High Pot In Noose
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Joined 08-25-11, id: 3195987, Profile Updated: 07-12-18
Author has written 12 stories for Harry Potter, Twilight, Lord of the Rings, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Addams Family, and Sherlock.

I'm now on ko-fi! If you want to support me, go to ko-fi!com/vjkendall

Hey, I'm Val! I'm a stickler for spelling, punctuation, and all those other hoity-toity things. I like the smell of honeysuckle and jack-fruit; the squishy feel of sinking into sand; blowing bubbles; the smell of burning paper; and hedgehog-shaped pencil-sharpeners.

If I review your story, it will to praise you or give constructive criticism, because I don't believe in writing negative reviews. I will tell you if you need to separate your paragraphs better, but I will NOT tell you if I think your plot points suck, because that is a personal opinion, not a fact; I will keep my personal opinions where they belong: in my own work. If you want an opinion from me about something you've written, PM me.

I'm the sort of person that loves a thing and ends up trying to make it better; this is why I do fanfiction, I love the original story so much, I'll sit and think of all the ways it could be made even more interesting to me. I do this for fanfics by other authors as well, though I keep those mostly to myself. I don't appreciate being accused of plagiarism, especially when I have it clearly stated that my stories are based off other fics and WILL contain recognizable content. It's stated clearly in the summaries and the disclaimers as well; it is NOT my fault if you are apparently too illiterate to even understand a story blurb.

Considering none of the authors of the stories I've fic'ed have come screaming at me, I don't know why anyone else would do so. I've messaged them for permission, but it seems neither of them have anything to do with anymore, and they haven't told me no. Neither have been active in years. If they ever come back and tell me to take down what I have up, I will, but none of YOU have the right to make any demands of me.

"Why do you make Harry a girl if you won't put her in a relationship?"

It's all about practical experience. I'm a girl -- I know how a girl might think and behave. The beauty of Rowling's characterization of Harry Potter is that he could easily be turned into a girl with only a few small changes, changes that don't interfere with his intrinsic quintessence. The only parts where Harry's distinctly male is when he's dealing with crushes on girls, and even then it's like he's just going through the motions -- he could easily homosexual or bisexual and just unknowing. (Being oblivious is one of those things that make Harry Harry.) Because I prefer writing from a female point of view, Harry changes into a girl for the sake of my convenience.

Unless my story starts out with him initially being a boy, Harry (or any other MC) being a girl is not a plot device. I don't want to get any more comments telling me that unless I stick Harry with a guy or have her do something exclusively female, my making Harry a girl is pointless. How many stories are out there with Harry having his name changed to something like Hadrian, or more lordships than he has fingers and toes to count on and the story has nothing to do with those things? Don't give me any crap just because I don't cling to gender-identity.

MARCH 9 2016 NOTICE

So, I figured out what the hell was wrong with my computer that it refused to save any document files. It turned out that on top of a virus, my flash-drive was on the blink. My expensive new 62 GB flash-drive with my entire library of ebooks, sheet music, and other important files on it.

I cried. I cried damn hard and had to watch Youtube videos well through the night and into the next morning to calm down properly. Several thousands of dollars of books accumulated over four years, months of effort put into arranging sheet music, countless weeks of work put into creating lesson plans, worksheets, and Powerpoints, all just gone. Unfinished chapters, ideas, research, and outlines for fanfics as well.

My current fics; my future fics; all that time I spent on researching and brainstorming: Gone . . .

I'm back on my feet now, so to speak, but I contemplated just throwing in the towel on it all for a while. Thankfully, I write more for my own pleasure than I do for others, so that line of thought was soon abandoned. Several days on and off of playing melodramatic music on my viola got the depression out of my system. I now have backup drives, cloud storages, and external hard-drives coming out of my ass, so I feel rather confident in saying that this will never happen again.

As of right now, all my fics aside from Godling Ascending are on official hiatus. I currently don't have the time and energy to devote to more than one story at a time.

SEPTEMBER 27 2017 NOTICE

Just returned from Taiwan and I'm on my way to Vietnam instead.

I feel like I somehow have gotten even busier since the last time I've updated my profile announcements. My writing speed is definitely dragging and I feel like my discouragement at being so slow is making it worse as well. Also, my attention is wavering again.

