ATTENTION DUELISTS!

MY HAIR GIVES ME SUPER PLOT WRITING SHENANIGANS!

MY VOICE LETS ME DEFY SLEEP!

MWAHAHAHAHA!

If you're looking for an update to any stories I have here... well, you should probably just head over to Spacebattles at this point. Username over there is also Sagely Hijinks.

(Arguably) Important: The Compiled Book Of The Log

For everyone who reads Harry Potter fanfiction:

Excerpt from Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, page 289;

"Quirrell snapped his fingers. Ropes sprang out of thin air and wrapped themselves tightly around Harry."

This is a cannon example of wordless, wand-less magic being used. There are many more throughout the books. If, for some reason, you doubt that Dumbledore needs a wand to do magic, then, uh, why are you writing?

Like honestly. Wandless magic is probably nowhere near as special as some people make it out to be.

Other Usernames on Other Sites:

Spacebattles: Sager Hijinks

Some people put funny quotes from movies/etc. on their profiles. I've taken some that I like.

“Attempted murder? Now honestly, what is that? Do they give a Nobel prize for attempted chemistry? Do they?"

"The object of war is not to die for your country, it's to make the other bastard die for his."

"If at first you don't succeed, deny that you were really trying in the first place."

"I've got half a mind to kill you, and the other half agrees."

"We are not retreating -- We are advancing in another direction."

"Fruit don't talk... Fruit just listens... and waits."

"I've taken a vow of poverty. To annoy me, send money."

"My plans always work! ...Sometimes!"

A Useful Guide to Japanese Suffixes and Naming:

by yours truly

1. First vs. Last names.

In Japan, people are named with their family name - their last name - first. For example, "Abigail Bailey" would be introduced in Japan as "Bailey Abigail". Most acquaintances address each other by their last names, and using someone's first name denotes a level of closeness and/or familiarity. Close friends (same-gender) would probably address each other with their first names.

2. List of Suffixes and Their Meanings

If you insist on using these, at least use them right.

"-kun" (pronounced 'koon'):
1. A diminutive, basically for calling someone a kid or a child. Usually used for boys, but is used on occasion for young girls too.
2. An endearment used for a guy. For example, Sakura called Sasuke "Sasuke-kun". Denotes a relationship.
*Special* - Can be used to insult someone (cause you're calling them a kid). A villain might insult the main character buy adding a "-kun" to his/her name.
*Special* - In very close relationships (read: marriage and such), a suffix such as this is unnecessary. Both parties know of each other's affection, so suffixes such as this aren't needed.

"-chan" (pronounced 'chahn'):
1. Basically the female version of "-kun". Usually used for young girls, occasionally used for young boys, too.
2. An endearment for a girl. For example, Naruto called Sakura "Sakura-chan". Denotes a relationship.
*Special* - Same as "-kun"

"-san" (pronounced 'sahn'):
1. Unisex suffix to show respect. Used for peers, generally. Can be formal, or can be casual.
2. In Japan, people are very respectful. Some (not all) will use "san".

"-sama" (pronounced 'sah-mah'):
1. Unisex suffix to show great respect. Might be used for kings, feudal lords, Kages, clan heads, etc.

"-dono" (pronounced 'doh-noh'):
1. Unisex suffix to show great respect, but among peers. Might be used between the Hokage and Kazekage, or two Shoguns, two kings, etc.

Japanese is cool:
An interesting thing is that you can shove just about any word after a name and treat it like a subject. For example, the following are all nouns which can be stuck at the end of a name to represent you think of that person as an example of that noun.

"-sensei" (pronounced 'sehn-say'): Means teacher.

"-baka" (pronounced 'bah-kah): Means idiot.

"-teme" (pronouced 'teh-may'): Means bastard.

"-sennin" (pronounced 'seh-nihn'): Means sage.

Example - I could say "Kakashi-sensei" or "Kakashi is my sensei".

No Suffix:
1. Again, implies a level of closeness. Family members generally don't use suffixes when using each other's given names. Kirito calls Suguha just that - Suguha.
2. Also used among close friends.

3. Pronouns that Shall Not Go Unmodified! (Except for when they do.)

"Nii-_" (pronounced 'nee'):
1. Means "brother". Generally a little childish, usually (almost always) followed by a "-san"
*Special* - Young children, if they meet and befriend an older guy (think: a teen getting an 8 year old's ball from a tree), they might refer to that guy as "Nii-san".

"Onii-_" (pronounced 'oh-nee'):
1. Means "older brother". More formal than "Nii". Can be used to differentiate between two older brothers; 1 is Nii-san and the older older brother is Onii-san.
2. Frequently followed by "san" and "sama". Generally, a sister of appropriate age referring to her older brother as "Onii-sama" means that she has a crush on him, because that's a thing in Japan.

"Nee-_" (pronounced 'neh'):
1. Basically a female "Nii", it means "Sister". Can be followed by a "-san" or a "-chan"
*Special* - Can be used for nuns, or as they are known, "Sisters"

"Onee-_" (pronounced 'oh-neh'):
1. Basically a female "Onii", with a few differences. Means "older sister". Can be followed by "chan", "san", or "sama".
2. "Onee-sama" denotes a level of formality along with the acknowledgement of a higher position. No romantic connotations (usually).

4. Important Disclaimer

Literally none of this is a hard science. All of this is dependent on the people involved. Very formal people might refer to people as "san" after knowing them for years, and super informal people may use "kun" and "chan" after ten minutes. Midoriya, from My Hero Academia, refers to almost all the guys he meets as "kun", and it's not a diminutive coming from him. Except that it's not impossible someone could take it as an insult and complain to him about it. Oh, and he also calls Bakugou "Kacchan" because his name is Katsuki, and so he shortened Katsuki-chan to Kacchan and never stopped using that name.

It's, like, totally subjective and dependent on the people involved, the context, the intricacies of their relationship, the people that are around them, and how they feel that day. Except sometimes it doesn't. And so in conclusion, unless you're, like, actually Japanese and have a real understanding of how to use these things, don't bother.

Happy writing!