Quotes:

"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams

"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain." -Lily Tomlin

"He who laughs last thinks slowest."

"There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?"

"Old age is like everything else. To make a success of it, you've got to start young." - Roosevelt

PetPeeves in writing (-O-meter)

(Love ya, hate ya- I'll stand by these. Doesn't mean I won't make a slew of my own mistacks.)

1. Confusion between "maybe" and "may be." Be assured, there is a difference. "Maybe" means perhaps. "May be" means perhaps it is so.

2. The (pseudo)word "anyways." The word is "anyway." It is not "anyways." There is no 's'. "Anyways" is not a word. It does not exist, and it does not sound good. It is cacophonous, as it were. As said by a wise man (read: a stand up comedian), "It's shorter. Isn't that a reason to use it?"

3. Stories that are amazing then cut off in the middle and are never seen again. Self-explanatory.

4. People who pick on me through my spelling. There is a difference between correcting me and picking on me. I'm dyslexic, yo. (By the way, never say "yo"...please)

5. People who don't edit. I don't mean every comma has to be in place or that one (or a hundred) typo(s) ruin a story. I'm talking about stories where you can't even tell what sentences mean they're so discombobulated.

6. Words lifted out of a thesaurus and dropped into writing. The beauty of language is in its ability to communicate, its subtle nuances, and its sound. Big words that don't match the meaning the author is reaching for don't help anyone seem smart (The author or the poor reader who now feels stupid for not knowing the definition of "defenestration" (P.S. Look up the definition of defenestration; you won't be disappointed)).

7. Confusion between "blond" and "blonde." The difference is slight, but important. Here it is: "blonde" refers only to females. Example: He is blond. She is blonde. They are blond. Get it? Got it? Good.

Reading this, I realize I sound like a grammar-crazed nut job. The funny thing is I'm really not. Go figure.

P.S. If anyone has actually read this you get a cookie and an "I'm da BOMB!" sticker .

XXX

Future Projects: Please vote in my poll and tell me which stories you want me to work on first! If you're particularly interested (or disinterested) in seeing any of them, or have questions, drop me a PM. The more interest a story generates, the higher up on my priority list it'll go.

A Political Debacle (Avatar): During a recess at a Peace Conference in Ba Sing Se, the young Fire Lord Zuko is abducted by Earth Kingdom rebels...who're convinced he's a lesser noble's son. Oh, this cannot end well... (Action/Adventure/General) (Medium length?).

Phoenix Falling (Avatar): The Avatar is a Mortal World spirit of balance, but the Spirit World has two such spirits of its own: the Phoenix and the Crab. Chang Meiten, Earth Kingdom noble and merchant extraordinaire, is convinced the only path to victory is for the Avatar to harness one of these spirit's power, willingly or not. The Gaang is far from amused. Zuko/Aang/Sokka-centric. Minimal presence of OCs. (Action/Adventure) (Fairly short, but with a longer sequel planed).

Private Fire (Avatar): When the Gaang decided to sneak across enemy lines, Zuko had no idea exactly how inept at-all-things stealth the others really were. In light of this new knowledge, Zuko takes charge...as a Fire Nation Lieutenant? (Humor/Friendship) (A long-ass one-shot).

The Strawberry Chronicles (Bleach): The journey of Ichigo Kurosaki as he makes his unsteady way through a summer of Soul Society boot camp. Watch out, the unwary soul reaper may be swept away. Post-war. (Humor) (medium length?)

A Child's Song (Fullmetal Alchemist): Pre-series divergent. When a report comes in of a 'haunted warehouse' in the ass-end of the eastern district, Major Roy Mustang doesn't take it seriously. In his defense, he never dreamed they'd actually find something out there... Those reports of missing children just started making sense, and two lost little boys might not make it home. A chimera-tale, with a twist. (Action/Adventure/Angst(?)) (I've got no idea how long it'll end up at this point).

Currents in Still Water (Hikaru no Go): As Sai feels his approaching disappearance, anger and jealousy ring in his every step. And unfortunately for Hikaru, such feelings are dangerous in even the most well-intentioned of spirits... and may call to darker shades. (Action/Adventure/Friendship/Supernatural) (Medium length).

Empty Den Syndrome (Naruto): After a year with his cute, little students dodging his heels, Kakashi is finally on his own again...and not doing as well as he thought he would. Pre-and-post time-skip. (Humor/Friendship/Family). (Mid-length one-shot).

XXX

BIG NEWS EVERYBODY (Kind of. Not really.): I now have a personal website (just starting out so not everything's quite put together yet). Why? Because I'm starting to look into trying to get some of my original fiction published, and quite a number of books I've been reading on the subject say publishers like new authors to have one.

So! On the site you'll find out a little about me (not much, sorry), a bit about my original work, some hopefully entertaining rants (about writing, plots gone wrong, and life in general), and a reference on medical terms, conditions, and medical personnel for writers (Note: this is not intended to be taken as medical advice for patient treatment!). I do actually have some (a tiny bit of) authority to put something like that up as I am in a Masters program of what will remain an undisclosed allied medical profession. You'll be able to say yes/no to this as well in a poll at the site (or PM me here!).

The site is at: http:///

Cheers!

As of March 25th, 2014: The next Incident Report chapter has officially been sent off to my wonderful betas. Thank you for being so patient!

As of February 8th, 2015: Incident Report chapter 7 has been sent to my hoard of overworked but rabidly amazing betas. We're almost there, guys!