God, I wish I was better at multi-focusing, but I've recently been re-drawn into divination and music by some friends and now time I should be researching and writing is spent on tarot cards and ukulele. God help us all if I slide back into manga as well 'cause I once abandoned my favorite MMORPG for 4 years because I had been introduced to shounen-ai/yaoi/BL, and I didn't resurface until aforementioned MMORPG had long been taken down by its administrators.

I don't want that to happen to my fics -- they deserve better than that and so do my readers. Maybe I should write a book -- with income from a book, I wouldn't have to work as many jobs . . .

If I write a book, would any of you buy it? A book of short stories and poetry and stuff, maybe with riddles, uncommon nursery rhymes, and teaching verses too . . . I dunno, my abilities are eclectic and don't really mesh well together. Shall I make a general children's anthology with ESL potential? Should I make kiddy books about gardening and being eco-friendly? Should I put together a collection of epic poetry for all ages? Should I re-edit one of my fics into an independent story a la the way of Fifty Shades of Gray?

Sigh

I guess whatever will happen will happen.

The next chapter of Godling Ascending is coming, it's just got to be squeezed out between my work and other distractions.

MAY 6 2018 NOTICE

By the time I post this, I’ll have moved again, this time back to my family’s property, where I’ll be living in my fourth maternal aunt’s unused house until I can get my shit together. The moving (something I seem to be always in the middle of doing) is one of the RL things that keep my update-pace so sluggish. I genuinely do feel bad for being so crappy at this updating thing (especially when I follow some writers that consistently update, like, once a week), but I just can’t see it improving any time soon. I should have known better than to start a long-term, multi-chaptered fic like this, but here we are.

If you’re reading this, then you’re either irritated enough with my inconsistency to demand a full explanation or you’re nosy and just want to know what’s happening in my life. Or maybe you just like reading what I write even when it’s just me rambling and ranting.

Anyway, I began writing Godling Ascending in . . . February of 2015. (Frick-frack, I’ve really been dragging my feet, haven’t I?) I started it when I was still keeping house for my mum and doing her lesson plans and teaching material for her English classes, so I had plenty of time to devote to writing. But then I got enlisted into teaching as well when a family friend who worked at a hotel said they needed instructors to improve their staff’s English, and then most of my focus went into keeping up with that. And then I ended up doing weekend tutoring elsewhere too. And then I took up another student that needed to be proficient in reading, writing, and conversation within a year’s time starting from the ground-up.

My contracts with those groups eventually ended (and thank all the gods), but then a friend hired me on to get her a visa to America. Okay, no big deal, I’m familiar with the visa system and know how to make it happen, no problem. But then she flopped her initial interview (ei. She went dressed like what you’d expect when you hear ‘Thai massage therapist’ and acted like her usual abrasive self despite me telling her to put on a respectable front) and she got the brush-off with the polite excuse that she was missing something in her paperwork, so then I had to stay up in Chiang Mai for another month so I could restart the process. That was a month filled with paperwork and more paperwork, no time to stop for lunch some days, never mind writing fanfiction.

After that fiasco was dealt with, I had to move to a new area because when I was living before was too far away from the place I’d be working. Where’s that, you ask? An eco-education park, where I’d be some strange amalgamation of eco-instructor, event-coordinator, head techie, and English teacher again. The job wasn’t labor-intensive most of the time (outside of the occasions where I had to supervise over soon-to-be-released convicts and teach them how to subsist off the land) but there was just a lot going on at all times. I was eventually sent out to some other countries to see if we could open a market for the eco-friendly products produced by local farmers in our organization, but I’m an introverted person and I really don’t like working with people no matter how good the cause is, so I’d had enough after that, and I moved yet again after finding work elsewhere.

So finally we’ve reached the last quarter of 2017. I was teaching English again, but this time as an actual school teacher, and I don’t know what the Hell I was thinking when I agreed to it but I taught three year-levels and a total of nine specific . . . sub-categories? Well, whatever.

It wouldn’t have been so bad, but the school’s new and they still didn’t have all the textbooks they needed, so yet again I had to come up with material to teach on my own, and I don’t think you can fully understand how soul-rending and panic-inducing teaching can be until you’ve show up on your first day on the job only to find out that nobody knows what the Hartford-Hereford-and-Hampshire they’re doing, that no one gives a Frigg that they’re filing system belongs in a horror film, that you have to create the entire curriculum yourself, and that you have ten minutes until your first class starts.

