU/OOC. Rated M for strong snark and lemons galore. Nominated for three Tomato Soup Awards!

Edward Cullen HAD Bella Swan from the moment they first met. He owned her, everything about her and he threw it all away in a few hours. But now he's back to win her all over again but this time she's not falling. AH, OOC, rated M.

Sometimes all we need is one little push from the right, or perhaps most unlikely, person. AU NaruSasu

It was during the summer, with only the moon as their witness, that they came together. AU

Zuko and Sokka go hunting. But for what? Food or each other?

My second venture into Edward's mind. Like Midnight Sun Continued, all dialogue taken from the series is quoted exactly. The rest is just my overactive imagination. Hope you enjoy!

Bella defied the arrogant Edward. He will not forget her. She will be his sacrifice, he will make her his prisoner, and he will make her his, after all, he is the most feared. He is known as The Black Dragon. All Human. Dark. Medieval

Jasper's computer needs help from an expert. Enter Geekward. A little slashy o/s written for Yogagal's birthday.

Seventh year at Hogwarts. One chance to get with Remus. Sirius is one determined Gryffindor. He was going to seduce his wolf. Warnings: Horrific tongue in cheek, swearing, fluff, smut, silliness and cringe-worthy humor. Sirius/Remus SLASH! COMPLETE!

Every time I roll to try to get up the conviction to kiss him, I always roll a one. A botch. Because kissing my dungeon master - my best friend - my Jasper - would be the definition of a botch." M for citrusy, geeky boy-love. For SorceressCirce's bday

Sasuke's just doing his duty to keep the squatter situation under control. SasuNaru PWP, yaoi

Sequel to "Oops, he did it Again!" Funny One-shots of crazy, hilarious, insanely awesome incidents that all started...with a comment. All Vampire, no Renemesmee, Wolves may show up later.

Funny Takes...making fun of the Twilight MOVIE! HILARIOUS! Seriously....read if you want to laugh.

As crappy as his whole day had been, the 3 AM reunion on a deserted road made it somewhat better. SasuNaruSasu. For LavitaaColori. PWP.

Arthur has spent nights seeking out the most wanted thief in Camelot, but when injured in the crossfire of their capture, he has but little choice to accept help from the very person he sought after. So what happens if the thief steals his heart instead?

Confirmed bachelor and career soldier, Edward Cullen was perfectly happy with his life. Until a young punk busted his windshield. Suddenly, he finds himself drawn to a beautiful widow with a LOT of baggage- four rambunctious sons. AH/AU - COMPLETE

Written for dreaminGemini. Arthur administers a punishment to Merlin that leads to more than they bargained for. Warnings: Public Spanking, Light bondage, Sex. Rated M. PWP/Lemon. One-shot.

In Bella's POV, but in this story she's actually NOT stupid or a total douche canoe. Only read if you dislike Twilight. Or read if you DO like Twilight but aren't too stuffy to have a sense of humor. HA HA, read on, fool.

Naively manipulated into believing his death may be imminent, Naruto starts to enforce his will while he's still alive… much to Sasuke and Sakura's dismay. Slightly AU since Sasuke has returned. Rated for language and lemon SasuSaku

Edward is a sugar addicted seventeen-year old who thinks he is a vampire. He is in love with Charlie Swan, who drives in the town's supply of sugar every week. But when Bella arrives, she decides to destroy their relationship and take Edward for her own.

Sasuke is starting an internship at a medical company, all alone in a new country. His mentor seems to hate him, but is there more to Naruto than it seems? Naruto x Sasuke, yaoi

Bella is in time to save Edward in Volterra, but he doesn't give her chance to explain that they are both alive. Since Edward believes they are in heaven, he takes the opportunity to make the reunion memorable in a way she never dared imagine.

Harry catches Draco by surprise on his birthday; Draco gets himself in trouble; just a few more average moments in the not-so-average relationship of Harry and Draco. Oneshot, slash, heavy BDSM & lots of lemony goodness; full warnings inside.

A sequel to Forget Me Not And Remember Me Soon . How Merlin and Arthur cope the next time round with Merlin's amnesia. Warnings: Reincarnation. Some swear words?

Maybe there really is a glitch in Bella's brain. After all, she knows he's out there. She knows he's been watching her ever since she can remember. She's *not* crazy. Why won't anyone believe her? Dark humor a la Face Punch.

