UPDATES IN PROGRESS (AS OF 5/10/2020):

- Kiss Me When I Bleed Chapter 2 (279 words)

- Joyride (Omen) Chapter 6 (1,531 words)

"I am writing to you from a place that burns, with a body that has loved you too much. I am writing this in hope that you burn too." - Salma Deera

"So many things become beautiful when you look." - Lauren Oliver

"And if all that is meaningless, I want to be cured of a craving for something I cannot find and the shame of never finding it." - T.S. Elliot

"Feral moments so valuable you never share them with anyone." - Bhanu Kapil

"A comfort zone is beautiful, but nothing ever grows there." - Unknown

"If I got rid of my demons, I'd lose my angels." - Tennessee Williams

"I think a lot of art is trying to make someone love you." - Keaton Henson

"I want to know what to do with the dead things we carry." - Aracelis Girmay

"I belong to quick, futile moments of intense feeling. Yes, I belong to moments. Not to people. - Virginia Woolf

"I crave complexity in the simplest of ways." - Nicholas Browne

"Once, I saw a bee drown in honey, and I understood." - Nikos Kazantzakis

"The aim of an artist is to represent not the outward appearance of things, but their inward significance." -Aristotle

"I love language because when it succeeds, for me, it doesn’t just tell me something. It enacts something. It creates something. And it goes both ways. Sometimes it’s violent. Sometimes it hurts you. And sometimes it saves you." - Claudia Rankine

About Me: I'm a twenty-four year old college graduate who lives in New York City, and I've been writing ever since I was eleven. What I write is based entirely off of my mood, the films and stories I watch and read, random episodes of Forensic Files, and things people would rather not talk about. I like to peel back the skin of the taboo, and write about what's hidden right beneath the surface, the stories hiding in plain sight. Common or as uncommon as they appear to us. I also struggle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and social anxiety though I've been trying my best to cope.

I apologize for long waits between chapters, but I rather update less frequently with something I'm proud of, than often with something I'm not. Sometimes one story will speak to me more than another one. At the top of this profile I will have all the chapters posted that I'm currently working on with word counts. I will update the counts every few weeks. Feel free to shoot me a PM if you have any questions about these.

Writing Influences/Favorite Authors: Stephenie Meyer (duh ;P), Kitty Thomas, Annabel Joseph, J.K. Rowling, Anna Zaires, L.J Smith, Caroline Kepnes, Meg Cabot, Lynsay Sands

Many of my readers probably know me for the story, Think of England. It reached 8 chapters, totaling 31,406 words before I decided to pull it off of FF. It had caused quite a stir and generated a lot of controversy while it was up. It was through this story where I found immense pleasure while writing. I always came back to it but in the end I decided that being the first major work that I was invested in, that I would try to rework it before maybe posting it up again someday.

Girl, I Need You is my current focus at the moment, and while experiencing bouts of stress, I often find myself drifting towards this story. It's received much more praise than I could have ever imagined. I'll try not to abandon it. [In-Progress]

The idea for The Killing Moon came to me months before I'd actually sat down and written it. It started out very rough, with no direction really, and then one afternoon I was looking at a promising draft. I couldn't believe what'd I'd written, and now it's looking to be by my guess a ten part story. I've always been fascinated with the concept of imprinting, and wanted to give it my own little twist. [In-Progress]

Joyride (Omen) is probably my darkest story on FF. I was in a bookstore, and saw the cover for a book titled The Cellar that really caught my eye, and it stuck with me. I toyed around with the idea of a cellar, and somehow someway my brain led me to find that Bella and Jacob had both been taken by a man who used Jacob essentially as a whipping boy. I had anticipated this would be a four part story, but it's exceeded my expectations, and thus will be longer in length. [In-Progress]

Love Like Suicide is my take on the cliché kidnapping story we all love reading about but wouldn't admit to anyone we know in real life, the one where you want the girl to feel something for the sexy, unhinged guy who just won't take no for answer. This story is probably much lighter than my other kidnapping stories, and with good reason. I want for there to be a romantic slant to the writing, though Bella is so reluctant. [In-Progress]

Kiss Me When I Bleed came to me after watching an explicit video where a man was holding a woman by the throat, staring deeply into her eyes. You could tell that the woman wanted the man, but was frightened by how forceful he was with her. Nonetheless, the connection was there. There was something that had drawn them together, and I tried to create that same raw sexual energy I had witnessed with them but between Bella & Emmett. I am hoping to continue this story, almost as a drabble fic. [In-Progress]

Sicker Than Love is what I've been searching for in a story extensively on FF as a reader myself. I've always been fascinated with ménage, and this idea that a woman can be in love with two different people at the same time. I've researched, and studied drugs in various psych courses and thought a parallel could be drawn between the desperateness that exists in certain relationships, and the dependency some people have with drugs. This story does not have a definite end in my mind, and will continue as long as I have inspiration. [In-Progress]

I was inspired to write, Even If It Hurts Me, for many reasons. One being that I am very interested in BDSM, both in the physical and psychological aspects so much so that one day I hope to have a kink partner of my own. Secondly, while browsing I couldn't find many fics about BDSM that held my interest. Hopefully this one won't disappoint. [In-Progress]

Bloodletting is a former two-shot that I wrote years ago that I have decided to continue. If you're into Darksper like I am, I'd suggest reading it. [In-Progress]

Yours Again is a one-shot I wrote over the span of two days. It came out completely different than I had intended, having been written in first person instead of second person, but it felt much more intimate and engaging after I made the changes. This was going to be a BDSM one-shot and the consequences one might experience if they are new to the scene, but again it felt much more realistic with small hints of kink. I really wanted to play with naivety. [Complete]

I Want You To Notice When I'm Not Around is a one-shot that I remember I wrote in the course of two days. I attempted to make Jacob stay as true to the character Stephenie Meyer had originally wrote him to be. I think I did good on it, and still adore those 4,000 words. [Complete]

Note: Roll On, Roll Off, Molten and Luna are all on temporary hiatus.

I do take requests, so if you would like a certain scenario written all you have to do is PM me. I'll try to get back to you as soon as I can. I, however, am not up for writing with anyone else, or participating in role-plays so please don't take it personally if I decline your offer.

Where to find me:

tumblr: killthethingyoulovemost (.) tumblr (.) com

goodreads: https(:)//www (.) goodreads (.) com/user/show/7657898-jesse