Long story short, I was over-qualified for that travesty of a position, they tried to force me to resign after the principal’s new side-dish wanted the job, and now I’m suing them for violation of contract, withholding my pay, and then docking my pay by 3,000 baht (approx. 100 dollars) on the grounds that I missed six days of work with no notice after New Year when it was them that told me to stop coming in after December.

As you can figure out for yourselves, I haven’t had much time for writing in the in-between.

I really want to be optimistic though. Apart from my fanfic writing that will be picking up, I’m hoping to get some books published, books for the ESL demographic, some children books that I’ve written myself or will be illustrating, and some poetry anthologies. Believe it or not, I’d consider myself more of a poet than an author — I’m better with short and descriptive slices of thought and fancies than proper book-writing. I’ll never give up writing fanfiction (it’s a guilty pleasure) but I think I’ll be spreading out my reach soon.

So, if you’re interested, I hope to have at least two or three poetry anthologies available for sale soon. They won’t be expensive — five dollars at most — and you could think about it like supporting me on Pa!treon something.

Speaking of Pa!treon, I now have a ko-fi account:ko-fi!com(/)vjkendall (with standard web-address of course). It doesn’t have a reward system like other funding sites, but I like the thought of doing exclusive one-shots for supporters or something similar. IDK. If you have ideas or suggestions for this, hit me up.