The last thing Sasuke wanted to do for Christmas was be stuck in the middle of nowhere with buckets of snow and an annoying neighbour who won't leave him alone. NaruSasu.

Naruto was everything frowned upon in a pet, and that was the only reason Sasuke even bothered. SasuNaruSasu. Oneshot. Kitsune!Naruto.

Was it that hard to get a good nights sleep? SasuNaruSasu Yaoi, NC17

Merlin's really cold, and Arthur's the one who gets to warm him up! : SLASH! Merlin/Arthur

PWP. Hogwarts-Era. James discovers something about Remus during a prank gone wrong. Pairing: James/Remus, James/Remus/Sirius, Remus/Sirius

OOTP. There are rumors going around.

Things the character would say—if I had anything to say about it.

Bella's the weird chick at school, Edward's the mayor's son. Homecoming brings them together and lands them with a bun in the oven. How will they deal with the pregnancy and their peers? Inspired by Juno.

Winner Slash/Backslash One Shot Contest. Jasper reminisces about his life with Edward, the texture of buttercream, and the capacity to love. AH. Rated M. Explicit sexual content. Additional outtakes will appear at random intervals.

By pretending she is falling for Edward, Bella is fulfilling Esme's dying wish. But sexy, possessive Edward can read her mind. Will she ever get into his? Can Bella forget the pain of her teenage years, and can she resist his relentless seduction? AH.

Andromeda Tonks was at her wits end. There was no way she was going to be beaten by a toddler, even one who did currently have blue hair and green eyes. She was determined to teach her grandson colour theory, the only problem is he's got other ideas.

Edward and Bella get busy with their... adventurous babymaking. Hardcore smut.

SEQUEL TO MLOONAA! Join Bella, Edward, and the gang as they reunite during college for breaks! Fun, Fluff, Lemons, and of course DTE! OOC, AU, and All Human. Please read Making Love Out Of Nothing At All first!

Slash: The night before - drunkenness and an iPhone. The morning after - humiliation, a hangover and...insanely hot fantasies? A crossover appearance by QAF Emmett. Language/explicit sexuality.

Hello. I'm Bella Swan, and i hate men. You didn't really think i'd just be 'dazzled' by you, did you? Oh, honey. I'm smarter than that." A/H AU Definitely OOC.

AU Post-NM. Teacher!Bella, Student!Edward; a struggle of wills, an attempt at seduction, a dark secret, a dash of UST, a gallon of attitude, antagonistic motorcycling, a hell of a lot of angst and one unforgettable scene in a snow storm.

Woah! Why do Bella and Edward have mega-phones? Why is Catherine pulling her hair out? And you know that deer out the start of the movie? Who knew, but he's a DI-VA!

Edward is an English soldier that tortures Scottish people to get military information out of during the 1300's. Bella is a captured Scottish woman with information. What will Edward do to get Bella to speak? An entry for the Age of Edward contest.

Bella isn't your regular government agent. She's a rogue agent, and she's killing everyone that ruined her life. What happens when she takes an FBI agent, Edward Cullen, hostage? Will her revenge still be burned into her mind? AU, AH, OOC.

There ain't no rest for the wicked, until we close our eyes for good. AH, OOC, EPoV.

When Sasuke's given the opportunity to take a business trip with Naruto God's gift to mankind , he concludes that jumping Naruto's bones is top priority. Three-shot gift for YuukoUchiha. SasuNaruSasu

When a beautiful young woman decides to end the misery of her life, Carlisle picks up the pieces and helps her live again. Carlsile X Esme with young Edward in all his sardonic, sarcastic glory as well.

Or, In Which Draco Malfoy gets himself into Trouble, with a capital T. Draco is fantasizing about a certain Gryffindor, and smut ensues. Draco/Harry.

Street kid. Rockstar. Worlds apart and yet so similar. Sometimes fate throws people together for a reason, and sometimes two people that rub each other the wrong way make the best sparks. All Human **WARNING: MOSTLY HUMOR BUT ALSO CONTAINS ANGST & DARK THEMES**

Bill knows just the thing to turn Charlie on. Bill/Charlie, Bill/Harry

What happens when Edward and Jasper have a day off. A series of oneshots about our boys. SLASH. PWP.

Draco muses about his relationship with a certain raven-haired someone. Can he keep his feelings in check? Rated for sexual content and language, SLASH.

When you have one Remus Lupin, a rather horny werewolf, rushing to the dorms to relieve himself of a certain problem, some rather desperate measures will be taken if he's slowed down by a certain dog animagus that's only goal is to turn him on even more.

