19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

Akatsukicons:

Deidara: O_\/

Itachi: o/_\o

Hidan: * - *

Kakuzu; $_$

Pein: - : : -

Tobi: ((@))))

Kisame: =0_0=

Sasori : -_-

Zetsu: ( (o_O) )

Konan: /-_-\\\\*/

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Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. But walk beside me and I shall be your friend.

You can't remain young forever, but you can be immature for as long as you like. I intend to exploit that fact.

If you're absent during my struggle, don't expect to be present during my success. - Will Smith.

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move.

I do not fear death; I fear the transition.

Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it.

Those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it.

"For there to be a happy ending, there must first be a story."

"Love breeds from hate."

"They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."

"A fool flatters himself, a wise man flatters the fool." -Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton

"It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not." -André Gide

"The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept." -George Carlin

"One person's craziness is another person's reality." -Tim Burton

"Like a wild animal, the truth is too powerful to remain caged." - The Candor Manifesto

“To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.”

If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in 'mother in law', they come out to 'Woman Hitler'?

Smile. It confuses people.

If the world gives you lemons, you can make lemonade... or you can make a biologically engineered virulent air-born pathogenic virus that will wipe out the entire population of the planet, which would be a whole lot cooler.

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

"We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do."

"An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough."

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

There is nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and lose, that's weird.

If you realised at Akatsuki members usually get defeated after they rip off their cloaks, copy and paste this onto your profile.

A wise man once said: "I don't know, go ask a woman."

Warning: Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.

Be the type of woman, that when your feet touch the floor when you get out of bed in the morning the Devil thinks: "Oh, crud! She's up!"

Note to self: It is illegal to stab people for being stupid.

Don't upset me, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

When someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but it only takes 4 to extend your arm and whack them upside the head.

Everyday I think people can't get any dumber. Everyday I'm proven horribly wrong.

I don't need your attitude, I have my own.

I did not hit you, I just high-fived your face.

You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.

Don't make me mad... I'm known to bite at random!

When you cry, I cry. When you laugh, I laugh. When you jump off a bridge, I laugh harder.

Don't you dare tell me the sky is the limit when there are footsteps on the moon.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then you'll be a mile away from them and you'll have their shoes.

Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

When life gives you lemons make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how the heck you did it.

Some people are like slinkies. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

If anyone is looking for "A Groupchat Fic" - you can find it on my AO3 account where it's still up. Please DM me for it!