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Lily and the Art of Being Sisyphus by The Carnivorous Muffin reviews
As the unwitting personification of Death, reality exists to Lily through the veil of a backstage curtain, a transient stage show performed by actors who take their roles only too seriously. But as the Girl-Who-Lived, Lily's role to play is the most important of all, and come hell or high water play it she will, regardless of how awful Wizard Lenin seems to think she is at her job.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 73 - Words: 438,017 - Reviews: 4924 - Favs: 6,407 - Follows: 6,389 - Updated: 7/8 - Published: 12/8/2013 - [Harry P., Tom R. Jr.]
Harriet Potter and the Meddling of The Fates by ItCouldAllBeForNothingTommorow reviews
It wasn't until she was eleven that Harriet Potter learned magic was real. It will be years more before she'll learn that she is more than a witch. Daughter of Loki Harriet's heritage is a mix of three races. A witch, a Jotunn, and a goddess all, her blood is special. Voldemort has no idea what he's getting himself into using this particular enemy's blood for his resurrection.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Avengers - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 37 - Words: 287,898 - Reviews: 537 - Favs: 1,696 - Follows: 2,064 - Updated: 5/26 - Published: 9/27/2018 - Harry P., Voldemort
The Wrath of a Woman Scorned by EDelta88 reviews
A Hidden Village is not a safe place for a little girl if nobody comes when she screams. One night the villagers went too far and now Konoha shall reap what it has sown. Dark!Fem!Naru Pairings: Decided but secret
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 13 - Words: 48,026 - Reviews: 982 - Favs: 3,280 - Follows: 3,539 - Updated: 11/12/2019 - Published: 10/21/2009 - Naruko U.
Run by Foxtronic reviews
Skull has had enough. He's done. He's over this. He's a fucking Cloud, goddamn it. It's time he started acting like one.
Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 34,601 - Reviews: 221 - Favs: 1,674 - Follows: 1,730 - Updated: 5/18/2019 - Published: 2/4/2018 - [Skull, Adult Reborn] Reborn, Arcobaleno
The Merging by Shaydrall reviews
To Harry Potter, Fifth Year seemed like the same as any other. Classmates, homework, new dangers, Voldemort risen in the shadows… the usual, even with a Dementor attack kicking things off. But how long can he maintain the illusion that everything is under control? As hope for a normal life slips away through his fingers, will Harry bear the weight of it all... or will it crush him?
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 395,637 - Reviews: 4542 - Favs: 10,578 - Follows: 12,441 - Updated: 10/27/2018 - Published: 9/27/2013 - Harry P.
Death of Today by Epic Solemnity reviews
COMPLETE LV/HP: Raised in a Muggle orphanage, Harry arrives at Hogwarts a bitter boy. Unusually intelligent, he's recruited by the Unspeakables and the Death Eaters at a young age. As he grows older, he constantly has to struggle to keep his footing around a manipulative and bored Dark Lord, who fancies mind games and intellectual entertainment.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Suspense/Adventure - Chapters: 71 - Words: 500,882 - Reviews: 8429 - Favs: 9,947 - Follows: 5,042 - Updated: 7/2/2018 - Published: 9/26/2009 - [Voldemort, Harry P.] Lily Evans P., Lucius M. - Complete
Drifting by AlphaDelta1001 reviews
Naruto is many things; troublesome, wild, unpredictable, adventurous, untamable, unique. But there's a benefit to being wild and unpredictable; no one has the faintest idea what you're going to do next. NarutoHarem
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Romance - Chapters: 52 - Words: 1,101,134 - Reviews: 6344 - Favs: 9,547 - Follows: 8,538 - Updated: 2/16/2018 - Published: 12/25/2012 - Naruto U.
single hobbits (put a crown on it) by zedille reviews
After the BotFA, Blueberry Baggins, engaged to Thorin and preparing for the wedding, tries to figure out what her married name will be as Queen Under the Mountain, so she can buy more monogrammed spoons. Take that, Lobelia. (Genderswap, everybody lives AU, meta crackfic)
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,992 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 10 - Published: 12/28/2017 - [Bilbo B., Thorin] [Kíli, Tauriel] - Complete
Blurring Reality by Terrific Lunacy reviews
Tom Riddle, top student of the prestigious Hogwarts School for Dance. Albus Dumbledore, searching for the hero in his famous end of year performance by holding open auditions. Harry Potter, attending said auditions only to listen to the live music for free. Severus Snape, dance instructor, tolerating nothing but perfection. The line between imagination and reality, a fickle thing.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Drama - Chapters: 12 - Words: 60,587 - Reviews: 1015 - Favs: 1,677 - Follows: 1,961 - Updated: 7/24/2017 - Published: 12/4/2014 - Harry P., Tom R. Jr., Voldemort, Severus S.
The Hotline by AliciaRoseFantasy reviews