Hermione is serving at Malfoy Mansion after the war was lost. In her bleak existance, she manages to find ways to cope. Contains nonconsentual. COMPLETE.

Bella swan gets a ride of a life time when Officer Cullen Otherwise known as Officer Yummy Is instructed to take back to forks. Edward is a strict nononsense guy. And the rambunctious Bella may just melt his stone heart. or drive him insane. AU AH RXR EXB

What if something bad was happening in your household, happening right under your nose, but you never even notice it. What happens when it's the person you trust, with your child, who is the one lashing out? Tragedy strikes the Cullen family.

Yes, I know the title is not very creative at all. Sorry, but my brain is dead. Remus comes home one evening to find Sirius talking to a... box? Ok, one of them must be bloddy losing their minds here, and Remus is willing to bet that it isn't himself.

The prep version of My Immortal, by Tara Gilesbie AKA xxxbloodyrists666xxx. So goffik people, no flaming!

A collection of one shots following Kat and Patrick through the ups and downs after high school.

Entry for the Black Balloon Contest. She was a whirlwind and he was the calm. Opposites attract, but staying together is harder than coming together. What happens when someone gets lost in the quiet? All human.

The world has been crippled by a plague that disintegrates both the human body and mind. With a rapidly diminishing human population, two opposing leaders rush to find the cure and the answer, to the virus and themselves. SasuNaru, zombie AU

Everyone went into it thinking that they held all the cards and could control the game. And then things changed again, and again, and again. Whose gamble is going to pay off big-time when all the cards are down? ItaNaru

Remus has a rather eventful dream, and decides to tell Sirius about it. RL/SB slash.

How is it that two canines can realize their love each other, but their human counter parts remain ignorant? Sirius/Remus. Short, fluffy, and sweet.

Challenge drabbles. "We made a mistake Daddy." - Latest drabble. A series of 100 word drabbles using word prompts. Includes ships such as EdwardBella, SamLeah, and KateGarrett. Spoilers from BD.

This is a collection of random times at the Volturi castle... prepare to laugh, cry, and be disturbed. Please R&R

She's exhausted out of her mind thanks to Jace who just wont give her a break off training. Oh, he feels guilty, alright. So he gives her a little massage to loosen up her sore muscles. Which of course, led to something much, much more.Smut in chap. 2.

Bella feels angry and sad that her parents are filing for a divorce. She then meets Edward who is giving out free hugs. All Human. Oneshot. Review!

2nd Place Mentalward o/s contest. It was heaven and hell all at once, because I knew no one else would ever satisfy me the same way, but I didn’t know if the monster would let me keep her. B/E. A/H. Drama, angst, maybe horror.

Guaranteed to make you laugh!

People say that snuff is an urban legend. Death created on film, for entertainment - they say it doesn't exist. They're wrong. They're just not looking hard enough. That, and they don't know Edward Masen. Mentalward Contest entry. VERY DARK. AH

One-shot. Contest Entry for "The Most Shitteous Craptastic Cuddlecock Crack Contest 2009". I vomited a little as I wrote this. Seriously.

Jace's POV. To the tune of "Paparazzi" by Lady Gaga.

When life gives you a slightly crazed angel with a thirst for blood, what do you do? You bury the evidence in the backyard. AU. Rated for violence, gore, and sexual content. My entry for the Mentalward Contest.

Entry for The Slash Backslash One-Shot contest. Two guys, two cigarettes..one alley, one night. Will Jasper find what he's looking for? SLASH WARNING duh! If you're under 18, go play in the kiddie pool - this water is over your head. JxE AH

Three friends. Three guys. In the same body. Blood-thirsty murderers, prowling the streets of Chicago, one at a time. "Evil prowls the shadows in this city at night Miss Swan. You will be wise to avoid it...not ask to see it again.”one-shot. RATED MA

Twenty-five unrelated one-shots/drabbles based on one-word prompts for Round One of the Twilight 25.

Entry for the Most Craptastic Story contest. The Twilight Saga, done completely in LOLspeak.

It was written law in Revolutionary France, "Should a man be convicted of a crime and sentenced to hang, he may be saved by a virtuous maiden who agrees to marry him." E/B, AU, AH

I spoofed the movie a little, I love the movie, but I was bored and this came to mind, so please R&R

O/S written for the Slash Backslash Contest. Does fate actually exist? Is there a reason for everything? Edward is in the middle of finding his true self. Does he find it with Jasper? Lots of slashy, detailed smut. Don't read if you don't like that stuff.