Public opinion of Spider-Man is beginning to shift. In response, NYPD aims to work closely with the hero to counteract rumours of past police brutality toward the vigilante. But Peter, still frightened from past experiences with aggressive officers, is reluctant to co-operate, until a program once made to communicate with the hero, becomes much, much more. Spidey/NYC Spidey/NYPD
Spider-Man - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 7 - Words: 32,804 - Reviews: 314 - Favs: 1,233 - Follows: 1,248 - Updated: 2/25/2017 - Published: 2/21/2016 - Peter P./Spider-Man
How Troublesome by Rumer Hasit reviews
Shikamaru's life was going fine; he avoided going on missions and Ino, smoked a lot, and watched clouds. Now, he's discovered Naruto's biggest secret, is being forced to go on a mission, and life has gotten a whole lot more complicated. How troublesome...
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 97,572 - Reviews: 743 - Favs: 1,984 - Follows: 1,931 - Updated: 2/1/2017 - Published: 1/29/2011 - Naruto U., Shikamaru N.
The Marriage Stone by Josephine Darcy reviews
SSHP. To avoid the machinations of the Ministry, Harry must marry a reluctant Severus Snape. But marriage to Snape is only the beginning of Harry's problems. Voldemort has returned, and before too long Harry's marriage may determine the world's fate.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 78 - Words: 382,044 - Reviews: 15942 - Favs: 11,339 - Follows: 9,819 - Updated: 11/22/2016 - Published: 4/9/2007 - Harry P., Severus S.
Screw that Skrewt by Ann O'Neem reviews
See, that's what sucked with being crushed to death by a Skrewt. That thing hadn't been bred by a specialist (sorry about that, Hagrid) and its 'parents' had been a Manticore and a Fire Crab. But the thing's that it had a little trick that none had expected. Creating some kind of transdismensional rift in its stomach when it's dying. Yeah, no one had expected that. Slash.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Tokyo Ghoul/東京喰種トーキョーグール - Rated: M - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 9 - Words: 60,320 - Reviews: 174 - Favs: 602 - Follows: 673 - Updated: 5/21/2015 - Published: 8/14/2014 - Harry P.
With Wings of Feathers and Glue by slexenskee reviews
For his safety, sixth year Harry Potter must live abroad while attending Hogwarts. There, lonely and out of place, he meets Alice Cullen, and inevitably, Edward Cullen as well. HPEC
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 77,969 - Reviews: 780 - Favs: 1,877 - Follows: 2,452 - Updated: 5/13/2015 - Published: 8/19/2009 - Harry P., Edward
Break the Sky by Liffae reviews
One lesson Uzumaki Naruto taught the world was that glass ceilings are fragile, and limits are only for the fools who believe in them.
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 40,956 - Reviews: 362 - Favs: 1,708 - Follows: 1,892 - Updated: 2/24/2015 - Published: 8/25/2012 - Naruto U., Sasuke U., Sakura H., Kakashi H.
Viva La Vida by Tiki Rane Gobell reviews
Tom Riddle was secure in his own little world he had built for himself: a secret dark lord that was ruler of magical Great Britain. He had everything he ever wanted...until Harry Potter came into his life. LV(TR)/HP
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 10 - Words: 18,607 - Reviews: 312 - Favs: 1,661 - Follows: 1,054 - Updated: 1/27/2015 - Published: 12/16/2013 - Harry P., Voldemort, Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Adrift in a World by Miss Whiskers reviews
Harry Potter is thrown into an alternate universe due to archaic rules of magic. Hiding under the alias of Chris Collins, he tries to find a place among the suspicion of those he knew and some he never did, as Voldemort's power grows.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 24 - Words: 172,757 - Reviews: 3691 - Favs: 5,673 - Follows: 6,051 - Updated: 12/30/2014 - Published: 6/12/2006 - Harry P.
Daddy Issues by Ann O'Neem reviews
Everybody know that Rokudo Mukuro doesn't have a family. He's a child who was experimented by the Estraneo. But... what if a stranger decided to fray with the young illusionist ? Enter Harry James Potter, wizard who doesn't know when to give up. Proceed with caution, there is a slash harem in the making.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Katekyo Hitman Reborn! - Rated: M - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 23 - Words: 138,980 - Reviews: 784 - Favs: 1,405 - Follows: 1,477 - Updated: 9/7/2014 - Published: 8/21/2013 - Harry P., Mukuro R.
Abyssus Abyssum Invocat by Sin Maxwell and Co reviews
To save the life of the man he loves, Harry Potter called out in the name of something unholy. Now he reaps the dreadful consequences. But what if he could turn the tide in his favor? Will his new master allow it or will he be subjugated forever? Slash! SM/HP.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Kuroshitsuji - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 29 - Words: 70,236 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 1,212 - Follows: 612 - Updated: 7/28/2014 - Published: 5/24/2014 - Complete
Firefly by Reinamy reviews
In which Aburame Shino is the moth and Uzumaki Naruto is the flame. Female!Naruto.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 5 - Words: 39,649 - Reviews: 311 - Favs: 2,556 - Follows: 845 - Updated: 7/13/2014 - Published: 6/27/2014 - [Shino A., Naruko U.] Naruto U. - Complete
Wand Cores by Lydia-kitten reviews
Harry Potter, weathered wizarding warrior in his mid-twenties, finds himself in 1940. Albus is coming up with a theory, and an adolescent Tom Riddle, torn between feeling threatened and piqued, acquires a controversial mentor. Hallows, spell-making, horror, politics and witty banter, served with a Grindledore sidedish. Slow and slightly disturbing TR/HP. First chapters re-polished.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 49 - Words: 241,168 - Reviews: 2035 - Favs: 2,948 - Follows: 3,016 - Updated: 7/7/2014 - Published: 7/16/2010 - Harry P., Albus D., Tom R. Jr., Gellert G.
Poisonous Kiss by enchanted nightingale reviews
When Harry frees Dobby, Lucius scares the house elf and the Savior is left alone with Lucius Malfoy in an encounter with unforeseen results. HP/LM. SLASH. Harry is underage.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 45 - Words: 102,970 - Reviews: 2392 - Favs: 4,126 - Follows: 4,325 - Updated: 8/26/2013 - Published: 5/27/2009 - Lucius M., Harry P.
Vicious Calm by Catilleon reviews
Nagi Uzumaki had always sought companionship. Kyubi no Yoko had always sought a strange cute girlfriend who likes ramen and enjoys destruction as much as him. This will doubtfully end well.Kyubi/femNaru.
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 83,079 - Reviews: 193 - Favs: 689 - Follows: 640 - Updated: 6/30/2013 - Published: 11/12/2010 - Kyuubi/Kurama, Naruko U.
In the Mind of a Scientist by ZenoNoKyuubi reviews
Harry Potter wasn't raised like in canon. He was top of his class, and very intelligent, always seeking to improve things, and so he learned all kinds of things, and, upon entering Hogwarts, started studying all he could get his hands on! Intelligent!Super!Harry Later Mad Scientist!Harry Rated M for Language, Nudity, and Gore Stein-ish Harry Genres: Humor/Romance/slight Horror
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 17 - Words: 82,520 - Reviews: 2138 - Favs: 8,254 - Follows: 4,278 - Updated: 5/4/2013 - Published: 9/23/2012 - Harry P., N. Tonks - Complete
The God of Dragons by RuRuLaLa reviews
Charlie Weasley starts a cult. He regrets it immensely. Meanwhile, Harry has a little girl time with his dragon lady friends. Side story to 'Oh You didn't Know? Yeah He's Awesome'. Gift fic for my 100th reviewer RRW.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,599 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 292 - Follows: 94 - Published: 3/25/2013 - Harry P., Ron W., Charlie W. - Complete
A Snake Named Voldemort by estalita11 reviews
COMPLETE After being turned into a snake and unable to change back, Lord Voldemort is forced to turn to the only other living Parselmouth, Harry Potter. After making a deal, Harry agrees to help the Dark Lord return to his human form. SLASH HP/LVTMR
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 24 - Words: 185,074 - Reviews: 3142 - Favs: 8,990 - Follows: 4,270 - Updated: 6/25/2012 - Published: 4/30/2011 - Harry P., Voldemort, Tom R. Jr. - Complete
Black Vengeance by Teufel1987 reviews
AU Third Year: He spent twelve years in hell for a crime he did not commit. Sent there without the courtesy of a trial. Betrayed by his friends and allies. Now he has broken out. He will find and catch that rat and then, they will pay!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 86,200 - Reviews: 450 - Favs: 2,246 - Follows: 889 - Updated: 6/6/2012 - Published: 8/5/2011 - Sirius B., Harry P. - Complete
The Scars of Human Nature by yaoigirl22 reviews
When he was left with his family, they disappeared. Now thirteen years later the wizarding world, both Dark and Light are in for a shock. Meet It. Edited:02/07/2012
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 22 - Words: 26,628 - Reviews: 488 - Favs: 2,206 - Follows: 993 - Updated: 1/21/2011 - Published: 12/5/2009 - Harry P. - Complete
The Downers by NotYourBestFriend reviews
Bella Swan is a rebel. Edward Masen is a loser. Charlie Swan is a mailman and Elizabeth Masen is a socialite. When you mix them all together, you get one not so happy family. But Edward and Bella aren't just step siblings. Lifes too hard to be that easy.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 22 - Words: 72,892 - Reviews: 323 - Favs: 181 - Follows: 174 - Updated: 12/29/2010 - Published: 8/27/2009 - Bella, Edward
Gryffindors Never Die by ChipmonkOnSpeed reviews
Harry and Ron, both 58 and both alcoholics, are sent back to their 4th year and given a chance to do everything again. Will they be able to do it right this time? Or will history repeat itself? Canon to Epilogue, then not so much... (Reworked)
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 18 - Words: 74,394 - Reviews: 722 - Favs: 3,741 - Follows: 1,169 - Updated: 12/29/2010 - Published: 11/4/2010 - Harry P., Ron W. - Complete
Shut Up and Kiss Me! by slytherin-nette reviews
In the middle of all their silly fighting and childish rivalry, there was only one very simple solution that always seemed to bring Draco Malfoy and Harriet Potter back together. DM/femHP. SongFic - Oneshot.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,212 - Reviews: 93 - Favs: 772 - Follows: 219 - Published: 5/29/2010 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