He is infamous. Everyone knows about the terrorizing murderer who leaves behind bloody scenes and corpses at night while everyone sleeps. Bella, a journalist, investigates and finds her fear turning dangerously into love. One-Shot: Tattward&InkellaContest

Masen and Swan help the New Orleans PD investigate a series of unusual killings involving voodoo and red-haired men. Things get a little sticky when Masen goes undercover, and it's not because of the humidity. Collaboration by Gleena and ebhg.

I licked my lips in anticipation, my mouth curving into a smirk as I reveled in her fear. Like a cat with a fat mouse, I reveled in my prey’s fear and she had just become my new toy." Darkward Vamp Entry AU, Mrated for a reason

Slash: "The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference." - Elie Wiesel. Sexuality/language/mature themes.

For the Kid Contest. AH. Join Emmett, Rosalie, Jasper, Alice, Edward, and Bella as they watch Dora the Explorer, commit "suicide", and explore Alice's closet. Snippets of my other story Best Friends. Good for a quick laugh.

It's not Naruto's job to save souls. It would take more than a few rules to stop him from trying, though. AU, yaoi

Bella is forced to spend the Halloween Night babysitting alone, but things quickly go from mundane to terrifying as the night progresses. Collaboration between Risbee and Coldplaywhore. For Twilight Fright Night Contest. Rated M for Language and Lemon.

The infamous My Immortal ended. The truth is revealed.

When the Cullens move to Forks, Bella thinks that the creepy new kid, Edward, has freaky yellow eyes. And that he's insufferably rude. Good thing he's in love with someone else. An AU dark comedy.

BEST DRY HUMP IN THE SLASH BACKSLASH COMPETITION. Carlisle adopted Edward at seventeen, seeing something in him that caught his attention. But, what if he got his perspective wrong? What if Edward was meant to be something more to him? More than a son?

TWILIGHT ON CRACK, BABY! A parody of Twilight in which Bella is a suicidal emo kid and Edward is a preppy, acts-like-he's-gay kid. Basically everyone is opposite. Funniest thing ever. Please read and review! will be multi-chapter. AU

Naruto is sick and tired of his noisy neighbors upstairs, so he decides he and Sasuke should make some noise of their own. CRACK, SasuNaruSasu, hard yaoi.

Everyone is daring each other to do stupid things. Bella dares Emmett to yell at Newton for cheating on him. Just stupid crazy dares. All human. Warning: You will laugh at least once. Sucks at making summary.

Bella arrives at Jacob's doorstep to tell him three little words. One-shot, what I think should have happened, YEAH. GO AHEAD, FLAME! Lisa: You are so pathetic. Me: Oh, and you're not. Lisa: ...Touche. T for one little cuss word. TEAM EDWARD!

Sleep; the natural periodic suspension of consciousness during which the powers of the body are restored and for humans, regular sleep is essential for survival. However, for Itachi, the simple act of falling asleep can turn deadly. AU ItaXNaru

One-Shot Hermione is stuck at the airport waiting for a flight to London to see Harry and Ginny have their first child. While there, she runs into someone unexpected. OOC

Takes place after NM, E and B are preparing for college, when Alice starts having visions of E becoming human. However,when this happens, B finds herself in a situation in which she has to protect him.Will their relationship finally reach Equilibrium?

Companions of the Night by Vivian Vande Velde. Always wanted to know what he was thinking...After she left, he realized this woman was her all. What can he do to turn this human into one of his own...into an ETERNAL companion of the night?

Crackpoem about Edward deciding to become a pirate, thus ostracizing himself from all other vampires. Sadly the pirate's don't want to know him either. Will he always be an outcast? E/B

Remus learns that size does matter. Pre slash. Pre romance. Read the warnings.

A new girl--not Bella--comes and knows Edward's secret. Moreover, she thinks he's gay! It's a one shot of a human messing with Edward.

Charlie starts to question why Edward doesn't eat. He comes to one conclusion: Edward is bulimic?

Older darker dominant corporate Edward, hires privet investigator Jacob Black to follow his younger girlfriend, Bella around when she’s acting suspicious. Lemons, a dramatic thriller. Rated M.OCC/AU/AH

Um. Hi. I don’t really know how to say this, but I have your kids with me, and I was thinking maybe you would like them back. So yeah… call me.

I went about this in the same way Stephenie Meyer had started Midnight Sun. All the dialog originally from Bella's POV is directly quoted from Twilight. This is Edward's POV, picking up where she left off, midway through chapter 11.

When Renesmee returns home from a shopping trip with a Caboodle of hair accessories, Daddy is her preferred makeover subject. Charlie's recent words on fatherhood convince Edward to take it like a man and allow his daughter some fun at his expense.

realy funny... found most on this sight... i chasnged some up so there were no curses and btw all the twilight ones aplly to me!

Special Agent Bella Swan, the FBI’s most unwanted, is partnered with the bureau’s poster boy, SA Edward Masen. Their chemistry keeps them on their toes as they travel to Forks to investigate a series of mysterious deaths. Epic T Collaboration Gleena/ebhg

When he’s left at the Alter, Will flees Port Royal in search of reprieve from the pain. He finds his comfort and salvation on the deck of the Black Pearl and the arms of its captain. Set after first movie, AU from movies 2 and 3 Jack/Will slash. Onesho.

Edward and Bella take Renesmee to Seattle for a day trip six months after Breaking Dawn. Fluff, fluff and fluff. This is a stand-alone outtake from my story Bonding with Daddy. Written for Father's Day.

This is from LJ Meents. BxE written by Edward Oneshot Sort of funny Read and review! I suck at summaries...

you'll laugh so hard when reading it. I know I did. A little morbid.

Ever wonder how many times Edward is described? Want to know a list of "That's what she said"? Bored, lifeless, or just want to laugh about all things Twilight? Written out of LOVE.

Edward thought of Bella as just a friend, but Bella always felt more.That was 3 years ago and now she's ready to make Edward Cullen fall in love with her and make this the best summer of her life. All Human OOC Lemons Gall-lore! WARNING: NC-17

100 reasons Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks are cooler than Edward Cullen/Isabella Swan. People are going to hate me... Please read and flame! Edited.

Titly says it all but if you love to laugh and see a new version of the film's scene then please read. If you love pure crap, please read. If you dont want to laugh then dont read. That is all

All human! Bella is aspiring towards her dream job but when a family crisis hits her, she has to adapt. This means getting a job as a babysitter for a cute little kid. Except there's one little snag: the kid's brother, Edward Cullen. BxE R&R

What if Edward Cullen was real? Edward takes a shower. Someone is watching him. Who? It’s YOU ! Would you just stand and watch? Could you resist temptation? Read to find out.. AU where Bella doesn't exist Rated M . LEMONS

He's the pretty boy, she's the brainy girl. It all started with a missing book to lead to an unexpected development of events; “I’m assuming this note came from the book thief?” - AU

Nobody will explain to Renesmee what exactly it means for Jacob to have imprinted on her, so she decides to look it up in the dictionary with hilarious results.

A collab between Kitschisme and Rosette-cullen Isabella Swan has lived as a servant her entire life. She has come to expect cruelty from her masters, but will her luck change when she is purchased by the mysterious, brooding millionaire Edward Cullen?

On Friday the 13th, what do you get when you cross a sexy henge with two parties, sake, a full moon, and the hottest Jounin in Konoha? Read to find out. KakaIru.

Angela teaches Bella some new cute ways to show affection and Bella can't wait to try them on Edward. BxE, one-shot and pure fluff!

This is the worst fanfic ever. Inspired by a really bad fanfic I read. Bella, who grows up in an enchilada farm, meets the notorious gangsta, E Cullen. Enter Nessie, the Loch Ness Monster. What happens next? No lemons, just humor. R&R :D

Funny fanfic telling what you SHOULDN'T do in Twilight fanfiction... Includes JacobXBella, EmmettXBella, and my personal fave: BananasXBella! New chapters include The Movie, Yum Lemons, and 2008. Curing Twilight fanfiction, one parody at a time.

AU. vampires have enslaved humans. Edward comes to the Center to get his first human and finds Bella, immune to his mind reading and rebellious. He takes her, planning to learn more about her strange behavior. Full Summery inside. ExB JxA COMPLETE

Bella and Edward watch a movie. Pure fluff. One-shot.

NC-17 One-Shot! Bella, being engrossed in a happily fulfilling, if conventional relationship, returns home one evening to find a side of Edward she's never seen before... a side we like to call: Domward. Written solely for my bb antiaol. NC-17/MA

If you are a Twilight fan who wants to break-up with her boyfriend, this is how it's done. Team Jacob and Team Edward installments!