SnakeHead by Tangerine Catnip reviews
Alex is in the African jungle on his first assigned kill for scorpia accompanied by his instructor Yassen Gregorovich when one of the local snakes decides that Alex’s crotch would be a nice place to take a nap. Fluffy PWP one-shot Alex/Yassen
Alex Rider - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,569 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 318 - Follows: 71 - Published: 3/25/2010 - Alex R./Cub, Yassen G. - Complete
How Will You Kiss by Nia River reviews
COMPLETE. Casting off his haze of grief over his godfather's demise, Harry Potter decides it's time to take action. He won't be alone; Mad-Eye Moody, Emmeline Vance, Tonks and Bill Weasley will be there to help. Not to mention the entire DA. Harry/Bill.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 11 - Words: 44,665 - Reviews: 430 - Favs: 2,395 - Follows: 683 - Updated: 2/27/2010 - Published: 11/8/2009 - [Harry P., Bill W.] - Complete
Like a Concussion by Araceil reviews
For the lols. Slash. After the War Harry ended up hunted by Vamps. Can he ever get a break? Apparently not when he ends up in Forks and dragged kicking and screaming to school for the first time in over a decade.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,349 - Reviews: 663 - Favs: 4,244 - Follows: 1,040 - Published: 10/22/2009 - Harry P., Edward - Complete
Issues by Aisling-Siobhan reviews
Alex has issues. Not surprising considering the extent to which his life has changed in such a short amount of time but that’s not what he has a problem with. Nor does he have a problem with his feelings but who he feels them for: Yassen Gregorovich Slash
Alex Rider - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,947 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 357 - Follows: 68 - Published: 2/18/2009 - Alex R./Cub, Yassen G. - Complete
Incorrigible Infatuation by RestartingInsanity reviews
AU: SLASH: How it started? One day Harry was in panic and the next delirium struck and there he was lying underneath a cruel-hearted Slytherin. He wasn't the most appealing but what was it that made Harry fall? Marcus Flint/Harry - COMPLETE -
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 68,303 - Reviews: 1546 - Favs: 5,964 - Follows: 1,763 - Updated: 1/25/2009 - Published: 12/27/2008 - Harry P., Marcus F. - Complete
The Dispossession of Echizen Ryoma by Sinnatious reviews
When Ryoma finds himself in a tough situation, his pride might keep him swimming, but it’s Tezuka who keeps his head above water.
Prince of Tennis - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 28 - Words: 83,152 - Reviews: 405 - Favs: 1,165 - Follows: 301 - Updated: 5/8/2008 - Published: 4/23/2008 - E. Ryoma, Tezuka K. - Complete
The Hyuuga Swap by uberneko-zero reviews
Naruto is in a brand new relationship with Hinata. But when he meets her cousin Neji, he finds himself inexplicably preoccupied with the dark haired boy, despite his prickly personality. AU yaoi
Naruto - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 52,825 - Reviews: 161 - Favs: 309 - Follows: 105 - Updated: 5/3/2008 - Published: 12/30/2007 - Naruto U., Neji H. - Complete
A Black Comedy by nonjon reviews
COMPLETE. Two years after defeating Voldemort, Harry falls into an alternate dimension with his godfather. Together, they embark on a new life filled with drunken debauchery, thievery, and generally antagonizing all their old family, friends, and enemies.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 31 - Words: 246,320 - Reviews: 6353 - Favs: 17,103 - Follows: 5,972 - Updated: 4/7/2008 - Published: 2/18/2007 - Complete
How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love Lord V by cheryl bites reviews
Nuclear war breaks out and Voldemort casts a spell to stop time. He and Harry alone are left to defuse the missiles and prevent the war. Voldemort’s radiophobic. Oh joy. LVHP. Spoilers for HBP, none for DH.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 18 - Words: 60,391 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 717 - Follows: 682 - Updated: 3/12/2008 - Published: 5/16/2007 - Harry P., Voldemort
It's Tradition by Justice-hime reviews
Tradition, a time honoured practice or set of such practices. Naruto is learning that there are just some traditions that cannot be broken. SasuNaru COMPLETE
Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 22,916 - Reviews: 427 - Favs: 1,251 - Follows: 211 - Updated: 5/26/2005 - Published: 2/21/2005 - Sasuke U., Naruto U. - Complete
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Skewed Compass reviews
SI!Non-Binary!Harry/ Inevitably gay/ #sorrynotsorry/ In which a person has read the books, seen the films, scoured websites and consumed/written so much fanfiction, but imagining what it would be like is so different than how they themselves would make of things. They supposed they would have to do their best. Or they could just kill themselves. . . . Hmm, but that wouldn't be PG.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 15,607 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 184 - Updated: 9/24/2019 - Published: 9/15/2019 - Harry P.