LxLight. Death Note with a Disney spin. Maybe their poison drenched love, this twisted fairytale of most wicked beauty, is all that matters, even when L is dragged back from his grave and faced with his poisoned apple again. Cowritten with Narroch.

Edward, Nessie and Jacob are left alone one morning as everyone else is out. Nessie wants a piano lesson and Jacob wonders how Edward handles his gift. Post Breaking Dawn Edward bonds with Jake/Nessie.

Naruto spun in a circle and tried desperately to understand where he was. What if the difference between life and death, heaven and hell, and this life and the next, rested on the shoulders of a person he’d never met. At least not this time. SasuNaru

One thing hotter than a man in uniform? Well hell, I think TWO men WITHOUT uniform kinda takes the cake. SasuNaru, lemon, oneshot.

For every good book out there, there should be at least a couple hundred parodies for it. Well, this parody is here to make it 'hundred and one. :D From ch. one, "First Sight" to the epilogue, "An Occasion". I hope to make you laugh! :D R&R!

Jealousy is a glutton when it to comes to vampires. OOC lemon one-shot ExB

For Jayeliwood's Sexy Eddie Contest. After a horrible dinner Edward helps Bella forget all about it. BXE Lemon

Sick of overly cliched Twilight fics? Well, here's your chance to laugh at exactly how stupid they are! A new cliche whenever I can! Now featuring cliches written by our readers! I do love being cruel... T for some swearing. And remember to hate on Jake!

Riddles are always fun, but what happens when the jokes relate to vampires? Fluff of course! Pre-Breaking Dawn.

And to think, Naruto had once considered arrest to be a bad thing... SasukexNaruto. Lime. One-shot.

L didn't have a real name and he finds his immunity to the Death Note tragic. Light joins him on his journey of self discovery when Interpol joins the task force in finding Kira. The battle of the wits between detective and suspect isn't over. Yaoi

Edward takes Bella to a teashop and her tea is too hot. What will Edward do to help her? What will Jacob do? One-shot. Ha, I suck at summaries. Just R&R.

No, what scared me the most was their laugh. They seriously sounded like a bunch of little kids, who just breathed in 5 liters of helium each, and then smoked crack. It was scary.

It's exactly how it sounds.

Carlisle has had it with the children's constant bickering so he sends the Cullen's to family therapy. Suicidal Edward,Bella's fear of committment, Alice addicted to shopping, Rosalie's hostility, Emmett and Japer's gambling..who will survive? FUNNY

You are Uchiha Sasuke, its time you teach the class everything you know about the very special 'uke'. Chap 2: You are Uzumaki Naruto, its time you helped save your kind, the uke, and warn them about the evil 'seme'. Yaoi and such.

The Twilight game. Enthusiasm is not shared by all however. R&R

Just a one-shot for laughs, see what happens when Edward makes fun of Jaasper's hair. Please RxR, Thanks!

It's always good to be welcomed home. SLASH HPDM

This is the first in my Twilight commercals series. It is Bella's 18th birthday...but something is bothering Edward. Edward'sPOV. This is a bad summary. Just read it. It's fun! oneshot

One night, while checking in on Harry, Remus overhears something startling. Harry is embarrassed, of course, but that doesn't compare to what he discovers later that night! SLASH, NC17. SR, SiriusRemus. Slightly PWP.

Edward is given a 30 dollar spending limit for Bella's Christmas present... but will he abide by the rules or find a loophole? FLUFF! One Shot.

Edward's rebellious years. 19271931 A collection of oneshots.

I return every year to watch the peonies bloom. Bella planted them to remind me of our love. “Because you won’t change me, and someday I’m going to die.” It's been twenty years since I left. Did she have the happy human life I wanted for her? AU E/B

How can Bella make Charlie understand why she welcomed Edward back?

[Pun fully intended] Jacob has a master plan to be rid of Edward. Edward just wants Jacob to go away...

Exactly how do the Cullens tease Edward before he goes to watch Bella sleep? Comes before Her Worst Nightmare.

Post New Moon Edward angst. Charlie arrives while Edward and Bella are watching a movie. Bella has fallen asleep in Edward's lap.

Thrown together in a moment of downtime at the Yule Ball, Hermione shares a brief conversation with Cedric Diggory, and Cedric offers a bit of advice about Ron.