A Price to Pay reviews
Sequel to The Price is Right. It's not all fun and games being a wealthy orphan. I mean, yeah, Harry didn't have to deal with the Dursleys any longer, and lots of pocket money was great, but if someone could hold his hand while a monster was apparently on the loose? That'd be even better.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,240 - Reviews: 180 - Favs: 2,296 - Follows: 3,072 - Updated: 9/14/2019 - Published: 7/10/2018 - Harry P., Mirror of Erised
Godling Ascending reviews
Response to DZ2's 'Harry, the Twice-Blessed Half-blood' challenge. Fem!Harry. Herakles Potter knew she was odd. Exactly how odd turned out to be far odder than she originally thought.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 241,808 - Reviews: 1264 - Favs: 4,471 - Follows: 5,057 - Updated: 3/10/2019 - Published: 2/5/2015 - Harry P.
The Price is Right reviews
Point of deviation: Harry's primary school taught Home Economics. Harry's not going to let the wonders of magic take away his common sense, and if he can get a good deal, he's going to take it. Meanwhile, money is fun, but magic is funner. AU
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 52,637 - Reviews: 1310 - Favs: 7,020 - Follows: 4,528 - Updated: 7/10/2018 - Published: 12/2/2013 - Harry P., Dean T., Justin F., Morag M. - Complete
Bellamy the Beautiful reviews
AU Male!Bella. Slighty cracky. Bellamy wasn't sure what the ginger's problem was but he wasn't going to let some broody douche get him down. So Bellamy had accidentally stabbed him in the thigh, so what? It wasn't like it was on purpose and the guy had been making a face that was plain asking for it. He was just sulking that he wasn't as spicy as Emmett.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Supernatural - Chapters: 3 - Words: 15,453 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 880 - Follows: 911 - Updated: 11/29/2016 - Published: 12/12/2014 - Angela, Bella, Charlie S., Edward
Trouble Comes in Threes reviews
AU. Fem!Harry. John and Sherlock investigate a bizarre case. Meanwhile, A certain Muggle Studies class is on field-trip.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,359 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 529 - Follows: 500 - Published: 12/15/2015 - Harry P., Sherlock H., John W.
The Black Wizard reviews
Fanfic of Azraeos's original fic. Fem!Harry. Harry, through the selection of the Valar, is plucked from her home world and dropped in Middle Earth to complete a task that will ultimately help the Fellowship save Middle Earth. Starts post Fifth year and near the beginning of The Fellowship of the Ring movie.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 23 - Words: 190,659 - Reviews: 899 - Favs: 2,888 - Follows: 3,411 - Updated: 9/10/2015 - Published: 1/26/2014 - Harry P., Gandalf, Boromir
This Isn't Even My Final Form reviews
AU from 3rd book on. Fem!Harry. It was an accident! A tumble with an unknown potion grants Harry consequences no one could have expected. Dealing as well as she can, Harry re-acquaints herself with the person behind the image of the Boy Who Lived.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 11,533 - Reviews: 207 - Favs: 732 - Follows: 913 - Updated: 5/1/2015 - Published: 1/13/2015 - Harry P.
Scream and Shout reviews
AU. Don't-give-an-eff!Fem!Harry. Starts during OOTP. Marie's been having a frustrating summer, a frustration that she tries to relieve in perhaps not the most sensible way. But she doesn't care. She's tired of caring. Screw being the hero for those fickle people, Marie was going to take care of number one.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 48,628 - Reviews: 321 - Favs: 1,429 - Follows: 1,613 - Updated: 4/30/2015 - Published: 5/1/2014 - Harry P.
Picture Perfect reviews
AU. Fem!Harry. James Potter was not an only child, he had an older brother from his father's first marriage. Leonardo Potter married an ambitious woman, one that's willing to do just about anything to get what she wants; what she wanted was a daughter.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 23,390 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 348 - Follows: 457 - Published: 4/23/2015 - Harry P., Fleur D., Justin F.
The Corpse Swallower reviews
Fanfic of kyaru-chan's Harveste series. An unusual introduction after the mother of all temper tantrums leads to Harry gaining an unorthodox upbringing. Keep your appendages to yourself or you might get them bitten off.
Crossover - Harry Potter & Addams Family - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 11,720 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 759 - Follows: 690 - Published: 4/23/2015
The Sea-Witch reviews
AU. Fem!Harry. OC!BWL Starts GoF. Inspired by Disney's Little Mermaid. Alex Potter discovers a most unexpected relative. With cunning, fast-thinking, and plain old Potter luck, they deal with the resurrection of the Dark Lord in the way only two Potters can.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Family/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,968 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 129 - Follows: 103 - Published: 5/18/2014 - Harry P., Neville L., Tom R. Jr., OC